This might be a vent so please skip this post if you want to.
I am of Japanese descent and been naturalized… i know it might be cliche to almost all foreigners in this sub but i totally feel powerless and voiceless here even though i have lived here for almost 10 years now, can read, write, speak Japanese(N2 passer), can almost pass as Japanese looking, i try my best to follow norms etc.
I’ve experienced prejudices, injustices if you will, i won’t elaborate anymore. There are situations that are ignorable, and I don’t know if it is the foreigner in me, but i must admit there have been times i felt the need to speak up and when i did, i always ended up the bad guy. It seems this isn’t exclusive to my experiences only though because i have heard of similar stories from other foreign friends that experienced similar situations.
I love Japan, and are thankful for some if not plenty of privileges that i get to experience whilst living here but it just gets so hard to live here sometimes because i feel like i compromise myself a lot in order to fit in and just be accepted.
8 comments
I’m sympathetic, but would you mind explaining precisely what you expected from Japan?
For example, a sense of belonging?
Venting feels good, doesn’t it? You might need to do that more often.
If it makes you feel any better, my kids who were born in Tokyo and have never set foot outside the country and barely speak English are also not called Japanese, will never be considered Japanese and will be “surprising” other people with their Japanese fluency, and explaining that other races exist for the rest of their lives. The island mentality here runs deep. People cling to weird things for their self pride. If it wasn’t this it would be round cheekbones, or something.
My point is, it’s not an attack to you personally. Don’t take it like that.
The faster you accept that you will never be Japanese, in the way that we “naturalized foreigners” will also never be, the faster you will enjoy your time here. Lean into being foreign and your foreignness instead. That also has some strengths here, whereas most native Japanese speaker cannot compete with your English. Work on being great at both.
Sorry to hear that, your not alone and for that reason know that there are plenty of people here who are able to accept you for you and not what Japanese society says you should be.
Forget about wanting to fit in with the masses. Find a few people that accept you for you and not some arbitrary mold you need to conform too. The ones who try to fit in completely are the boring ones hammering their personalities and the things that make them unique down.
Are you me? We have the exact same background and timeline lol I just learned to go with the flow for the most part though. I don’t stick my neck out as much compared to when I was back home, but maybe that’s just from age
Welcome to being a minority. Perhaps you can take some comfort in knowing there many others who have similar feelings. It is not even unique to Japan – unfortunately very few places in the world treat minorities inclusively and with equality.
>there have been times i felt the need to speak up and when i did, i always ended up the bad guy.
You’re aware already but yeah, that’s normal here, it’s not kosher to speak against the 空気 lol which is also collaborative if we’re talking about a situation of more than 2 people, especially if you’re the younger/junior member in the situation. Unfortunately this has nothing to do with who is in the right and who is wrong.
The Japanese way to express your uncomfortable feelings is more like silent treatment, ignore, make some distance, ghost, etc. I guess.