Random young Japanese guy approached me in Shibuya while I was shopping and tried to get me to go to a hotel…

I was in Shibuya today just looking for some cool shops, I’m a female and was alone just exploring and a guy stopped me and started speaking in Japanese, he was probably about 28ish and was quite attractive and then he started speaking in English and said my sunglasses were nice and asked where they were from, so i told him where I got them. He carried on talking and I awkwardly conversed as I continued to walk because i wanted to be polite – purposely not showing any interest besides being nice. Then he started asking if I wanted to go to a hotel to get a tea with him and I just made up some excuses saying I was busy, but he was quite persistent saying I could continue my shopping afterwards. He walked with me for a bit and asked if i was travelling alone, I said I was but I had a friend in town for work. I stood by my excuses because I’m an introvert and that was the last thing I wanted to do. I said i‘d just had a tea and then he said what about coffee and i said i’d had too much coffee, then he said you could just come to the hotel.. with that i just plainly said no and started walking away and he finally said ok and left me alone. Shortly after i left I ended up walking past him again and he was with a japanese girl, but I acted like I didn’t see them and i could see him from the corner of my eye pointing me out to her. I don’t know why, but i felt so annoyed by the encounter. I thought about it and thought it was weird that he was trying to get me to go to a hotel…. he seemed very specific and suspicious to me. I don’t know if I’m just being dramatic or not. I was wearing a covered up shirt and jeans, so i wasn’t giving off an energy of any kind, so maybe i‘m just paranoid from other horror stories I’ve read. But has anyone else had a similar situation happen to them? or have any idea what it could have been about? I’ve never had an experience like this in other cities..

16 comments
  1. You may also want to try asking in /r/Tokyo.

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  2. Yep, male Brit here. Been stalked by a young Japanese female in Asakusa. Literally following me everywhere until I quit and got into the underground. Very persistent, very awkward. It’s a Japanese thing I think.

  3. Sorry this happened to you. Obviously he was looking for a hookup and you are not wrong for being annoyed. I’ve been approached by guys in Shibuya too, but I never said anything beyond sumimasen or straight up just pretend I don’t hear anything at all, so they usually give up because there’s no conversation to be had. Take it as a lesson, Shibuya is full of sketchy guys like this. I think as the borders open and the crowd getting bigger than ever more and more guys like this appear (probably thinking they can get lucky with tourists OR are tourists themselves). I think you need to be less concerned about being nice, just immediately scurry away from strangers asking you personal things.

  4. Are you new to Japan? This is called nanpa and unfortunately it’s very common.

    These guys populate high foot traffic areas trying to pick up girls using a machine gun approach: they talk to hundreds until one agrees.

    Most of the time they’re just after quick sex, but it’s not uncommon for some of these to be scouts for the adult industry or worse.

  5. Maybe next time it reaches the “go to a hotel” stage, stop wasting time with excuses that you don’t owe him, and go straight to “no, leave me alone.”

  6. Dont worry about being nice and trust your intuition.

    I am not snob and I talked to many strangers but if they are being sketchy, i walk away.

  7. Reddit is biased in the anti-nanpa direction so take the comments with a grain of salt.

    That being said, nanpa should be respectful and mutually engaging. Sometimes it is; often it isn’t. If someone is making you uncomfortable, you don’t need excuses — get outta there unapologetically.

  8. That’s happened to me too.

    it was Xmas day 2022 in Osaka and I was waiting for my bf in the station when some guy approached me using English telling me I was his type and wanted to take me out …he kept insisting I go with him even when I said I was waiting for my boyfriend..!
    He kept insisting to go before my bf arrived at the station and honestly he wouldn’t back off!! his English was really basic so I used more difficult words and said I don’t know what he’s saying, then just ignored him..

    My best advice is don’t entertain them. Keep it short, keep refusing and walk away. Also use English (if they can’t speak it well) to your advantage!
    I think these people prey on foreigners because we are always polite and don’t want to cause a fuss, but from experience it makes us a target 😂 my motto is “shut it down asap and get away”! (I’m also an introvert and it gives me a lot of anxiety)

    It is pretty scary and uncomfortable but be careful if you think they’re following you, don’t show them where you live.. if that happens, best thing to do is go into the conbini and spend time in there and tell someone 😊

  9. Let’s see … last week there was the :

    naive woman with her staying out late and working 6 hours at the gym on Sundays husband post.

    Guy who wanted to find a place to work on his smelly wood block print of Jar-Jar Binks having his way with queen Amidala

    …and a couple others I can’t recall that smell of troll.

    They can’t catch them all but I want to thank the mods though for locking🔒and deleting such posts. Your job is very much appreciated!

  10. That’s what’s called a creep/nampa. And yes I’ve experienced it many times. Some are more creepy/pushy (literally grabbing you) than others

  11. Sorry you met a creep. Next time tell him to fuck off. You don’t owe any stranger your time or attention. Don’t try to be polite, don’t worry about being seen as rude. Maybe he was just a creep but he could be a scammer, a scout, a whackadoodle. His fee-fees mean nothing.

    If you’re not comfortable being so forward than something that works is just to pause, hold up your hand palm out in a STOP gesture and walk away silently.

  12. Why on earth are you telling a complete stranger that you are a single female traveling and staying alone?

  13. No one needs your help in these kind of busy area, simply ignore people who trying to talk to you.

    If they make you feel uncomfortable, tell them “go fuck yourself”.

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