I (25F) am an Australian traveling to Japan in about 3 weeks with my sister (23F) and friend (26F). The first two days of our trip will be spent in the city that I previously visited for a school language trip (9 years ago) and a subsequent 2-month long exchange (8 years ago). I haven’t visited Japan or seen my host family since, except for my host sister who visited and stayed at my house in Australia a few years back.
My host family are GORGEOUS people, especially my host mum, who is so so generous with her time, kindness, and money. I have kept in touch with my host mum and sister over the last 8 years, and they have always asked when I am coming back to Japan as they wish to see me!
So, I messaged my host mum letting her know I’ll be in their city later this month. She replied that she would of course like to meet me when I am there! I let her know the approx. location of our hotel so we could meet nearby but she sent this reply:
\[my name\]と、\[my sister’s name\]と、
ともだちの3人で来るなら
小さな部屋ですが
わたしのいえに3人で
泊まってもいいよ♡
ホテル、キャンセルできるかな？
She doesn’t speak English and it’s been a long while since I’ve formally studied Japanese. I understand the literal English translation of what she is saying, but my question pertains to the nuances of Japanese culture and the expectations around politely accepting/declining offers.
Would it be rude to accept her offer? Does she feel obliged to offer and actually expects me to decline? I don’t want to be a hassle or a bother to her and make her feel as if she has to rearrange her life to accommodate us for these two days that we are in her city. On the other hand, would it be rude to decline her offer? I would not want to come across as ungrateful or “too good” to stay at her house. Her mention of wondering if we can cancel the hotel comes across as if she genuinely wants us to stay at her place. It is possible to cancel our hotel booking up until the day before without a cancellation fee so that doesn’t factor into the equation. It would of course be an incredible experience to stay at their house again and would bring back so many memories and emotions for myself, and allow for us to spend some quality time together.
I’m torn. If anyone has any cultural context they could offer me or suggestions for how to word my reply I would be very appreciative!
by dapagliflozin
