I made this post on a different sub and was told to try to post this here. I hope you’ll hear me out.
I’m a Filipino, 31 years of Age, I have a 1 year college culinary Diploma and currently working in a call center.
I wasn’t able to fully utilize my diploma here since there was a lot things that came went and go.
Honest to truth I was a lockup asocial if you can call it at that and pushed away everyone in my life for years. Something happened a few days after new years that broke me inside and I actually talked to my family for the first time in years. I sobbed so hard and was not pushed away but hugged and loved. I really put them in a lot of strain on them and I take all the blame for it because I did that to myself. I told them everything of what I felt deep inside and what pressured that was put on me as the 2nd child and my Dads supposed successor in the maritime industry but chose not to pursue for a lot of personal factors, they accepted everything I said and I gathered everything I could to start my resume. I decided to break the cage and join the workforce, I landed myself in call center 4 months ago and I think I’m okay right now but not satisfied with just this, I can handle the toxic environment, its not for me but I’ll stick to it for now as my starting point.
My father(currently he’s 62) has 3 years left before he retires and I want to make him proud before that ends and at least give him the smile and not just out of a promise after my new years cry.
As far as my nihongo, its completely weeb-ish trash but I do understand a few words from watching Jdramas from old times.
When I started wondering about my life I reached out to my old colleagues in college that dropped of our college uni, some actually found work during their period but that’s during their period years back, I really had to looked them up and surprisingly also welcomed me with no judgement but welcomed arms.
they gave me a few links to some japanese schooling here though I don’t know yet if they will offer something. I trust what they gave me but I’m looking for other more options.
I’m totally willing to study there and work at the same time, I don’t care if I get laughed my age because I wanna turn my life around and make the best out of it.
I still have savings and pretty much my family is willing to support me to this new journey I’m about to embark for myself and for them. I wanna make them proud and I’m willing to do what it takes its the least that I can do for myself and for them for all the years I put them through. What do I need to do? what do I need to get? What can I do? Please point me to the right direction.
I plan to work for as long as I can in this call center to get work experience necessary.
You can hit me with the honest truth. Please and thank you with deepest gratitude to all of you.
P.s.
The reason why I’m willing to go through all that hassle is to leave grounds of familiarity behind. I’ve been sleeping in our living room or switching to my sister condo on purpose to avoid my own room and kill the feeling of familiarity. I don’t want to step in there see my pc and that feeling of hopelessness sink its fangs and drown me with pressure and suffocate me again. Its difficult to explain.. its easy when the very grounds you’re stepping on and language you hear is something you know far too well.
I hope… this weird explanation gives a bit of insight on why I want to do this.
by Yurisa_Phima