Hi, I’m a little freaked out right now by what’s just happened — someone followed me (20sF) home from the conbini to my building today (after 9pm) after staring at me (checking me out) in the conbini and loitering outside (they had already paid and left with their things before it was my turn at the cashier) until I’d paid and emerged. This person made a U-turn back in the conbini’s direction only after I went in and firmly shut the door behind me.
What steps should I take after this? Notifying my landlord is a given, but who else could I turn to? University? I have no family here, and no friends who live locally. Not travelling after dark or by myself are not viable options for me.
Thank you.
15 comments
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Don’t go home if someone is following you. If you see them again call the police.
Why would you notify your landlord? Is there a camera in your building already? Other than that there’s nothing they can do.
The only people who could potentially do something are the police but they can’t do anything until something actually happens. If you’re ever in that situation again, walk towards the koban and tell them you’re being followed.
For what it’s worth, I was told by the police to call them if the person following me didn’t let up, and to not engage with them.
I’m sorry you have to deal with that. I think for now you have to be more vigilant about your home security, just because they already know where you live. Never forget to lock your doors, don’t leave packages in the open that might have your personal information like full name and address, keep curtains closed. Install a camera in your door if you can. But for later I agree with the other posters, you should NOT go home if you realize anybody is following you. Take a detour, go to a koban, or any other public place until they give up. It sucks, but it is more dangerous to let them know where you live.
Imagining you dropped your passmo and this guy found it. He picked it up and headed towards home, thinking he might drop it off at the nearest koban, doing his ichi nichi, ichi zen. Checking the back and reading the name, he decided to try to approach you (only foreign person in sight.)
Panick ensues as you are not only foreign and might not speak his native language, but are also really really pretty.
He follows a bit, trying to work up his confidence, practicing his best junior high English. But you walk fast and turn around to look at him a few times. He’s creeper status. Dang.
In the end, settling to return it to that koban, and totally missing the chance to approach the hot foreign girl. Forever alone…
Notifying the landlord isn’t going to do anything. It’s not their job to protect you.
You could talk to student services at the University, but I don’t think they can do much either.
If you see him again just notify the police.
If he’s following you/being creepy near a conbini just go inside and tell the staff a creepy guy is following you and ask them to call the police. I worked at a conbini (Lawson) for 3 years, there are actually rules in place for situations like that
Yeah never go straight home if someone is following you. While it’s understandable given you might have been panicked, all you’ve done is show the creep exactly where you live.
Best strategy when being followed is to go find an area with lots of people and walk those streets for a while, take lots of turns in to different streets etc, and find stores to go in and “look around”. If you can, identify any stores that might have more than one entrance/exit. You can go in to said store, then leave through the other exit and probably lose them completely in the process.
I know this is all sorts of hassle, and it absolutely shouldn’t be required; but when this shit does turn up, these are your best options.
If you are a student, which I gather you are, then you should contact someone in your university. Usually universities with international students (assuming that this applies to you) have student support staff who can help international students with things like this. Like if you want to go to the police but are concerned about language barriers or something they can probably help with that for example.
Whether or not they can actually help is an open question, but it doesn’t hurt to ask.
Don’t go home man. That’s 101.
A strange ojisan was following me literally yesterday and I took him on a stroll until I eventually sat down to which he turned around.
I think: it happened, for now dont freak. Keep on the look-out. Randomly being creepy is unfortunately something that you cannot protect yourself against very well after the fact.
ETA try to change route for a while and not pass the combini in question (where this man started right?) but walk differently to your home (e.g. a different street, past your home block on the back side, turn around and go towards the entrance from the opposite direction you usually would – you can see better if someone waited and you avoid the combini path). If you have a back-entrance option, use it. Also, vary time if you can.
also another strategy for this case that someone randomly targets you:
go back into the combini (like, oops forgot something) or into another combini. Combinis have cameras (and height measurement tools) at the door. Also, if he follows into the combini again or waits in front once more, you can be more certain that you need help and take more assertive action (like ask combini staff).
It is stupid, but having a phone and umbrella in hand apparently are also deterrents (so I heard, did not perfectly work for myself, but I still prefer it over nothing).
First, the lack of empathy on this thread is quite astonishing so let me start by saying I’m so sorry you experienced that and I’m glad you’re safe.
If it happens again, I would return to the combini and alert a female member of staff that someone is stalking you. A friend of mine did this, they called a manager to go outside and shoo the creep away or they’d be calling the police. He never hung around that combini again.
Others have suggested going to a koban, which I also second.
Make sure you play it safe at home for a while. Curtains closed, doors locked, don’t leave anything around that might identify you.
Unfortunately knowing any combinis or better yet the closest koban is your best option. The combini staff will call the gendarmes to discuss creeping with the fellow or if the koban is closer you can cut out the middle man.
Take a detour to the police station, hail a taxi, scream.
There are plenty of ways to get out of this, it’s just the fear is clouding your mind.
whats up with all the harsh responses? jesus
i’m sorry you’re dealing with this, i don’t have any advice to give but i dont blame you for going home. i wouldn’t have known what to do either.
I’d ask God for help:)