I thought Japanese people had a reputation of being polite, so I don’t understand why young, healthy, able bodied people keep stealing Priority Seats on the subway instead of offering it up to people who actually need to sit.
I have been using crutches for the past 3 months, but for some reason 90% of the time, people just sit on the Priority Seats without a care in the world. I would be standing in front of them, they’d see me, make eye contact, the gears inside their heads turn for a bit, then they proceed to go back to scrolling through their phones or whatever.
I can precisely count only 3 times that people have offered to give up their seats to me, and ironically they were all on the elderly side too.
I don’t mean to sound entitled, but in the previous countries I have lived in, people always stood up to give their seats for those in need (Elderly, Disabled, Injured, Pregnant etc), and even avoided sitting on Priority Seats even when the train was packed during rush hour so as to avoid the awkwardness of people actively asking for the seat.
Is there no such common courtesy in Japan? Is it not an unspoken rule or part of the education? Do Priority Seats not mean the same thing as in other countries? What’s the reason?
It’s quite a culture shock to me.
40 comments
The flaws of one generation are the failure of their parents. I have seen few youngsters offering their place to an elderly/pregnant women, but I also have seen more youngsters that didn’t care at all. It’s sad…
I think I’ve seen more people give up “regular” seats than Priority ones actually. Even if there is one free, and I’m standing in front of it, I won’t use it just incase someone gets on who genuinely needs it and I’d have to give it up anyhow. Of course, not everyone on those seats is immediately visible as a priority case, but they may have underlying conditions. Having said that, you have to assume a fair few just want to sit and aren’t going to give up their seat even if you are on crutches.
For some, the anonymity of trains can also mean they can let down their polite shield, no meaningful witnesses, no repercussions if you aren’t courteous.
Shiyat… I prefer to stand up. Between rush hour crowds and line changes, it’s too much of a pain in the ass to sit down anyway. When a seat vacates in front of me, there’s often either a startled look of disbelief, “You’re not gonna sit there?” or some douche feigning the empty seats proximity and angle to me and just sliding in and occasionally giving a slightly guilty side eye
Just sit on them. They’ll move.
> I thought japanese people had a reputation of being polite
Lmao
Happened to my wife’s 91 year old aunt this week on the train.only one woman got up to offer her seat while the rest just slept, ignored or simply didn’t want to look up.
Because you’re in central Tokyo, it’s hot, extremely busy, and young people often don’t and won’t care about you. Sorry you were sold that people are polite here.
Do you have the disability mark?
Of course you are on crutches it’s more than obvious you have difficulties to stand up but if you don’t have the disability mark they will somehow assume you are okay.
Than there is the “someone else” will/should give their seat instead of me effect.
Then some are just selfish.
Best things to do is, first to stand up in front of the priority seats, don’t stand in front of the doors or somewhere else, they will assume you are okay or will get out soon or whatever since you are not clearly indicating the priority seats interest you.
Second, ask. Pick up someone that obviously should not be seated there and ask for the seat. Be sure they don’t have a disability or pregnancy mark or whatever on them first.
When my wife was pregnant I did it all the time, and now I will still sometime point out to them if they “don’t notice” pregnant ladies or elderly people etc.. I’m front of them (if I’m standing, otherwise of course I give my seat).
Anecdotally, I remember seeing some young dude put his bags on the priority seats right in front of an elderly couple.
And no doubt we have all seen those situations during boarding when some salary man just slides in front of someone who needs it and grabs the seat.
These are the moments when you need some bitter old Japanese man to start shouting off.
That’s Tokyo for you. It happens often too! I witnessed a frail old lady struggling as the train moved, while holding on to the side railings at the entrance. Meanwhile, two young ladies sitting on priority seats next to the railing, completely ignored her.
First time?
Oh man there are sometimes nasty people on the train. I was with my wife who was visibly pregnant and she was about to take an available seat (not priority, a regular seat) and one young girl saw that and she literally ran to be first. Since it wasn’t a priority seat we didn’t make a noise, also we were shocked that some people would go extra mile to take a seat like that
I have seen a man in his 40-50s run and shove an elderly man out of the way to get a priority seat in Tokyo.
> to avoid the awkwardness of people actively asking for the seat.
I know it sucks and you shouldn’t have to ask for the seat, but have you tried?
You politely gaijin smash your way. Politely remind the person about the priority seats and ask them to move.
Priority seats are not reserved seats: I agree that they should be offered to those in need, but in a crowded train it is better if someone, anyone, just sits there to release some of the pressure to those standing.
I’ve had 0 good arms/hands for the last 6 months. I just lost my good hand for 3-12 more from surgery. I cannot hold the hand holds to balance and have to sit. Just walk up and tell someone sumimasen. I nornally pick a young health person trying to pretend they dont see me. Trust me they’ll move. A gentle tap of your shoe to their shin will make your point if they’re particularly oblivious.
I’m sorry you have to experience that while on crutch. Japan may be “projected” as a polite country but a-hole ppl is a-hole everywhere.
From the start of my pregnancy where I can only show the pink mark until my bump obviously shows on the 8th month along with my tired btch face I can count by my hands how many times I got offered seat, and sadly most of the time its not priority seats, as the ppl who sat there will just automatically shut their eyes and pretend to sleep. Also the worst is to realize that being pregnant wont get you any much sympathy from other woman, experienced this a lot in women’s only car train.
I know it might feel uncomfortable and unfair that u hv to do this, but try to ask the ppl on priority seats, even as simple as “sumimasen, suwatte ii desuka?” Even tho the chance they give you a seat is still 50/50 i hope you dont give up. Most ppl here are more ashamed that their ignorance or rejection to you attracts ruckus and other ppl attention and so they will give up the seat.
The same thing was happening when I was heavily pregnant.
Just ask someone directly.
While standing in front of them just start fake coughing really badly.
Remember that in Japan, if you call out someone’s rudeness/bad behavior, then you are creating conflict and can be seen as being even worse than the perp, because you’re escalating the unfortunate situation. I think this is why so many Japanese people ignore the signs and announcements regarding priority seating on the trains, because they’re counting on no one pointing out their error.
As a monster gaijin, it is my duty (and pleasure) to rectify the situation by asking such individuals to relinquish the priority seats to those in need and if they don’t move, then the scary foreigner will happily move them. Been doing so since ’00 and other than “sumimasen”s, I’ve never had further escalation or issues. This is one of the perks of holding a gaijin card. Play that shit like a Draw 4. 
My wife rarely gets offered these seats. She’s heavily pregnant and carries the badge. My reasoning is that those seats are asshole magnets. If you’re a dick without a conscience, those seats are often readily available. Just sit in them and go about your day. “Nice” able-bodied people don’t go anywhere near those seats.
I generally give people the benefit of the doubt. I don’t know their life story, and not all disabilities are readily apparent.
One that always sticks out in my mind: saw a perfectly regular looking young guy sitting in the priority seats on the Yamanote Line. No health mark and was just checking his phone. But when his stop came and he started walking to the door, he had that sort of hop-a-long gait. Never would have guessed it from just seeing him sitting there.
(IME though, people are pretty good even in Tokyo about giving up their seats to the elderly, or skootching over so friends/family can sit together)
People are the same everywhere.
For what it is worth, I’m here visiting and I always give up my seats to older people or those that look like they need it. Likewise, I had a younger guy give up his seat to me just yesterday (I’m perfectly able bodied) so that I could sit with my family and while he was able to find another seat, I did appreciate it. I certainly do not expect it ever here, but in USA it would not happen never, ever. I think we all have a tendency to remember the bad actors, not the many many good ones.
Just stand in front of them and ask really loudly so that everyone else stops and stares as well. I see older people do it all the time.
My elderly Japanese students always told me that they stand in front of a foreigner because they know a foreigner is more likely to give up their seat than a Japanese person
Obligatory, you can’t tell if they’re able bodied just by looking at them.
If you need the seat, say sumimasen loud enough for them to hear you. Most people aren’t going to just assume you need it.
I’m pregnant and 4 out of 5 times I’d get offered a seat. Which is nice. Some days when I don’t get offered a seat, I’d say “sumimasen” really loudly and on one occasion even put my hand in between their eyes and the phone as I repeated “sumimasen”
Beginning of my pregnancy I didn’t really care much if I wasn’t offered a seat but I’m really showing now, badge or no badge. And I’m gonna speak up when I see able bodied young men on those seats. I have no shame when I’m feeling like crap and my legs can hardly support the weight of my pregnant belly. I’d only gaman if the seats are all occupied by people who need them too.
People sitting in the priority seats probably already feel like they need it. You are much more likely to get a regular seat.
Probably not the case for all but they might have a non visible disability too
> I have been using crutches for the past 3 months
When I was recovering from a torn PCL, I had to wear a knee brace and use a cane. Amazing how many times my cane would accidentally land on top of a shoe when I had to stand in front of those seats.
And even then a few stubborn assholes would commit to feigning ignorance.
Osaka would give a slightly different result.
However priority isn’t a reserved seat.
While it becomes complicated Japan have designed those priority seat marks/badges for those who need, I’ve seen enough people giving up seats upon seeing someone with it m.
So I don’t really find a problem with anyone sitting. I can understand sometimes people are just tired from a taxing day or just have a bad day.
As has been pointed out in other threads, some oldies are extremely entitled and downright nasty people. They might be in stealth “nice helpless oldie” mode on the train. I’d be gutted if I gave up my seat on the train and then found out it was in fact a nasty oldie.
Related story: was one rapid train from New Chitose Airport and this old lady sat in the window seat and her roller carry-on was next to her blocking the other seat. This other man came and stood next to the empty seat staring daggers at the old lady. They made eye contact several time and no fucks was given by that old lady. She (thr younger one) eventually gave up and went to stand in the back.
I often see “being polite” being played as a game to appear as superior. It’s a means to control public perception of your persona, not the real you.
Those people are assholes.
Shame them into giving up their seat, ask them. It’s the only thing that works.
Oh get over yourself! It is the same all around the world – there are a lot of inconsiderate people everywhere. Unless you actually ask, a lot of people are not going to move.
I think in general Japan does pretty well. In which countries are people notably more considerate to others in society than Japan??
This situation lead to an assault. My wife and 6 month old baby son were on the Tokyo Tozai line. She was carrying him standing in front of the priority seat. Three young and healthy people sat in the priority seats and ignored her. A British guy standing nearby saw the situation and complained loudly in good Japanese about why they didn’t give their seat to the poor lady with the baby. He did this for a few stops. Eventually one of the guys got up and tried to exit the train. The British guy refused to make space for him. They bumped against each other and it turned into a pushing contest. Then the British guy hit the Japanese guy in the face.
He collapsed and a pool of blood spread across the floor of the train. This was Monzen Nakacho station. Someone pressed the emergency stop button. Sirens went off and soon the train was being swarmed by station staff. The British guy ran from the train onto the subway tracks and disappeared up the tunnel. I have no idea what happened after that. I checked the newspapers and there were no reports.
>I thought Japanese people had a reputation of being polite
That, my friend, is what we call a stereotype.
They are polite as far as peer pressure forces them to be, but most of it is a facade and a lot of people will do whatever the hell they want because, as with all facades, there is no actual meat behind all the sumimasens and gomens.
Imho, priority seats should’t exist and everyone should just give up seat to those who need it.