Hi. My partner has been offered a 2 years stint in Japan. I’m not sure if this is a good move as I’m afraid of what it would mean for my career. I am unable to work remotely in my industry. I also hate depending on him financially. Also not looking forward to being isolated and having unstructured days. I do not have rose tinted glasses of living overseas not working at all. Would like to hear from others who have experienced this
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Kind of related, kind of not, but her.atlas on YouTube was in a similar situation. Looks like her husband is in the US army or something and she came over as well. She was teaching English (I think?) at first but she’s managed to make a pretty good thing out of it and turned into a travel vlogger.
Sounds like you need to talk this through with your spouse because moving here will be a massive shift.
Is your spouse going to be on an expat package with everything that entails, like compensated, high-end, housing and country club membership? And how badly will not working effect your ability to re-enter your industry afterwards? Can you use the time to upgrade your skills, like sort of a sabbatical, or will it just be a wasted 2 years?
Hot take: if it’s a set two years, could he go alone and both of you just take vacations to see each other?
Where is your partner going to be living? Do you have any interests that are related to Japan?
There are ways to structure your days. You can go to free Japanese classes to meet friends. You can work part time as an English teach to get some extra cash and make friends. You can attend Japanese language school if you are interested in studying and make friends.
What is your career? That makes a big difference. Like my career wouldn’t really take a big hit if I took two years off. Some careers are more flexible then others.
Can you possibly do an online masters while you are there to advance your career?
My husband is the trailing spouse. Honestly it is rough. He’s having to basically start over with his career/look for different options because he lacks Japanese language skills. He has managed to structure his days with language classes, freelance English teaching, working out, and normal house/kid stuff. He’s beginning to make friends through language classes.
However, we chose to do this because it wasn’t a short stint, but a long term move that made sense for our family. We’ll reevaluate in five years.
When we were younger I spent two years in Japan and he stayed in the US. Yeah, we missed each other, but it was fine. We saw each other every six months and talked every day. It went by pretty fast.
You’re getting a free 2 year vacation in one of the most enjoyable, exciting and interesting countries in the world. Who cares if you have to depend on him? He’s the one making that decision – and as for unstructured days? Well, make some structure. Go out, explore, do something.
Offered or ordered? Plenty of spouses find jobs working on base. Overseas Spouses actually have hiring preference with the federal government, though you do have to be qualified for whatever you apply for.
Account name is Kagomechan86 and the account is over 6 months old. Seems like someone who might want to live in Japan for a stint.
I’m a trailing spouse with a masters degree from a top 20 university and 10+ years work experience. I basically started over. Everyone says I was extremely lucky to secure a job in Tokyo since I didn’t have Japanese proficiency. I’ve been working in a role I could have had my first year out of undergrad. I’ve been at it for 5-years and have lost out on a likely $ 2m+ over the 5-years we’ve been here.
On the other hand I work out everyday, take my kid to school, have a full time nanny, rent in a high rise is paid by my spouses company, free furniture rental, free car and parking spot. Life is pretty good. I thought it would 2/3 years and we’re looking at 6 now.
My advice is to decide if the experience of living abroad is worth taking a hiatus from your work. How far back will 2-years really set you back? Is there anything you would do with your time that you couldn’t before because you needed to work to pay bills? Don’t expect your career to be amazing here, but understand the sacrifice may be worth it in other aspects in your life.
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