Hi, I’ve been sending emails back and forth with an editor in Japan and we’ve been strictly using 「様」 to refer to each other.
However, yesterday I had my first face-to-face video meeting with said editor + some higher ups in the publishing company confirming we’ll be working together long-term. Since then, the editor has switched to 「\_\_\_さん」 when referring to me in the body of an email (the opening line of all the emails has remained 「\_\_\_様」 for obvious reasions).
I was wondering if I should also switch to 「さん」 when addressing him in the body of my emails, as sticking with 「様」 could be considered cold or distant now that we’ve met face-to-face?
3 comments
Personally, I like to keep formalities in my emails with business partners as they’re emails from my work with my team and their team copied as well, regardless of how long I’ve been working with them.
Maybe observe few more correspondence and decide?
If someone has called you さん and they’re not your superior then the chances are it’s fine to use さん to them too
First of all, if you are not Japanese there is going to be a lot of leeway as far as how you use さん/様 as a lot of formalities might be dropped. For myself as a non-Japanese working in Japan for 20 years, it is very rare for me to change from 様 to さん for someone outside of my company unless I have a very close relationship despite working with them for many years. There is always the concept of “inside” your company/department/relationship that creates a separation possibly needing 様. On the other hand there is the weirdness of dropping 様/さん from people in your company when talking to people of another company (partner). I can’t tell you what is right for you, it depends on your relationship. Your question is surprisingly difficult to answer…