Elephant breeding efforts failing despite big moves by Japan zoos

5 comments

1. I saw an Elephant at a Japanese zoo once, and it ruined the entire day for me.

   Most depressing thing I have ever seen. It was clearly depressed and unhappy. Elephants absolutely should not be kept without huge amounts of open space, and this was a depressing concrete island.

2. Kichijoji/Inokashira zoo celebrates Hanako, the elephant they kept in solitary for so many years and she died alone. Animal rights groups basically made them write a promise to never keep another elephant.

   …and Hanako was not the last one by far. Poor babies. Breaks my heart.

3. Even Japan is bumming out elephants.

4. Fuckin’ herbivore elephants, intimidated by the educated, sexually liberated, and empowered female elephants, insecure about their masculinity, and have resigned themselves to their rooms to play video games, watch anime, read manga, and eat peanuts.

   Elephant Yojimbo had this to say : I don’t want any STDs, that’s why anime girls are the best!

   Elephant Hanako : Dareka! ONEGAI! MURA MURA! HAITE!

   Elephant Larry : Give me an anime pillow err’day, you know son!

   Elephant Career Woman Michiko : I married myself. I also cheated on myself. But, I can’t have kids because I’m too old! Nobody wants me!! Dareka! ONEGAI! MURA MURA! HAITE! (Said in unison with Elephant Hanako)

   There you have it folks, elephants living in a sexless, emasculating world, unable to achieve even a single erection to keep elephanty going.

   Let’s go over to the LGBTSNESNGCPSXN64XBX+ for their take on the situation.

   Elephant Girl Boss Judas : I totally want to be a mother one day!!

   Reporter : How, aren’t you genetically a man?

   Elephant Girl Boss Judas : Just because I don’t have a Barbie pouch like other women, doesn’t mean I can’t have kids, bigot! Do you want some tampons?! S,m,l, surprisingly they’re not for the sizes of your couche, they’re actually to control the flow.

   Reporter : Oh Gosh, why the fuck would anybody want to have kids in this day, and age?

   >Deliver them from the kingdom of darkness and bring them into the Kingdom of Your dear Son, Jesus Christ. And light in our hearts a passion to spread the gospel in this generation. Help us to do Your work while it is day before the night comes when no one can work.
   >
   >Father, we pray for the day when Christ will return in glory. We long to see Your Son, our King Jesus. Hasten the day when the kingdoms of this world will become the kingdom of our Lord and of His Christ, and He shall reign forever and ever (Revelation 11:15). Come defeat the enemies who are arrayed against You! Come judge the world in righteousness! Come and bring us safely into your presence to live under the blessing of Your rule!

5. I grew up in Japan, normalizing the captivity of animals until I started watching videos on YouTube about more open-space zoos in the other parts of the world.

   Then I had a chance to visit a zoo in Los Angeles where the space was as depressing as those in Japan if not worse. Sadge.