Sorry if title sounds weird, english isn’t my first language and I’m bad at wording things!
I have this question because in my country, although very rarely, I get treated a bit weirdly about my appearance. I am 4’11 and basically look like a girl, a very higher pitched voice as well. I am extremely comfortable in my appearance. I think that the issue I have is manly I am scared of people being very weird to me.
I have experienced this in my male friends being very weird to me, like sexual remarks and those things make me highly uncomfortable. I am scared of telling people I am male and then it gets uncomfortable because I am so feminine. The thing I am trying to get at is that, will people treat me weird/will I become some sort of a sexual spectacle? Sorry if that is worded weird, I’m not sure how to word it. Thank you for any replies
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**Will I get treated weirdly for being a feminine gay man?**
Sorry if title sounds weird, english isn’t my first language and I’m bad at wording things!
I have this question because in my country, although very rarely, I get treated a bit weirdly about my appearance. I am 4’11 and basically look like a girl, a very higher pitched voice as well. I am extremely comfortable in my appearance. I think that the issue I have is manly I am scared of people being very weird to me.
I have experienced this in my male friends being very weird to me, like sexual remarks and those things make me highly uncomfortable. I am scared of telling people I am male and then it gets uncomfortable because I am so feminine. The thing I am trying to get at is that, will people treat me weird/will I become some sort of a sexual spectacle? Sorry if that is worded weird, I’m not sure how to word it. Thank you for any advice
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Honestly, a lot of heterosexual guys here are feminine compared to Western countries so it may not always stand out so much? Maybe I’ve been here too long but boybands still exist (and are popular), and they appear to have better skincare routines then some women (yeah I’m jealous, who wouldn’t) while dressing in sparkly matching costumes for concerts… so I wouldn’t worry too much.
If someone does treat you weird, cut them out of your life. There’s no need for that negative stress!
>I think that the issue I have is manly I am scared of people being very weird to me.
Bad news: People are going to treat your weirdly.
Good news: It will be because you’re a foreigner and *not* because of how you present yourself.
Japan is much more accepting of things like this than a lot of western countries. People will notice, sure. But they’re not going to make fun of you and/or abuse you because of it. It will just be chalked up to “Another odd foreigner”.
One thing that you should definitely be prepared for: Blunt questions. While strangers will leave you alone, friends/coworkers may end up asking questions about your appearance. And they will probably be fairly blunt about it, like coming straight out and asking “Why do you look like a girl?”
They’re not going to be asking as a preface to making fun of you, though. It’s just a quirk of how Japanese people interact with foreigners. And the fact that many times their English isn’t good enough to be subtle about it.
You can be comfortable being yourself in Japan, just be respectful and that’ll go a long way in most situations.
While a fellow foreigner will be able to tell you are gay, the Japanese just think you’re European.