So whenever I go on trips, I bring omiyage mainly just crackers, food and other things. I make it a point to tell our boss it is for everyone. In my previous companies, whenever I hand in my omiyage, my boss would thank me and open it for everyone, send a message to our groupchat and even write a note on the opened package saying this is from CallieinJapan-sensei in which it is usually devoured in a day or two.
For some reason, every time I give her something I got from a trip, she wouldn’t open it and would just keep it under her desk for weeks unopened! Like what??? I go around and mention to my coworkers that I have some omiyage for them and they look at me with confusion and tell me afterwards, they didn’t see any.
I bought memorabilia like keychains for everyone recently from a trip and I put it in the common area as usual while informing her that I got one for everyone. I mean it is common sense like why would I give her more than a dozen of keychains right? She nods and says sure. In the afternoon, I look for it only to see she had tucked them in between her folders and stuff which is of course weird to be picking through. I don’t understand why she does this?
I was at the office working and also staring at the souvenirs and wondering what to do while she was also at her desk when a coworker walks in. This was a few days later and it seems she has continued to keep them along with her belongings.
I loudly tell the coworker that I got some souvenirs and if she had received some. She looks at me confused with the typical “ehhh.???” and I tell her about the keychains. The manager heard the conversation and said she had it, grabbed one from her stash and gave it to her. Meanwhile, the rest is still there and the others have yet to get any.
What do you do in this situation? Just go walking around in each room offering souvenirs to everyone since the manager seems to want to keep it to herself?
I have never seen any of my food omiyages opened and one of my boxes that was sitting under her desk for weeks quickly disappeared one day without anyone getting a bite, like it was somewhat taken home.
Does she think the whole boxes of omiyage are just for her? I am a bit baffled by this behavior but she is my boss so I don’t know what to do.
Edit: I work in a school where everyone is busy in classes so far I have not seen a single teacher or staff go around giving omiyages to us as everyone is busy with kids.
We usually put them in the common area so in their break, they can go grab one.
I don’t know how it works in offices if you guys do that but I have never experienced it in any school I worked at. I understand everyone saying why did you give it to her. I don’t give it to ask her to distribute it but just letting her know I have omiyage. My issue is TAKING THE STUFF AND HIDING IT IN HER AREA after I had put it in the common area. I think it’s odd and I asked.
by CallieinJapan
40 comments
Why are you handing omiyage to her in the first place?
I would open the box and keep it on your desk. Or go around and hand them out, make sure everyone gets one.
Just tell every coworker you got omiyage and that she has it. They will go and ask her as your other coworker did
Some people will bring one omiyage for the boss and one for sharing. I think the boss probably mistaken the gift as something for her only as you give it to her.
If you want to show respect to her while still only get one box of omiyage, I will probably just open the box, take the whole thing to her and gift her the first one out of the box, then put the rest in the common area for sharing.
I would always hand it out myself or give it to the team admin with instructions as to who they were for. Your boss might not feel it’s their job to hand them out, who knows.
generally any where you open it. Take the snack out yourself, hand them out one by one starting from the manager or whoever higher up. If you just give the box to the manager then it’s just assumed that ‘that’ specific box is for the manager and you have a separate box for everyone else. At least that how i would interpret it reading your situation. Idk about the keychain though that’s weird af.
In my office, we normally give it to the youngest member of the team with a hand written note, they would be in charge of share to all members that are in the office starting by herarchy and leave the rest on a common desk, which is understood to be ffa.
There’s an easy solution to this problem: put the omiyage in a shared spot in the office with a note that says “I brought everyone omiyage from […], enjoy! –Your Name”. Or you can just walk around the office and put it one everyones desk.
I don’t know anyone who just hands a box of omiyage directly to their boss because it’s not the bosses job to hand out omiyage for you. I would think that most bosses would think that it’s all for them and their family if you give it to them directly tbh. The boss usually get special omiyage compared to coworkers. For example, you might bring your boss a nice bottle of sake for omiyage and a box of cookies for everyone else.
I don’t know what your office situation is like, but whenever I give out omiage, I put it in the common area (break room or near the fridge) with a note saying it’s from my trip to wherever.
Why are you handing the omiage to your boss, especially since you seem to know she just stashes it? Next time, put it in a common area for everyone to get. Or, if you all have separate offices, you may actually have to go to each staff and hand them theirs.
Your boss just sounds like one of those people who need to staff things for themselves. Weird.
I think she’s confused about why you are giving it to her, forgetting about it, and never following up on it.
Why would you give it to your boss? Hand it out my guy.
Is giving it to your boss to distribute normal?? I and everyone else at my workplace just distribute it ourselves. Don’t see why the boss needs to be involved.
Just go around the office and put something on everyone’s desk. Doesn’t need to be a whole conversation or anything, and they don’t even need to be there at the time. Leave your greedy weirdo boss out of it, put one on their desk and that’s all they get lol.
Every company has a different way of doing omiyage, my last company was small so we’d just hand them personally to everyone and leave the rest in the common area. My current company is a little bigger and everyone just puts it in the common area with a note saying who it’s from. I’d see what other coworkers/senpai do and follow their example
Personally I would just take it and give it out to each person’s desk or put them in some common area like others suggested.
Give them to people yourself.
Either buy a second omiyage for everyone else, or buy one and go around and offer it to everyone yourself.
Yeah I’ve always just left one thing on each desk or handed directly. Fairly common where I’ve worked. Especially good to avoid weird seniors who do this kind of stuff.
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I would just stop buying omiyage in the first place…
Have you asked your co-workers what they recommend? I’m sure they have ideas, especially if they want to keep getting your souvenirs.
Well, I’m kinda boss at my place and what previous bosses did was to set a omiyage spot next to the coffee maker. When somebody brings me a box of cookies or senbes saying it’s for my team, I put it there and send a message to the members that I had a guest from this or that company and (s)he left a gift for everyone. If a member comes back from a trip, they put their omiyage next to the coffee machine and also messages everyone (often with a pic of the gift).
It could vary with workplace of course but usually I would say put any gifts in a common area with a little memo saying “ご自由にどうぞ” (please help yourself).
More general advice – just stop buying omiyage. No one whose opinion matters cares whether you come back with omiyage.
Open box go around giving them out and then leave it in the lunch room with a note
Your boss sounds like a hoarder weirdo. But in general, the person who brought the omiyage should be responsible for distributing it personally (or leaving it in a common area and announcing it). IMO it’s kind of rude to give it to your boss and expect them to be the one doing the work of distributing it….
I’ve never seen nor heard people giving it to their boss/manager, just put it in the common area and either 1. Everyone knows the spot it’s free game or 2. Sends message to team
Literally everyone who gives out omiyage at my work individually places one on each person’s desk. It’s not that hard.
Alright so because you work at a school, is it the vice-principal the manager you’re talking about who’s hoarding your gifts? The head teacher? And if it is, why would you possibly be giving the gifts to your vice-principal or head teacher to give out? That’s absolutely not in their job description and I can understand if they’re annoyed a lower rank teacher is giving them a job to do that’s well below them. And being in that position they probably assumed the gifts were just for them.
There’s an office lady/man in every school whose job is to distribute omiyage to everyone and tell them who it’s from.
As for the keychain scenario, no idea there. You’re sure you clearly told them it’s for everyone? They may have just tuned you out when you said you got another omiyage and and just yadda yadda’d you in their head and thought, “Alright okay another gift, I’ll go pick it up later.”
Some people are greedy hoarders. It’s like a sickness.
Yes
What happens when other people bring omiyage/go on trips? Do you receive anything?
You could try potentially opening the omiyage, putting a note on it that it’s from you and for everyone, and then bringing her one and giving it to her like “I brought some omiyage for everyone, here’s one for you” if you want to keep some of that feeling that you are specially giving her one. It sounds a bit weird though. I think try to put it out at a time when there are others around so that many people see that it’s there and maybe take one etc. That would make it harder to randomly hide afterwards potentially.
why not open the omiyage in the common area and take a picture, then send an email to your coworkers letting them know along with a picture. Eventually people will start to wonder.
Not buying omiyage would have the same effect except it would be cheaper.
omiyage is so annoying lol
I had a boss like that once. I just stopped bringing him omiyage. When I had to, I’d choose only the cheapest possible ones. If I had a friend to whom I wanted to give any omiyage, I’d give them secretly.
Nope.
You bring a box of tissue and carry your gift to each desk and put a tissue on the desk and one piece of your cake or cookie or whatever on each desk.
Japanese people dont do the whole “everybody come and get it” thing well at all.
You have to take it to them
If you have a teacher’s room, just place one on each desk. At my old school, we typically put them in the inboxes so they wouldn’t be missed. If you don’t have a teacher’s room, then, yeah, hand them out. Your boss is a weirdo.
Read the other comments. She honestly sounds mentally ill. Are you sure there aren’t other things that have gone missing here or there, from the other staff or even students?
In any case. Hand them out personally yourself from now on. All the best.
What do other people do?
She is being deliberate. She probably doesn’t want people to like you more than her or in general. Was she the hiring manager or were you placed with her? Might be a reason.