Sorry if I've flaired this incorrectly. I'm really not sure what flair would apply to a situation like this, but I did my best to choose. Let me know if I should change it.
First of all, this is going to be a super-specific question and I'm aware I'm not likely to find somebody who's in the same situation as me. This is just a shot in the dark as Google and Reddit search have turned up nothing useful for me.
So I'm 24 years old, planning to move to Japan after graduating with my bachelor's degree. I've got a decent plan for the first few years and am not seeking advice in that department. The main issue, and the one I need advice for, is that I want to have a baby at some point in the future. Most people would say to find a Japanese citizen to marry, and I would have nothing to worry about. The glaring issue with this is that I'm a lesbian.
Now before I continue I want to say, I know what the state of gay marriage rights are in Japan, and I'm willing to live with that. I'm hoping LGBT rights laws will get better in the future, but not counting on it. So if I'm planning to live in Japan and have a baby, I've accepted that I'll likely be single, at least in the eyes of the law. When I asked my mother for advice she just told me I should find a man who was okay with a platonic arrangement, like a green card marriage, but that is just not an option for me. I won't do it. And that makes things a lot harder.
My main question is just that, well, is this feasible at all?? I'm not really planning to have a baby and then move to Japan, mostly because I really just do not want to live in America any longer than I already have, but also because I doubt I'll be able to afford moving once I have a baby. My family isn't that well off and I'm not a tech major or in med school or anything that will get me a high-paying job.
But will I even be able to have a baby in Japan at all, since the "natural method" isn't an option and I'd have to seek alternate paths? Would that be harder for me as a foreigner? Would my baby even have a decent chance of living normally if they aren't part of a family registry? Should I just adopt or would that be even more expensive for me? Would it affect my long-term visa or chances of getting one if I had a child out of wedlock?
Sorry for the barrage of questions. I'm just scared and worried that if I live the life I really want, I'll never be able to have a child, which is something that I genuinely do want in the future. Has anyone been in a position like this? Is there any advice anybody can give me? All of the posts I found were by people who had a child and wanted to immigrate, or people who were having a child with a Japanese spouse, and none of that was really helpful for me.
And if I'm just being naive and unrealistic, you can tell me that too. I just want to know if I can ever have both, or if I'll have to leave one goal behind.
by Minouet