More of a confession than a question.
Being living and working in Japan for over six years, I felt that a large part of its initial “magic” was gone. Temples, gardens, futuristic monorails, and kaiten sushi restaurants are now just “okay”. Even traveling within the country became very repetitive as – to be 100% honest – nature is more or less the same across the main island of Honshu, temples are amazing but also quite similar and – after a while – you take the quality of service as granted and you are not feeling surprised or amazed at anything.
Similarly, walking down the busy streets of Tokyo heading to your workplace or a client meeting… You would rarely notice a futuristic building or a small izakaya and its centenarian owner patiently grilling yakitori.
Well, this feeling of mine changed a lot over the last month due to my elderly parents visiting me for their first time. Immediately after their arrival (even within the airport), I started seeing Japan…differently, (almost as a tourist again). I was surprised to see that I shared their enthusiasm looking at Omiyage stores in Asakusa or the excitement of entering an onsen warm spring with my father. Everything felt just more tense and colorful. The taste of the food, the yakiniku, the Tokyo bay view in Odaiba (that I have seen dozens of times before without any real enthusiasm) was now more than spectacular, the Tokyo tower by night was stunning and the trips to Disneysea, Kamakura, Nikko, Izu, Hakone, Kyoto and Nara were 100x times better than any trips I had there before (even during Covid time when domestic travel was dreamlike).
(Of course, I now have to deal with a mild depression due to their departure and the sudden realization that I have to go back to my normal routine, but I really appreciate every moment I spent with them while they were here).
So one piece of advice for those of you who have family/parents back home: Please, try to get them to visit you if possible and spend some time together. It took me over six years but they had the time of their lives and enjoyed every single moment (despite some problems in communication, etc). You will not regret it for sure.
9 comments
Great advice. It’s so much fun when you become the tour guide of your new home. It makes you realise how much you have learned and grown in your new environment
Losing the joy is a choice, not an inevitability. Keep your curiosity for life alive and you’ll always be amazed every single day.
Try understand more of local history may be a good option also. Knowing those things gave me a new point of view to myself while living here.
My family was in here last month and I took my niece out for sightseeing for 7/10 days they were here. That tourist feeling was amazing.
Going back home will probably give you your perspective back
Sadly, you picked Japan. You could have stayed wheverever your family is from.
Knowing you’ll miss birthdays, family gatherings, events, watching your parents grow old.
You knowing this still picked here, but you have a choice, you can leave, if you desire.
I picked japan because it is best for my son, for now. He gets a stipend, daycare paid for, etc. Back in the US we would be drowning in debt.
Yea it sucks being far away from my family l, but we are close to hers.
You saw Japan again from a different view but you need to decide what is best long term for yourself, and your family.
Are you seeking treatment for depression? When I’m at my most depressed it’s like viewing the world from a distant gray filter.
Exactly. I could’ve written this because the same thing happened to me when my parents visited us. They’ve been here twice and each time, I am reminded how LUCKY I am to be living in Japan.
Empathy. I got “secondhand” joy when I toured them around. It’s the same captivating emotion that people feel when they watch “reaction videos” on YouTube. The same reason why they’re popular.
You know what, actually after their second visit about 5 years ago, the “high” that I experienced as if I was in that honeymoon phase has lingered on. Today, I regularly feel that gratitude of living in such an affordable, peaceful, convenient place.
I walk around me town and realize how everything I need is a few steps from my doorstep. I cycle my neighborhood and see how clean everything is, how maintained the roads are, how humane the distance of stuff from homes. I buy groceries and marvel at the well-stocked shops, no drug-addicts fumbling about, screaming Karens, robberies, etc.
I love my country and I love it for so many other reasons, but it just cannot hold a candle to what Japan offers. I truly enjoy my life here. Much so, that I have stopped flying back home.
Just remember, Japan isn’t an amusement park. If you choose to live hear, make the most of your time and change your boring routine. There are always new things to learn and experience with the right attitude.