Weekly Complaint Thread – 30 March 2023

As per every Thursday morning—this week’s complaint thread! Time to get anything off your chest that’s been bugging you or pissed you off.

​

Rules are simple—you can complain/moan/winge about anything you like, small or big. It can be a personal issue or a general thing, except politics. It’s all about getting it off your chest. Remain civil and be nice to other commenters (even try to help).

38 comments
  1. I hate that since I am looking up weight loss tips and workouts to help strengthen my core, I also get those Japanese targeted ads about girls who go to a clinic, get a shot, eat whatever they want and lose 16 kg thanks to the clinic.

    I know it’s too good to be true but I also feel lower than low some days and know if I was desperate I would be jumping to these places.

    It’s also frustrating cause I am doing home workouts (when I can), walking EVERYWHERE, watching what I eat when I can and with what I cook, bathing instead of showering to calm the body/fight inflammation, etc., but it’s still a struggle going down more than 1.5 kilo recently. I’m almost a full year postpartum, and the pics I take of myself I hate looking at so much. Shopping is a pain for me when I used to love going to Shimamura and GU and H&M.

    And I know realistically I’m not even that big but being here makes me feel bigger than I would in the states due to the sizing differences. I just am so frustrated.

    As another complaint I have a feeling my husband’s company didn’t raise his wages as punishment for him taking paternal and parental leave, since normally we know the upcoming yearly wage by March. He has heard nothing. He says he doesn’t care since we are working on heading back but he also needs my new job wages to help him catch up so….he should care a little imo.

  2. Ive been struggling with my mental health here. I know a lot of it is overblown due to culture shock and my anxiety etc. But I feel like ive lost my self confidence completely. I have a brown tanned skin complexion and im finding Japans obsession with skin color a bit hard. I admit some of my posts in the past have been overexaggerated and compulsive but I say this in my calmest state of mind that the colorism is getting to me. Its still a shock to me how just being a little darker just comes with so much. Im not even that dark yet a lot of people just assume im lowclass or a criminal because my skin is brown. Ive daily seenJapanese people especially construction workers who have much darker skin than me yet with me some Japanese people totally react overboard when they encounter me. Im skinny like a Japanese , but I stand out because I have big eyes, dark and am tall. In fact a lot of Japanese people like to tell me I almost look Japanese especially Jomon like but I just feel like such an alien.

    I admit I think I overthink and have misheard Japanese people many times l . But like I feel that Japanese people just love to point out my skintone as if i have no other qualities or they all of a sudden hide their personal belongings if they so much as glance at me. And no as many say , they not making space for me they are visibly hiding their things from me. Its really made me feel horrible about myself. I actually love Japan but I just wish Japanese people would see me as more than my skintone. Ive been told by Japanese people that I have a half Face but unfortunately its not half white but South Asian looking and judging by reactions people i dont think I have won the beauty jury over. Ive been around the US, south africa and Europe yet I have never experienced this much obsession with skin color. yes racism in other countries is more systematic but Japan is just wow. Many younger Japanese compliment me or are extra nice and to see models like Rola and darker Japanese like Kaito Takahashi being so popular is a little inspiring but still I just really have lost all my confidence here. I do love it here and believe or not but I really wish some Japanese people would look at my other qualities and features too instead of just pointing out my skin. It does get tiring , even one comment can ruin my whole day.

    Edit: I know a lot of people will say I should go home. I get why and yeah some days I feel like hopeless. But 1. I feel that its quite a big thing to go home. I cost my family a lot of money to move here and it would be a big thing to move back. Its a strange feeling , I feel comfortable here but at the same time some days I feel hopeless and like trash. Also I feel like I need to acknowledge that I have mental health issues here and I shouldnt pussy out. Reading other peoples stories

  3. TLDR; Wife’s feeling down because her family doesn’t want to come meet us.

    In the 5 years or so my wife and I have been living together her parents and sister’s family have never visited us. We live a little under an hour’s drive from them so really not that far.

    Lately we’ve been trying to have the come to us for a change. We came up with some ideas for GW but her mom and sister are nothing but negative.

    – Its too far (an hours drive, the same time we’d need to drive to go to them)

    – There will be traffic jams (there haven’t been any in the 5 years we’ve been driving to them, but even if there were, we’d have to sit in that traffic jam going to them)

    – Kids can’t sit in the car for an hour (okay I can understand this might not always be ideal but lets not act like a 3 and 1 year old can’t sit in a car a bit)

    – We’ll need to stay somewhere overnight (wtf? its an hours drive, why can’t you go back and forth the same day?)

    My wife’s feeling a bit down because, understandably, she feels like her mom and sister can’t be arsed meet.

    Maybe I should say something about it next time we see them but going by the LINE conversation my wife showed me it doesn’t seem they’d really get the point anyway.

  4. My husband and I have to do business trip at the same time. Having heard so much talk about gender equality promotion, I asked if temporary nusery for our child can be supported in the business trip. The answer is that we have to cover it by ourselves. Just realized why the birthrate here is freefalling.

  5. It’s 2:30 in the afternoon and the Ginza line is packed like rush hour. Wtf?

  6. I had my butt fondled on the Chuo Line last week and my son witnessed it. I didn’t know what to say to him. I hate it how these weird things happen in Tokyo for which there’s no playbook response to draw on.

  7. The laundromat near me if charging ¥1200 for a single load. I just want to wash my blanket but the washing machine I have is too small to fit it

  8. Fucking idiots in the outsourced salary payment company, for the last salary they decided to deduct full residence tax, like I was leaving Japan. I forgot to tell them before hand that do not do it, my next company will continue paying the residence tax as is.

    I don’t know why on earth this is still default in some of the companies. It’s really only meant for peeps bailing out. They perfectly know I have a PR, mortgage, wife, kid… I’m not going anywhere.

  9. As always Kyoto is gorgeous this time of the year but I forgot how much the tourists fuck up the experience.

    Tetsugaku no Michi looking like Takeshita Dori.

  10. A vendor I work with always takes their sweet time getting back to me for processing order requests for our company, but when I sent a kind reminder email (3-5 days later…-_-), they suddenly up the pace and spam me back, wanting everything done ASAP.

    Like, you guys were the ones who sat on it for that long, you don’t suddenly get to act like I’m the one causing a delay.

    This happens every time.. too bad they’re by far the cheapest option for what we’re using.

    What you pay for is what you get, I guess. Lol

  11. A receptionist at my company has always been on the curt and unfriendly side. No matter how much I try to be nice towards her, she sort of gives me a cold shoulder. I’ve gotten used to it but, while I know we’re not here to make friends or something, if you’re getting complaints from clients for being rude, then perhaps a receptionist is not your type of job.

    Well, tomorrow is her last day since she’s quitting. I don’t know if she just doesn’t care anymore but she’s been icy cold the past few days. And just plain being a bitch. Hanging up on a client. *Not* answering the phone. Refusing to do a task or plain hikitsugi work. Giving the cold shoulder to mostly everyone. Telling a shinsotsu that they’re dumb for not being able to do a task that they haven’t been trained yet.

    Honestly, I’m fucking glad she’ll be gone soon.

  12. Sitting at a cafe getting some work done when the afternoon sun finally starts shining in. Felt so good on my back. And then they close the blinds after like 5 minutes…

    People also need to stop slamming down on their keyboards. Really, there’s nothing impressive about typing 田中様 いつもお世話になっております for the millionth time.

  13. My boss has been a pain in the ass, saying I’m not good for my work environment but always wants my opinion on subjects he doesn’t know (and I’m an expert on it).
    I’m tired and feeling harassed, and today, after a meeting, I’m thinking about quitting (BUT, I’ll need to go back to my home country, and I don’t think I’m super prepared for it + home contract of 2yo)

  14. If I’m riding my bike around my local station and see something in a shop window that I just want to pop in and buy, I am supposed to first find a bicycle parking area.

    The only problem is that to park my bike, I will need to ride three blocks, get a ticket and walk my bike up the stairs to park, walk back down, walk three blocks back to the shop, buy the item and then walk three blocks back to the parking area, and then go up to get my bike.

    It’s just too annoying.

    No wonder local shopping streets are dying, it’s easier just to get it on Amazon.

    I understand that there is a need to control bike parking, but looking around my local station, there are dozens of empty places where they could allow temporary bike parking. They could even have people mark bikes and remove them if they are left there for longer than 24 hours.

    I can distinctly remember around 15 years ago in Kichijoji where they allowed bike parking all along the bus street on the North side of the station. My friends and I would ride our bikes there and drink in the bars. Then, suddenly they banned bike parking along that street so my friends and I would just drink at home or in the park as it was easier.

    No wonder local businesses are struggling.

  15. Partly my fault, but I received a call from an unknown number today. Like the rest, I ignore it. As I’m heading out, I check the mailbox. There is a slip saying a delivery was attempted. So, apparently ringing the doorbell is no longer the strategy to confirm if you’re home or not now.

  16. So many trashes in the mountain and forests.
    It’s just sad to see that every time I am going for a hike.

    A small and old road going through the mountain..mountains of trash.
    A small path of green..more trashes.

    Without the elder volunteers to do daily cleaning, a local parc would be trash land.

    People hate nature.

  17. Im so tired I just poured the instant coffee from the stick into the trash instead of the coffee cup

  18. Children making noise in enclosed spaces is like a hot poker being shoved in my ears and scorching my temporal lobe. Literally painful like a headache.

  19. In my medium sized business building we share the toilet and the kitchen area. An attorney moved in next door about a year ago. His nick name among me and my coworkers is garagara pe man.

    He’s always either hacking up a lung or doing mouthwash in the kitchen area. I can smell his mouthwash throughout the second floor where we work. Everyone can hear him gargle and hack and spit out the contents of his mouth.

    Garagara pe man leaves his person dental hygiene tools in the kitchen area. His mouthwash is often left there, his used disposable micro pipe cleaner looking brushes he uses to clean between his teeth are often forgotten and placed next to the sink.

    Our floor is open to the outside. As such the shared toilet is often very hot and humid in summer. Garagara pe man keeps turning on the heated toilet seat. It’s one of the most disgusting feelings to sit on a toilet seat that is very hot when you yourself are hot and sweaty. Needless to say I turn it off but it always goes back on.

    I can’t say I’m a huge fan of garagara pe man. I have wanted to write about garagara pe man fair a really long time. Finally today was my day.

  20. December was ¥5,500, January was ¥7,000 but finally the February gas and electricity bill came and it’s ¥15,000… I am scared for next month 🙁

  21. Dumped boiling hot coffee all over myself before being grilled not once but twice at work. Today was ASS

  22. I know this has been discussed a million times but being told my nihongo is jouzu after saying all of the four syllables of “konnichiha” when walking in a shop annoys me, even though the intentions are good.

    Very very mild complaint, I know…

  23. Been friends (me female and 1 male and 1 female) for a few years so naturally, I asked to hang out. He said no because he doesn’t like to do said activity. One week later I find out both friends did said activity together. I feel… absolutely horrible and hurt. (They’re Japanese and I’m a foreigner) it hurt my feelings because sometimes we have lunch together so I thought we were good friends. It’s times like this where I’m reminded I will always be the odd one out. Before anyone says they’re seeing each other, they’re not because she’s happily married with a child.

    Edit: in case my comment was missed below, I added that her husband and child were also there. I know them and and I’m very friendly with them so that just added salt to my wound lol. So 100% no affairs of any sort. They’re all really good friends and have been so for quite some time.

  24. The news about the boat accident in Kyoto is just awful.

    Apparently the time between the guy steering at the back falling in, the crash into the rock and the guy standing up front being killed was just seconds. It’s so unbelievably sad.

  25. Hanami. It’s beautiful. I love it. But it means that I can’t run around the palace. Despite doing the detour, today some of my favourite things were:
    – people heads down on their phone paying zero attention
    – people in groups blocking the entire path
    – and my all time fave, people rapidly stepping backwards without looking behind them first (camera or phone in hand is a clue lol)

  26. Lately I’m generally feeling the kind of tired that I only feel after being up for more than 36 hours at a stretch. Or when I’m severely jetlagged. I really need a break.

  27. Renewing my visa for the first time and there’s been all sorts of problems. Been to immigration 3 times this week and a 4th tomorrow. Need a drink

  28. Would like to humbly request that at least one TV channel lays off the baseball, maybe they could have some kind of rota system because it’s great Japan won the baseball thing and all that and I wouldn’t want to take away the pleasure for baseball fans, but please can there be a break for the rest of us? Even if it’s just back-to-back re-runs of あおり運転 incidents?

  29. My air purifier has a very obvious light strip across the front of it to indicate activity.

    When everything is fine, the strip is blue. When it detects something unpleasant, one red light. When it’s offended by something, three red lights. When it’s utterly indignant, three frantic flashing red lights.

    The massive flashing red light strip goes haywire whenever I fart. I’m not sure what the function of this indicator is other than busywork and public humiliation.

  30. This is my last complaint so I’ll just say: people who have come here (or any other country) on a working holiday visa all the while keeping their job from back home do not get to comment on the struggles of those who don’t have that luxury.

    Like, I follow those girls who are on a WHV in Korea but they have youtube + their job from back home and once in a while they spend a full day working but they can afford so much more things than I could (renting cars for road trips, good airbnbs, even renting an apartment). And I came with a good amount of backup money.

    This makes for two completely different experiences and you have to be really dumb or really self-absorbed to not understand that.

    Invalidating other people’s experience is a shit thing to do anytime but when you haven’t had to go through half of what others have had to (job searching process, shit jobs/co-workers/managers, different work culture etc) and you’re living on your cushy salary but in another country, it’s just inconsiderate asshole behavior.

    Anyway. On to the rest of my life now!

  31. I got my blood drawn today for a diagnostic procedure and everything felt normal until I noticed a tingling in the palm of my hand (same arm they stuck) when touched. It’s been over 8 hours and it hasn’t gone away. It feels like the prickles you get when you knock your elbow/arm has fallen asleep. Most noticeable when I move my thumb around or touch or brush my palm against something. All the times I’ve gotten blood drawn in my life and this has never happened. I’m hoping its gone by morning. I’m wondering if they somehow stuck/damaged a nerve …grumpy cause now everything I touch feels like a prickly pinecone…

Leave a Reply
You May Also Like