It’s been 3 years, I attended Japanese school twice. My current level is N3, I could survive in simple work environment like convenience store where I happen to work now. Or arrange all the documents needed here in Japan. But I can’t dive into any deep conversation with the native. My brother/ sister and dad are native Japanese as well. But I don’t live with them anymore.
I just can’t seem to learn the language. It’s been one of my hardest struggle.
I’m also really introverted, I sometimes think I just enjoyed the sense of not being part of anything. Or I don’t feel any enthusiasm with the language, maybe I enjoy the invisible walls that protects me from anything outside, like judgement.
I don’t know what to do.
This April i will continue my study for n2. But I seem not interested learning the language at all. I love japan so much, but despite of me being put in the situation of pressure, like last time I worked in a night job where I can use most of my speaking skills. Nothing works.
Nothing really works.