Hi all. I’m arriving in Japan to see my friend for a wedding and would love to greet the elders in the most proper way that google can’t teach you.
I still have a very strong Asian background (Chinese) and we call elders, auntie/uncle translated in Chinese. Is it the same for Japanese? Anything else to be aware meeting them?
4 comments
I hate to say this, but if you’re unlucky, the Chinese background itself is going to be the biggest issue with old people. Arguably one of the most important thing to be ready for.
Yeah unfortunately the sinophobia is real. I hope they’re tactful enough to not say anything off color, but old people don’t have filters
As far as respect/what to call them, last name-san is fine. Same as you would for anyone else. There’s no special greeting for elders. The “using kinship terms for unrelated elders as a term of respect” thing is pretty is pretty common across a lot of Asian cultures. It’s not as much a thing in Japan though. “Aunt” is just a generic word for a middle aged woman (and can even be kind of rude depending on the context). And “grandma” is the generic word for an elderly woman. Same for the male equivalents. It doesn’t necessarily convey deep respect the way it does in other cultures, nor is it really used in combination with their name like in other cultures. Last name-san is your best bet
Oh and not necessarily elder specific, but Japan is big on cleaning your plate. In other cultures, eating everything on your plate implies you’re still hungry and the host didn’t feed you enough. In Japan though, not finishing everything is seen as wasteful. Don’t force feed yourself if your full, but there’s no need to purposely leave food
By elders, do you mean your friends’ family members, such as their real uncles, aunts, grandparents, etc.?
Do you mean that you will greet your friend’s family members at the wedding banquet hall?
Even if you don’t know their names, you can say,
「はじめまして。【your friend’s last name】さん の 友人(ゆうじん)の【 your name 】です。本日(ほんじつ)は誠(まこと)におめでとうございます。」 / “Nice to meet you, I am [your name], a friend of [your friend’s first name].
I think it would be fine to just say congratulations on today.
You can add the following sentence to it.
「【your friend’s name】さんには、いつも仲良く(なかよく)していただいて感謝(かんしゃ)しています。」/”I appreciate it that he/she is always being a great friend. “
>I still have a very strong Asian background (Chinese)
Are you actually a Chinese from China? Or are you just ethnically Chinese but not from China? Big difference.