Hello, If you are a foreigner, how does your interaction route go from the time you get a girl’s contact details like line ( may be in bar like hub, club, street etc?
Example – line – text and get to know like for a week – schedule a date- lunch / coffee – karaoke – etc ?
Happy to hear your tips and ideas and what’s working for you.
15 comments
It is extremely important that you negotiate the dowry with a girl’s father while smoking cigars before you initiate contact with her directly. The quality of the cigars matters.
Answer depends if there was any kokuhaku involved? Or you straight up asked asobi ni iku?
Firstly, it’s important to respect the other person’s boundaries and make sure that they are comfortable with the level of communication. It’s generally best to start with simple, friendly messages to establish a rapport, and then gradually move towards more personal conversations.
It’s important to keep the conversation interesting and engaging, and avoid coming across as too pushy or needy. Asking open-ended questions and actively listening to the other person’s responses can help keep the conversation flowing.
When it comes to scheduling a date, it’s best to suggest a specific activity or event, rather than just asking if they want to hang out. This shows that you have put some thought and effort into planning the date, and also gives the other person a clear idea of what to expect.
Ultimately, the key to successful interaction is to be respectful, genuine, and confident in yourself. If you approach the interaction with a positive attitude and a willingness to connect with the other person on a deeper level, you’ll be more likely to have a positive and enjoyable experience.
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Girl here, foreigner tho, been in Japan’s dating cesspool for 7 years.
I would say to take it easy. Everyone has their pace, and don’t force things. But it also depends on what you are looking for. Hooking up goes quite fast. I don’t think I have to explain it, but if you want something long-term, strap your boots, cowboy.
Usually, chatting on Line for a week and asking to see them on the weekend is normal. Two weeks at most before meeting, mostly so you don’t waste their or your time.
If you see they don’t reply to you promptly (aka once a day or once every two days), that means they are not interested. They could be busy with work too, but it is normal that they suddenly and unexpectedly stop communication if they are not interested. It will hurt but don’t take it personally. It’s just their way of avoiding confrontation.
This is all based on my dating history with men here in Tokyo, so it might differ a bit with women and with other redditor’s experiences.
Good luck, take it easy, protect your sanity, and be prepared to be hurt 👍🏻
This has always worked for me:
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3. Spend the night puking in the toilet.
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Not sure which country you are from, but I’d suggest just doing what you would do back home — treat them with respect and patience — they are independent thinkers all the same.
I simply point to my crotch and go from there.
If you’re at the HUB, you should be skipping right past the contact details and doing the dirty in a lavatory with no locks on the door while a crowd gathers outside to listen and shout advice.
I invite them to a local park, play on the swings, go really fast down the slide and stuff.
All right, since no one else is going to take this seriously…
If you’re on a dating app, chat on the app for about a week, give or take. You should have a fairly good conversation between likes and dislikes, hobbies and interests, and immediate plans. Suggest the two of you meet up for coffee, and then try to find a date that works. Coffee is low-impact so it’s easier to say yes to. Coffee does often turn into dinner, which is fine. If she likes alcohol, suggest a drink together. Don’t let the conversation over the dating app stagnate, but asking for a real-life meet too soon is also risky. Sometimes they may have it written in their profile if they’re up for meeting soon after matching. After meeting in person and if the vibe between you two is good enough, you can move things over to Line, or Instagram or whatever else the kids these days are using.
If in person at a bar/club…this one is kind of tricky. Bars…you should definitely be sending a message on the way home, saying it was good to meet and you hope to see her again soon. Start planning immediately. Theoretically at the bar you talked about the nature of a second meet – going out for drinks, food, events, etc. If not, be proactive and think of something you’d like to invite her to. If you got nothing, then lunch/dinner/drinks/whatever.
Certain bars, and most clubs…if you leave the venue with her contact info and nothing else, chances are slim that you will ever see her again. Especially at clubs. You can try to follow up but don’t expect much. For this reason most guys go for the all-or-nothing approach. Which is also a longshot, but hey, sometimes it works.
There is a very specific hand jutsu you have to master in order to court any Japanese person. Also it is mandatory you show off your Naruto run on the first date.
Like you would anywhere else.
If she’s given you her Line and then moved on with her friends, don’t get excited. She’s probably getting railed by the next chap she met (or the one after that) while they laugh at your messages of appreciation.
They’re not mythical creatures they’re just people like the people in any other country you might want to talk to