how did you get over your nerves and start talking to native/experienced speakers?

hey all, begginer-intermediate learner here (jlpt n4 level)

my japanese has now reached a point where i think i could benefit a lot from more experience with casual conversations. i’m at a level where i feel like i can express most simple concepts i would in english, although far far slower and with much more deliberate thought required. i feel like if i were to find someone to talk to, i could improve my fluency quite a bit, and that to keep improving at a decent rate, i kind of have to.

the thing is, i’m also a pretty shy person, both irl and online, and while i have japanese friends and such i’m embarrassed to tell them i’m learning and actually try to use it with them, since cooking up a basic sentence takes me like 5 whole seconds (probably including a fair heaping of grammatical mistakes).

my question is, what helped you to get over this fear? how did you first start actually practicing speaking to other people? is there anywhere online you know of, whether text or voice based, that could allow you to use your japanese with someone in an environment that feels less threatening?

9 comments
  1. I’m in this discord, Haku’s Japanese Academy, and they have a Japanese-Only-Beginner channel, where people can post in Japanese, and it’s for beginners. This is for writing obviously.

  2. I just thought about all of the times I listened to a non-native English speaker doing their best to communicate and realized that I never thought they were dumb or got upset with them taking a long time to say what they wanted.
    So if the roles are reversed, why should I be scared to try speaking Japanese? It’s 99.9% in your head and you don’t actually have anything to worry about.
    My Japanese friend always told me, “Just try!”

  3. Installed Hello Talk like 3 months after I started. Writing sentences was a very careful process of studying each word and how they were conjugated. Still made mistakes and I will remember those to my grave.

    These days I can chat about basic stuff without looking up grammar but vocabulary is still an issue. This is still fully in text though but I learned English this way too.

  4. There’s language exchange apps, HelloTalk seems to be the most popular. Probably best to start over text to get used to outputting, it will be less daunting and you have more time to think.

    You’ll be fine after your first conversation because you realise nobody cares if you’re not fluent

  5. I know this is going to sound obvious and trite, but its 100% what most people need to do. Recondition yourself to understand that it’s ok to be corrected and ok to be wrong and bad at certain things.

    Personally, I try to expose myself to conflict pretty often so that I can experience those feelings we get when someone corrects us or talks down to us. Then, let it wash over you, and let it go. This helps build comfortability with the idea that our self image is not tied to our knowledge or what others think of us.

    This is not to say anyone will patronize or correct you, ever, but just that your perception of yourself will be better suited to making mistakes. The only real idiot is the idiot that never tried and never learned.

  6. Basically you gotta do it.

    Hire a tutor or find a language exchange partner.

    This is a safe environment. Don’t worry about mistakes.

  7. If you tell people you’re learning they will often be excited/interested and want to test your abilities. If you’re worried about not being able to hold a decent conversation you could instead start by talking to JP->EN beginners as they will be able to relate to what you’re experiencing, or you could get tutoring for conversation and practice with a teacher to build confidence and ability

  8. Hire a tutor on italki. It can less intimidating to work with someone who’s trained to speak with beginners. This is where I started and it helped me a lot.

    Also try Hello Talk. Everyone is learning together on there, so no one is going to laugh at your mistakes. And if someone does, you can always block them!

    But most importantly, recognize that you will make mistakes, and that’s ok and expected. I was an honor student when I was younger and absolutely hated being wrong. Language learning is different. You will be wrong on a regular basis for a long, long time, perhaps your entire life. Whether that holds you back or not is all about your mindset.

    Think about the non-native speakers who learned your native language as an adult. Do they speak your language perfectly? Even advanced Japanese-born English speakers who have lived in America for over a decade that I know still regularly mess up articles and plural form. My bilingual friend who’s a native Spanish speaker often forgets words and has to talk around them. But despite that, it’s not a problem at all and no one thinks twice when talking to them.

    Buuuuut if all else fails, you can always grab a beer and see if that helps with nerves.

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