I ( 15F ) am moving to Japan with my dad, and I have many questions. Warning, kind of a long post.

10 comments

1. This is a copy of your post for archive/search purposes.

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   **I ( 15F ) am moving to Japan with my dad, and I have many questions. Warning, kind of a long post.**

   Hello! I have never posted on Reddit ( I’m a lurker. ) before, so I apologize for any formatting issues! I will give some context before asking any questions. My dad ( White collar worker. ) recently got a job opportunity in Japan and has decided to accept it. He will be getting a work Visa, and I will be moving with him since I am only 15 and cannot live independently in USA. I think this is an amazing opportunity for my dad, but I am very nervous. I really do not know a lot about Japan. I have taken an interest in some j-fashion subcultures, but besides that useless information, I do not know a lot about Japan. I asked my dad some questions, but he told me to stop being such a worry-wart.

   I have lived in the USA my entire life, and I am worried about what it will be like in a new country. My dad made me apply to a few international schools in Tokyo, and I was accepted into one, so I will attend school there after this years summer. My dad has been to Japan for previous work and has visited multiple areas, but I have only ever been to Japan once! My dad knows basic Japanese, but I know none. My dad said he is going to sign me up for classes before we move, and that I will continue to take Japanese language classes in Japan so I can learn, but I have very bad memory, and I am scared I will not be able to learn it well enough.

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   Here is a list of things I am worried over, and have questions about.

   1. What are international schools like in Japan? I barely know anything about international schools in general, to be honest. The school I was accepted into seems like a lovely school, but I feel like I need a general idea of what the environment at international schools are like there. I couldn’t find much about it online, and I would like to ask real people in Japan.
   2. How bad is racism in Japan really? I hear a lot of talk that the Japanese are xenophobic and racist towards foreigners, and hold prejudiced views against many. I do not know if this is true, but I have heard a lot of negative experiences from foreigners. I am mixed race, but not mixed with Asian or Japanese. My father is Native American and Irish, and my mother is Egyptian and Arab. I have pale skin, and I believe I am very racially ambiguous, I think. How much racism will I experience while living here, if at all? Does my race and skin tone even matter? Do they just treat all foreigners the same? Should I be scared?
   3. Will I be able to make friends in Japan? I am worried because I am a foreigner, that nobody my age will want to be my friend. I hope to make friends at the international school I will attend, but I am still very nervous that I will be excluded. I want to have friends, and I am already worried enough about moving away from my friends here. Will I be incapable of making friends? Do Japanese teens accept foreigners as friends or not? How accepting are teens my age in Japan?

   I’m sorry if some of these questions are seen as stupid questions. I am very, very anxious about this move. Japan is very different than what I am used to in USA, so I am anxiety-ridden. Helpful answers to any of my questions would be extremely appreciated..

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2. Since I’m Japanese, I won’t be able to give you helpful first-hand advice about racism in Japan, but I think I can answer questions 1 and 3 because I’ve attended multiple International schools in Japan.

   1.International schools (in Japan) are schools that have a western education system like the ones that you get in the US. Everything (except for foreign language classes) is in English, and teachers are mostly native or fluent English speakers. For example more than half of the teachers at mu school were from North America, and the rest were from Europe or Japan (but went to university in English-speaking countries). Although many Japanese students like myself attend International schools, a lot of students have international backgrounds, like kids whose parent(s) are foreigners who work in Japan or Japanese kids who were born abroad. I think the education system is similar to US private schools. You have schools that offer the IB curriculum as well as schools that offer the AP curriculum. This depends on the school. This allows students who graduate International schools to go to universities outside of Japan, like the US, Canada, or UK without much difficulties, though recently universities in Japan are also popular options.

   3.If you’re going to an International school, making friends will probably be way easier than if you’re going to a Japanese school, because international school students speak English and are used to people from different parts of the world. Don’t be afraid to talk to people or join club activities! Many of the friends that I keep in touch with almost a decade after graduation are from many different countries.

   I hope my answers have helped ease up your worries a little bit! It’s definitely going to be a pretty big change going from the US to Japan, but I hope you enjoy your time here!

3. I’m Japanese and went to local schools so I can’t help you with 1 and 2 but for 3, you’ll make friends at school who speak English so don’t worry about it. Most of your classmates will be foreigners just like you. Your life won’t be much different from what it’s like now.

4. I can’t speak to your situation specifically, but I think you’ll do fine. I’m Japanese American (born and raised in California) and never actually lived in Japan until I came here for high school when I was 16. While I was definitely a ninja Gaijin, I had no issues making friends, many of which I’m still very close friends with 20 years later. I was out in Aichi and honestly I felt like the foreign looking students almost had celebrity level status among the student body. Mostly for stupid stereotypical reasons, but I don’t think any of them had any issues integrating (besides the language barrier). As you’re going to an international school in Tokyo, I really don’t think you’ll have problems adapting and making friends. Most young people I know (university kids) definitely grew up in a different culture and society from people my age so I feel they’re much more accepting of others, and a lot of the kids at international schools are probably in the same boat as you. But your milage may vary.

   Advice I would give: keep an open mind, be willing to venture outside your comfort zone, and just be a good person.

   I think you’ll do fine 🙂

5. 1) International schools really vary in Japan. They range from incredible top tier educational facilities to… pretty useless places for parents with money to park their kids when the kids couldn’t get into a real school. Think charter schools in the US.

   2) I won’t say you won’t face any discrimination in Japan, but it is often overblown by posters online except for certain demographics – and those demographics face a lot of racism in the US, too. The racism in Japan is a lot less hostile than it is in the US. It’s more subtle. You shouldn’t be scared.

   3) You will absolutely be able to make friends. Many international schools will be full of kids just like you. Teens in Japan are very accepting, but the culture IS very different. Making Japanese friends might be difficult if you don’t speak the language, but you should be able to make friends at school.

   It’s natural to be anxious. Japan is very different from the US. It has some benefits over the US, and some aspects that are worse than the US. You don’t have to ignore the things that are making you anxious, but I highly recommend you look more into the things you find interesting about Japan and Japanese culture, and try to get excited about those things. You have a really incredible opportunity.

6. You are going to be popular because you’re exotic.

   This also means people will treat you like a novelty.

   They’ll want to talk to you and show you around once they’re comfortable.

   Even If you live there for a few years and master the language.

   You won’t be a victim of a hate crime. That isn’t the kind of racism you’ll experience.

   Worst case scenario you’ll be denied entry to a niche bar when you hit 20 and older someday. Or people may ask you seemingly rude questions out of ignorance.

   Look at this differently.

   You’re going. Sounds like it’s already in motion.

   It’s okay to be nervous. It’s a big change.

   Make the best of it.

   Many people would consider this a blessing.

   Make as many friends as you can, treat them well and many will be valuable friends for life.

   Try not to avoid the language. It’s difficult at first to adjust to learning a new language.

   Thankfully Japan is easy to live in with zero japanese knowledge.

   But don’t come out of this like many other foreign kids who don’t even bother.

   It’s an opportunity to learn a new skill that may help you later in life. Think of it as a chance to invest in your future self.

   There’s plenty of people who lived or were born abroad then returned to their family’s home country. Military kids, for example.

   None of that is sellable on a resume.

   Now if you actually acquired a distinct grasp of the language and any accolades while abroad, this shows character. That you were able to learn and thrive in a different environment.

   Even if you don’t, you’re going to have plenty opportunity to live a normal life in Japan for however long you’re there.

   You’ll be the cool foreign friend there, you’ll have some bragging rights when you move back home.

   Travel a bit, try an after-school club, embrace the food, and just make the best of it.

   You got this. You’re going to have a blast.

7. I think you will be fine. International schools are really American schools smack dab in the middle of Japan. There is a small town feel and most have been there their entire lives but will be open to new friends. For the most part, they will like things you like states side.

8. If you end up loving Japan, please make Japanese friends and start studying Japanese today if possible. I never attended an international school in Japan, but so taught at one. As for racism in my 4 and half years here (in the Us for grad school currently) racism has never been an issue for me. I am a white guy from the US and the general treatment of white gaijin is a lot better than darker skinned people. South East Asians, Indians, blacks, Hispanics, and people from the Middle East seem to have a much more difficult time here. I can’t speak for these people however l, as I am White and a male so my experience would be different. Japanese are not confrontational people, they typically talk behind ones back. Hope this helps.

9. don’t have any answers to your questions but i’m wishing you the best of luck !!

10. This might be just anecdotal, and I am in nagoya, but as another mixed native person I have never experienced any sort of racism or cruelty here. The most I have experienced is being stared at by kids sometimes since I live near a school. I am sure it will be okay, how exciting! I hope you enjoy tokyo !