Early followup, still in the thick of it, but I have direction. Going to share the guidance I’ve received over the last day in case it is useful to anyone else, and then I shall mysteriously disappear.
Insurance is going to cover the cost of the new futon (about 3 man). This is a significant relief.
Regarding everything else:
I spoke some of my Japanese contacts—friends, former professors, family, etc. One of the people I talked to had gone through a very similar situation in Japan before, so they were incredibly helpful and knowledgeable. I received the following advice from everyone:
-The father’s requests are suspicious and exploitative from a Japanese perspective, as well. Particularly, asking for his travel costs and emotional distress are considered unreasonable. They believe he is going to try to get as much money out of the situation as possible.
-I was warned that I should not try to discuss this with him directly, and I should not try and work out the details of compensation by myself. According to my friends and family, issues between neighbors in Japan are usually worked out through third parties by talking to the landlord, insurance, and real estate agent. I pay for insurance to cover accidents like this. When they are coming to me with these requests, I need to direct them to my insurance to work out the details. If I do send them anything out of my own pocket, I need insurance to draw up an official settlement. While they are communicating with insurance, I should wait and not send them any money. If they approach me about the issue, I should kindly redirect them to insurance.
-Apparently there are two people at my contracting agency working on this issue—the person in charge of organizing housing (have been referring to her as my boss), and the person in charge of organizing insurance. A professor explained to me what their perspective and stance in this situation might potentially be: They are prefectural employees, and anything they advise me to do may come back to bite them if things go wrong. They are likely very hesitant to ‘rock the boat’, so to speak. Anything that happens here sets a precedent. My boss is also likely as confused and uncertain about this situation as I have been. I’m planning on bringing gifts to them at their office when things are resolved.
-Speaking of resolutions, apparently, this is going to take a very long time. I was getting stressed out about it developing and extending over the course of the month, so it was reassuring to hear that I should sit back and not expect the issue to be concluded for several months. The person who had navigated a similar situation said that her issue took about three or four months to resolve.
-Japan has options for free legal consultations. I was sent a few links and am looking into that. I was advised to consult with someone for guidance.
-Looking for someone to call about checking out the tap hookup. I’m not sure where I went wrong installing the machine, or if I even did go wrong, and so I’m going to have a professional find out. Someone mentioned in the comments on my last post, Japanese washing machines are pretty straightforward with installation. I installed it with a neighbor in my building and checked with them to make sure it looked correct before I ran it—but they weren’t a professional or anything, so obviously, still on me if I fucked it up.
-Mysteriously, my building put up signs last night that they’re having issues with their water pipes, and will be shutting water off over the weekend to do some repairs. I have no idea if this has anything to do with me, and nobody has contacted me about it, so probably it doesn’t. But I do wonder if the leak was some kind of pressure issue with the pipe? Or maybe I’ve somehow destroyed my building’s piping. Who knows! Will have someone look at it.
-One friend looked it up, and this kind of dispute is not unheard of in Japan—neighbors asking for too much after an incident. Apparently, emotional compensation is almost never awarded except in malicious cases. This is coming from my friend looking it up on the internet, so I’m taking it as vague guidance and not law.
Given all this, I communicated with my boss and am gonna sit back and ride it out. I will follow their advice and work it out through insurance.
It’s been a long year in Japan. Going through all of this on top of everything else has confirmed to me that I really don’t want to keep struggling through the isolation here for the sake of it. I’m planning on leaving in the spring, and that honestly feels relieving. I’m so excited! I’m going to move in with my partner and pursue my lifelong dream of training goldfish to jump through tiny hoops.
Thank you to the folks here who offered advice, perspective, and information. It was useful!
24 comments
Thanks for the update. I’ll continue to lurk but I hope things work out well for you. Kudos for not rolling over for the sake of the 和
This is great news; you deserve to have a few things go your way after how you’ve been treated.
Your insurance company is paying for the futon, as they should. And it’s great to see Japanese people on your side acknowledging that the father is looking to take advantage of you.
You might want to give the son a gift to compensate for his futon, even if its depreciated value is zero; humans need to sleep and the thing he sleeps on was suddenly taken from him. But everything else should be handled by the insurance company.
> I’m going to move in with my partner and pursue my lifelong dream of training goldfish to jump through tiny hoops.
After having navigated life in this country, such a dream should be a cakewalk 🙂
As I mentioned in your other discussion, compensation for emotional distress isn’t a thing in Japan, especially for something that minor. I would say you aren’t even obligated to pay the father’s travel expenses because there’s nothing about the incident that required him to go there, so that was entirely his choice. They’re just trying to rip you off. Don’t let them extort you and don’t let that incident sour you on Japan because most Japanese people aren’t that way.
Good man.
Although I’m completely on your side and think the father is an asshole trying to take you for a ride, I do feel bad for the son.
I can imagine coming home after a week away, tired as hell and just wanting to take a shower and jump in bed, only to find out it’s damaged and smells like shit. With work And then not being able to sleep properly for a few days….pretty annoying…
Maybe give him a small gift or something
Thank you for the update.
It looks like you’ve got everything covered. Well done! Thanks for posting a follow up… this is great reference information for everybody.
You are such a nice guy. If it were me I’d just tell him to stop annoying me or I’ll sue him for harrassment
This is a very key point to be aware of. Even if these people SHOULD be taking care of it, the problem is almost certainly impacting several people, not just your supervisor, and as you say, they are being put in a position where they have to deal with it, and what they do MAY set precedence. Add in the fact that they are city employees and categorically cannot go “off-book” and these things take aaaaages. No one wants to be the one setting precedence, so there will be a LOT of teeth sucking and consultation and trying to make the problem go away. Not pushing the point repeatedly because things are moving slowly is probably the way to go.
I think you are right. Express gratitude, omiyage etc. This situation IS causing a hassle for people. However, again, it IS their job to deal with it. At some point someone will have to deal with a similar situation and saying shouganai or muri every time is just shit.
>-Apparently there are two people at my contracting agency working on this issue—the person in charge of organizing housing (have been referring to her as my boss), and the person in charge of organizing insurance. A professor explained to me what their perspective and stance in this situation might potentially be: They are prefectural employees, and anything they advise me to do may come back to bite them if things go wrong. They are likely very hesitant to ‘rock the boat’, so to speak. Anything that happens here sets a precedent. My boss is also likely as confused and uncertain about this situation as I have been. I’m planning on bringing gifts to them at their office when things are resolved.
Thanks for sharing, this was helpful and also a nice follow up. I wish you the best and hope you have a better time in Japan!
A few months back I had a similar issue. My apartment complex called and said there was a leak coming from my place and it was reported from people below me. It was also from my washing machine pipes. They sent someone to investigate immediately and admitted that it wasn’t my fault at all, and that was the last I heard of it. They fixed it up and my hands were clean. I would definitely second the idea to look into getting the pipes inspected professionally. It’s very suspicious that those signs would appear. It’s possible your landlord or whoever is trying to dodge the blame on this one.
Regarding Japanese plumbing: They tend to use a compression fitting with thick rubber gasket. If you used an old gasket, it might have been cracked from lack of moister. If you over tighten the gasket, it will buckle and leak. You should also have a water pan under the machine for any minor leaks (plastic tray that the entire machine sits on) and watch it like its your first porno. I would be paying close attention the first two times running it before trusting any plumbing I do myself. My washer leaked a steady drip and I had to adjust the placement of the gasket and redo the fitting to stop it. Don’t try to reuse gaskets unless you are desperate, as it may become compromised after the first use. The metal can dig into the rubber and create spaces for water to leak through.
It is always important to know where your shutoffs are, and have the tools to use them. worst case, you hull ass outside and turn off the water to your entire apartment. You should find out where this shutoff is and if it is accessible. Mine is at least, but inaka life.
As a side note, take pictures of the condition of your apartment, including discolorations on walls, leaking faucets and report to your CO and landlord. Even if it doesn’t bother you, you should have a picture of the issue with a message with timestamps for your own protection if the issue ever comes up. I had all the faucets replaced for various issues including leaks, sticking and worn out, cracked vanity base, cold water making god aweful high pitched noises when used etc. Even if you don’t care if they get fixed, let the landlord know the condition everything is in whenever you love into an apartment, regardless of what country you live in. It will save you time and money later.
The image of the father trying to hit up your insurance with his scam-artist routine and getting told to eat shit is hilarious and I love it
Offer him 1 yen for his “emotional distress” and tell him to go fuck himself
I love living in Japan, but your last line of finally leaving and feeling relieved and excited hit hard to be honest. Maybe because I’ve been having a difficult time at work in the last couple of weeks…
But yeah, I bet it feels awesome. I’d probably wake up every day with a smile, looking forward to go back home (or somewhere new).
I’m glad everything seems to be going well after all! Enjoy the rest of your stay here, Japan is great when you’re not going through this kind of issues.
Best of luck to you! Thanks for the detailed update. Your post is going to -for sure- help people in the future. Great reference with good info from both sides of the “foreigner living in Japan” experience. Oh, and fuck every person who tries to exploit the good will of neighbors through scams like this. Because let’s be plain, it is a scam. 3man yen for water damage to a futon to start with…
Thanks for taking the time to write up such a great report! You’re doing a service for the community.
I actually was in the son’s position myself a couple years back.
Came home from work one day and my entire kitchen area was flooded, walls soaked. Landlord had a look upstairs and apparently the old man living there overstuffed his washing machine, it overloaded and water was everywhere. His own kitchen area was soaked as well, but the brung of the water had flown downwards.
Insurance covered the damage, although like you said it was a long process. I was pissed at the dude, but because everything was going to be fully covered despite some of the damaged goods being many years old I was fine.
But what really surprised me was that he knocked on my door one day and gave me an apology envelope of １万円 for distressing me. I told him I didn’t need it because our insurances were covering everything, from new wallpaper to flooring to even appliances. In the end I was actually going to come out of this a bit ahead because my own damages were also going to be fixed up so when I moved I wouldn’t have had to cover it.
But he absolutely insisted and it felt like he was going to wrestle me to the ground and stuff it into my shirt with how forcefully he was trying to have me take his apology money.
So I guess for the older generation (he was probably around 60 or so) maybe this kind of compensation really was the norm, who knows. Just chiming in to say I have heard about this before and experienced it myself.
Scammers gonna scam.
Oh, ow! I hurt my fingers typing this reply! I demand compensation for rehabilitation, emotional distress and time missed from work!
Pay me reddit!
One thing maybe unrelated but slightly related, is that many Japanese people will shit on Chinese people for being ‘conniving’ or ‘cheating’ or something else with regards to unethically obtaining currency.
Then I see threads and hear stories like this and it’s hilarious how hypocritical people can be.
That is all. Good to hear there’s some progress being made OP.
>Mysteriously, my building put up signs last night that they’re having issues with their water pipes, and will be shutting water off over the weekend to do some repairs.
You should make sure to take pictures of this flyer and your building and let your boss know. It might not have been your washer at all…
Glad it all seems to be (maybe) working out.
One thing that struck me, though…….. ***30,000 yen for a fucking futon?*** Jesus christ you could get an OK-ish proper mattress for that price.
I bet when the father talked to the landlord and found out the city was involved, he smelled money and decided to milk it for all he could get. Frankly, it’s pretty amazing that he was even able to get 30,000 yen for Grandma’s used futon.
Is it possible that the drain for your washing machine got clogged up and that is what caused the water to overflow?
I installed my own washer and it is really hard to mess it up, at least the one that I had….
What a stressful case. I hope you will get it resolved smoothly. It certainly looks like you’re moving in a good direction towards resolve.
Wanted to say re: water connection. I remember washing machine to faucet can have a click on type of locking joint between hose and faucet, but then also 3 small screws that need to be tightened around the faucet so in case of pressure it doesn’t pop off. Good luck!