Boss won’t let girlfriend quit

My Japanese girlfriend works in some shitty bar in oita. Her boss is the classic manipulative douche who always convinces her to work extra and fill in for people, “because it’s her problem not his” type of deal.

I’m trying to get her to quit, but she says that the bars in oita are some interconnected yakuza ring, and they’ll never left be able to leave her house if she quits on the spot. Pretty sure she is also being paid under the table as well.

Just want to check to see if someone could give me any insight as I think she has paranoia about the whole thing. I know the yakuza are dying out and I think she is over reacting about her boss when in reality he can’t do anything.

14 comments
  1. The Yakuza is dying out? lol, you’re highly delusional, they just became more sophisticated and adapted their business models with time.

    To your issue, quite obviously, from a legal perspective they can’t stop her from quitting, but if she actually involved herself in Yakuza business then that might not matter so much. In any case it doesn’t sound like she wants to quit and you have no business forcing your gf to quit her job that’s actually not much different than Yakuza.

  2. Does she have debt with the Yakuza somehow and is working to pay it off? If no, then I don’t think there would be trouble with yakuza nor do I don’t think it is likely a bar would be managed by a yakuza.

  3. Can she not find another job then put in 2 week notice? She doesn’t need to quit on the spot. Sounds like some type of self esteem issue where she can’t do anything for herself and needs others to tell her what to do.

  4. My dude. I just looked at your other post. If this woman is abusing you and pulling knives on you, and apparently mixed up with organized crime, why do you want to stay with her? Is she the first asian girl to let you see her naked or something? Run away.

  5. It’s rough, but you can’t force someone to make a choice they aren’t ready to make. All you can do is be there for her and support her how you can. Hopefully with time she will see the light and make the right choice.

  6. So you fell in love with a bargirl, and being the white knight you are, you want to rescue her? Apparently, she does not want to be rescued.

    Do you know how much she is making? Are you ready and able to come up with the same money after you rescued her?

    The yakuza story could be true, or not. If true, you should stay far, far away from it, or some day you’ll find yourself in the trunk of a car, and released naked in the woods near (or maybe not so near) Gunma.

  7. So you’re living the premise of a **netorare** direct to video.

    A girl who gets blackout drunk, and starts fighting strangers probably isn’t the best long-term goal. Moreover, how do you know that she hasn’t cheated on you, and she doesn’t realize what she’s doing?

    Do you need a branch yackie to be the cherry on top?

    It’s time to head for the door, don’t mess with her anymore.

  8. Dude – as people are repeatedly telling you, you’re in an abusive relationship with an unstable person.

    Your best move is to slowly begin creating distance with her, and then blocking her. Otherwise, you’re signing up for constant drama, problems, involvement with police, violence, and just general nightmares. Forever.

    Unfortunately, you’ll ignore this advice and the advice that everyone is trying to give you.

    In fact, you’ll come up with all sorts of justifications of why you should stay with her. You’ll say things like “I’ll just give her one more chance…”

    Hopefully as the problems continue to escalate, and things get worse and worse, you’ll think back to this comment thread, and follow the advice everyone is giving you.

    It’s just a question of, do it now, when it’s much easier to create distance and leave.

    Or, do it later, when things are much, much worse.

    Good luck brother.

  9. What kind of bar is this? A girls bar? Snack? Are drugs around there? The higher up the mizushobai ladder it is the more heavy the yakuza involvement…Don’t kid yourself there are plenty of yakuza around still, bars are prime money laundering spots even if the owner isn’t a member, he could be paying protection money.

  10. Does your girl have family near or somebody you can talk to?
    Also I don’t know enough details about your situation but beating addiction is tough and it sounds like she is in a rough spot.

    Just out of curiousity
    Does your girl or any of her coworkers or that douche boss have any tattoos?

  11. Too much shitposting by trollers jealous of your lifestyle here.

    There’s lawyers who specialize in dealing with the Yakuza. Maybe look some up. The problem will be that most of her friends and connections are somehow associated with these people which is interesting and involving for her. She has to cut almost everyone dead (ha!) which is very hard to do. No friends is better than bad friends. Some people can’t make the hit to the lifestyle it demands.

  12. Sir, judging for your responses here, you are in denial. I’m sorry but also had to check your previous post that was mentioned here about your gf’s abusing you. You’re still a young adult and have plenty of time to find a more healthy relationship! THIS one, is not. You need to exit, for the sake of your own well-being. This isn’t a “Trust me Bro” kinda reply, but someone speaking from experience and who actually as a result got burned and scarred big time from ignoring red flags repeatedly. It took me a while to heal. Leave this person.

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