I picked up a copy of Unlocking Japanese (Cure Dolly) and was surprised to find that she has a high opinion of dropping subject markers that are “understood” and then gives an example of a child giving an explanatory oration. Yeah, of course, in this situation it works. But that’s not life.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been in situations *when multiple people are involved* and short replies in emails or Line chats where I completely infer the wrong thing.
Example situation:
My wife’s dad is very sick, and I’m over at her mom’s house fixing her mom’s phone. My wife hasn’t seen her dad in days, he might die. The mom is going to the hospital after the phone is fixed. So I text my wife that we will be finished in 5 minutes, in English. I’m setting up a hotspot on the phone so the dad can play shogi on his ipad. I’m probably going to have to go to the hospital because the mom is very bad with technology. We’re discussing all of this in detail. I have not offered to the mom that I can go to the hospital, in the event that my wife backs out. I don’t want to go by myself, nor do I know which hospital it is or how I would even navigate visiting someone that isn’t a blood relative during these pandemic lockdowns. We live five minutes away from the mom’s house. My wife is home and is not busy at the moment.
So my wife texts me back in Japanese:
病院に行く
**Alright Japanese geniuses, pop quiz!**
1. Is that a question or a statement?
2. Who is going to the hospital? Me and the mom, everybody, just the mom, my wife by herself right now without us, or is asking me to go?
Hold on to your fancy fountain pens for the exciting conclusion!
I assume that she wants to see her dying dad for five seconds, so I reply in English, “Yeah, let’s go in 10 minutes”. Lets! Let’s is basically a Japanese word at this point because I see *Let’s Halloween* all around AEON Mall, so there’s no doubt about it’s inclusiveness.
…
So I’m sitting in the living room waiting and my wife never comes. Actually, she decided to take a nap. Nobody is answering Lines anymore. Mom can’t get a hold of her either and looks confused why I’m loitering. So I excuse myself and go home.
Awesome Japanese, great job. Also my wife is possibly a jerk and doesn’t mind if her dad kicks it.
This shit always happens to me. People drop their watashi’s and watashitachi’s and I am completely lost.
2 comments
>病院に行く
>1. Is that a question or a statement?
It’s a statement. If it’s a question in text, there will be a question mark, or a question marker “の/か”, unless if she miss typed
>1. Who is going to the hospital? Me and the mom, everybody, just the mom, my wife by herself right now without us, or is asking me to go?
Your wife, and possibly everyone else.
>This shit always happens to me. People drop their watashi’s and watashitachi’s and I am completely lost.
I don’t think the dropping of the watashi is the only problem in this case. Subjects and details are often dropped in English as well. I think the issue is you and your wife not communicating clearly in general.
I’ve had similar issues, but solves it by being extra clear. Instead of “let’s go in 10 minutes”, which in her perspective also can mean that you will finish up in five minutes, then go home, and go from there, so she might be waiting for you… Maybe do “Ok, will you come here first?” Or “ok, let’s meet at XXX in 10 minutes”.
Both sides are fairly unclear on the details on where you should meet up in 10 minutes, so it’s better to clarify than to assume. But that’s more a general communication issue than a language issue.
Agree with the other commenter that you appear to be just bad at communicating in general.
OP, when you say that “you’ll be done in 5 minutes”, that’s the only bit of info you’re giving. Sure, we can infer that you’ll be free to do anything after those 5 minutes. But you haven’t said exactly what you plan to do afterwards. You only said you “probably” have to go to the hospital, but again, you don’t clearly say if you’re going to go or not.
You assume too much here. You assume your wife wants to go to the hospital. You assume she knows what you mean when you say “I’ll be done in 5 minutes”, which like I said above, doesn’t offer any information beyond “I will be done with this activity in 5 minutes”.
The subject can generally be understood if all other relevant information is communicated properly.