This is an update to my last post about living next door to a neighbor who is harassing me. Maybe what has happened to me could possibly help others here in the future.
The events as they unfolded \[LONG; Advice at the end if you want to skip]:
My neighbor started banging on my walls, front door, and window around the end of October. She would do this at all hours. I hesitated to contact my apartment management company or the police in the beginning because I was worried that either would assume it was partly my fault. So I set about recording videos of the situation to make my case. I also posted here for any legal advice pertinent to my situation. I received a little advice… you can check that yourself if you wish.
After a couple of weeks of very little sleep, I contacted the apartment management company. I told them what was happening and they also freely told me some interesting things about my neighbor. My neighbors, an older woman and her adult son, have been dodging the management company for years now. The company has been trying to get them to join their company which manages the rest of the building, but the neighbors refuse to answer the door and don’t respond to any mail they leave in their post. They have some sort of private contract with the owner that at the time wasn’t being communicated to the management company. The man I spoke with said he would talk to the family.
After another week or so, things continued to get worse, so I finally called the police for the first of four times. It was early morning around 7am when one officer arrived. He interviewed us in my apartment for about 15 minutes and then went next door to talk with the neighbors. He was in their apartment for about an hour. Eventually we heard the mother (the one who is always committing the harassment), arguing and screaming at the police officer. The police officer came back outside and the mother shoved him and a small scuffle ensued. Eventually the son and officer were able to wrangle her back inside. At this point she should have been arrested, but she wasn’t. One of the many ways the police have predictably been a let down.
The officer came back and reported to us that she was constantly hearing the sound of an idling truck in my apartment and also hearing voices in the sink. The officer and her son both said to her that neither sound existed. And at this point it was confirmed what we already suspected, that our neighbor has some serious mental health problems and that there isn’t much anybody can do.
This continued like this for a couple more months. She would bang on my door in the middle of the night, constantly keep me awake, I would film as much as I could, and occasionally call the police. Even though the police weren’t really helpful, their witnessing the situation would ultimately bolster my case. If the apartment management company came around, the neighbors would refuse to answer the door. One of the occasions that the police came, the neighbor told the police that myself and another neighbor in the building were members of Om Shinrikyo, and had attempted to recruit her. When she refused, we began harassing her. The police never took anything she said seriously because her behavior and everything she said was so outlandish.
New Year’s Eve, things sort of peaked. I had a very early morning flight and she kept me up all night to the point of madness. For nearly two months, I had hardly slept. This night (and more since) she sat outside my apartment banging on my door all night. I wanted to sleep in the park or a karaoke box somewhere, but it was raining and I thought maybe nowhere would be open on new years. Eventually I just left on my trip. Another neighbor told me while I was gone, she was still banging on my wall.
During this entire time I was desperately looking for a new apartment. It took such a long time. I would occasionally couch surf at different friends’ places. But my health and job were very clearly suffering. Even while I was away, I would have nightmares about the neighbor and wake up in a panic. Awake, I would jump at any loud noises I heard. I felt awful.
Finally I secured a new apartment and was ready to escalate the situation with the apartment management company. First, my friend who formerly worked at a different apartment management company, called my current management company with me. We pretty strongly said that they haven’t helped my situation at all. In fact, it was worse every time they got involved. My health and my livelihood were all in jeopardy. A member of the management company said he would visit immediately. He did, and the neighbor actually talked with him. But she wouldn’t listen to anything he said and kept repeating the same outrageous claims as before. In the meantime, my friend helped me draft a list of demands in Japanese. At least two months rent refunded, waive all fees for moving out, and hotel lodging until I could move into my new apartment.
The next day, after yet another night of harassment, I called the management company on my own and held the phone up so he could clearly hear the banging on my wall. I told him it’s not stopping and I’m moving by the end of the month. He immediately called my neighbor and I could very clearly hear her screaming at him on the phone. When he returned my call I told him again that I’m moving and this is an impossible situation. He said the next day he would come with the building owner and all four of us could meet together. I said I was really worried because I legitimately believe she is dangerous. But I was afraid if I refused, the management company would say I wasn’t cooperating and that would kill any chance I have of getting anything out of this. So I agreed.
The following morning they canceled the meeting. They said it was because they were still out of town and couldn’t make it before I went to work. They also had decided that maybe it was dangerous for me to be there as well. But a member of the management company, the owner, and the police would still go while I was at work. I said I still wanted to meet them. I had a mountain of video evidence I wanted to show them. They agreed and we planned for me to come to their office the following day.
I went the next morning with a prepared album on my phone of about 100 videos documenting everything from early November until the very day before (January 11th). I also planned to give them my list of prepared demands. I went with another friend as a witness. We sat for about 2 hours discussing this situation. They told me they had attempted to meet with the neighbors the day before, but no one would answer the door. They dropped off a pre-eviction notice in their post which he showed me a copy of. We went over the events of the last few months. Approximate dates when it began. Dates the police came. I showed them a handful of the videos I had taken but showed them the total list so they could see how documented it was. My misery was really obvious. They had witnessed firsthand what the neighbor is like. The police had witnessed it. I was having trouble keeping my eyes open in the meeting because I had slept only 6 hours in the three days leading up to this point. And just as I was about to present my demands, they made their offer.
The management company and the owner felt really bad about what had happened to me. For my hardship, they were willing to refund me 3 months rent, waive my rent for January and February, and waive all fees related to moving out. I could continue to utilize the apartment as long as I needed for free. I didn’t need to worry about a final move out date. At my convenience, I could drop the keys off whenever I wanted. They asked me to send them videos that show the most egregious examples of the neighbor’s behavior at my convenience to help them build their eviction case. And they would remain in contact with me to update me about what would happen to the neighbors.
I never gave them my full demands. Their offer ultimately exceeds what I was going to ask for. I honestly thought maybe I could get my cleaning fee canceled and maybe not much more. I think they offered me this because I could go after them for much more. But I just want to be done with it. The money offer was confirmed and will arrive next week, just before I sign the contract on my new place. This has been the most stressful thing I’ve dealt with in Japan in my 9 years of living here. Finally it is almost finished.
My advice:
1) Take lots of videos and photos. Create a timeline that shows as clearly as possible what is happening to you. Keep it organized for easy reference. 2) Call the police often. Even though they don’t help directly, their presence turns the pressure up on the management company. 3) Call the management company, but highlight their negligence. In my situation, I could illustrate with my evidence that everytime they came, it got worse. 4) Keep your cool. Even though I was breaking down mentally by the end, I never yelled or lost it with the management company. I could tell them I was angry about the whole situation and suffering immensely. In contrast to my psychotic neighbor, I was polite. I think this really strengthened my position.
Other than a handful of comments on my previous post, I thought the community here was far from helpful. So I’m posting this now to hopefully help someone in the future. This isn’t my regular account so I don’t care about upvotes. And I also don’t check this so much so my responses will probably be slow. Also, this is a good opportunity for me to unload some of the enormous stress I’ve been feeling.