I prefer to go to a school than self-study or learn with a private tutor. But I’m absolutely terrible at chatting, more so in a foreign language. I’d prefer not to find myself in a school with a method requiring a lot of talking from/between students (and I mean creative talking: having to come up with things to say, like random conversation with your hairdresser), as it may be too much stress to cope with. Any recommendation? Thanks!
3 comments
I was painfully shy and introverted when I was in Japan (early 20s). One book that helped me was How to Win friends and influence others. Just like language learning, it takes time and practice.
There are usually a lot of talking in groups so being a big introvert may mean you will struggle a lot. But personally I felt like I improved my communication skills along with my Japanese
My personal opinion about language schools / school language programs: a lot of the time both parties of the conversation struggle, and the struggle comes mostly from the language disability and less so from being introverted. That’s coming from me, an introvert.
You have mentioned the stress of talking with a real person, coming up with things to say can be difficult.
In a language program, you rarely get to talk to the instructor but spend most of your talking time talking with your peers, and I personally find the below situations frequent and extremely stressful:
* my partner was saying a bunch of wrong stuff/ accent is too thick to the point I just couldn’t make out what they were saying, and I was straining to engage myself and ask follow up questions to get a better understanding. I needed to ask otherwise I’d be just in the dark, but asking too much can hurt people’s feelings.
* I feel guilty when people say something wrong and I correct them in my mind. I am definitely not in a position to instruct or judge, but I couldn’t turn off that voice in my head.
* sometimes I feel funny as an adult talking about rudimentary topics. I try my best to remind myself eyes on the prize, but there are days I feel like I just can’t bring myself to care about “how many pencils are on the chair” or “this is a pen”.
* i was saying a sentence and I noticed something was off, I couldn’t help but ruminate every word and phrase in the back of my mind right afterwards. I felt some stress when that rumination was going on concurrently with me trying to listen to my partner speaking as I try my best to respect their time.
Many of these things went away when my peers and I were at a comfortable level and have enough vocab arsenals at our dispose. On the other hand, looking back I never knew I would feel that way when I was just studying by myself and being around others made me more aware. Compound with my personality, some of the issues might never go away no matter how good I get at the language, because I just tend to think/feel that way.
Well, it’s not a competition and you might find some of the above okay to cope with, just really think about what you are trying to get into. You have mentioned language schools in Japan- it depends on what kind of schools you have picked. Beginners levels are pretty homogeneous, but once you get to the higher levels there tend to be a great divide. Some schools focus on extracurricular activities, short-term programs, homestay programs, etc. and typically have slightly higher percentage of western students. Some schools focus on test-cramming, many of their students go to separate cram schools to get in Japanese universities—in which case you’ll be blessed with some very talented and diligent classmates, but also subject to the stress of competition and fear of being left out.
*disclaimer: I have not been in a Japanese language school myself.