I’m female, living on the first floor. My apartment has a security system both at the entrance and on all my windows, it’s activated all the time when the windows are closed. My windows open to a small balcony, the balcony’s fence is surrounded by some bushes planted by my apartment company. And then there is a road, but not a big driving road, just one of those narrow ones you have when you walk into a neighbourhood.
Now, I like being comfy at home, so I often sit around in my underwear + a shirt, and if I have some stuff to do near windows, like hang up my laundry, I always wear a shirt.
Yet today, when I was hanging it up, a man passed right by my windows and looked SPECIFICALLY inside at me. So not just a glance at other people’s homes, but he kept looking, literally like one of those comedy scenes where you stare to the point where you don’t look at where you are driving anymore.
And you usually can’t even notice me or what I was wearing behind all the clothes and bushes etc.
I instantly stepped back and went to another room. And then I saw the same bloody guy DOING A U TURN on his bicycle and passing by my windows looking inside again. And then AGAIN.
And now I still occasionally see him.
It’s so frustrating. Why do I need to be conscious of what I wear even inside my own home. Anyways, just a rant + lesson learned here – do not live on the ground floor.
32 comments
I’m surprised the agent even let you pick a 1st floor room, we were never allowed to offer 1st (and sometimes 2nd) floor rooms to women, specifically for cases like this.
Hopefully he’ll never be back, but if he does come back, I would file a police report, get a camera facing the road, tell the landlord, or move out if he doesn’t stop coming.
[deleted]
If he keeps coming back, maybe the police can help. I’m not sure what they can do if he’s just riding by though.
As for the underwear issue, pajama pants/shorts might be a comfy alternative while the curtains are open. Definitely best to wear pants if you’re hanging clothes/futon outside, as the balcony/veranda is a very open space. Not only people passing, but other people in buildings around the area on higher floors probably have full view of that space.
Not that you should have to, but do you not have sheer curtains you can close? It sucks, but it stops people from peering in.
I know this will be downvoted but putting none seducing clothes on or at least going out with normal clothes instead of a shirt and just underwear will save you a ton of trouble; especially for you because you live in the first floor
There are inner curtains that you can see through, but people from outside cant. I would never consider living on the first floor of an apartment if I can help it so it’s another thing to think about in the future. Safety and don’t want folks having greater accessibility to me or what’s mine.
Super annoying and it shouldn’t be on you to change your behavior to ward off these CREEPS but until you feel safe/certain he’s gone again… Maybe try some Gelato Pique pajamas!! I really hate wearing pajama bottoms (I usually do the same as you, just a giant shirt) but honestly their “cool summer” collection is SO soft and airy it actually makes me prefer wearing them to not wearing them!! And then you can also treat yourself after such a bad experience lol. And be covered up/feel a little more comfortable.
Again not blaming u lol as a woman I know no matter what we do well get peeped on but maybe this would like mentally help a bit til you can move haha
This is an issue everywhere, unfortunately, but I think it’s worse in Japan since space is limited and most people hang clothes out on the balcony. It gives creepers a chance to guess about who is living there
My coworker had a neighbor who used to wait in his front window for her to walk to the station every morning. When he started taking pictures of her, she got the police involved. They went to talk to him about not being such a menace. If he comes back, dont feel bad about ringing the cops.
Was watching old people TV the other day about how to cool down your house naturally and one thing they mentioned was a Sudare (https://amzn.asia/d/ec7tZVj). They sell hangers for these bad babies at Daisos and stuff that go OUTSIDE your window/glass door above or on the frame. You can clip the end to the edge of your balcony, too, to make a tenting effect. Not only will it get peeping Tomo off your back, you get the added benefit of a 3% cooler room.
Do you not have net curtains?
You can get privacy film for the window or net curtain. And/or try screaming fuck off at him as loud as you can
Non-see through curtains closed at all times/heavier blackout ones that don’t show silhouettes for nighttime, and avoid flowery or otherwise stereotypically “girly” patterned ones. Don’t hang any undergarments to dry outside. If it were me I wouldn’t hang *any* laundry at all outside for the time being. Keep windows closed so your security system is on 24/7.
It sucks but the tropes are real for a reason. Unfortunately these precautions are considered so commonsensical to do that creeps may blame a woman who doesn’t take these precautions for their own crimes. They also prey on women who do all these things, but just don’t make things easier for them. Because you don’t know who may be just an opportunist and hopefully move on after you take precautions, vs. someone *totally* off the deep end. Rare, but women *have* been assualted here for less. Please stay safe!
If you see the guy again, go to your neighborhood police station and file a report asap. No need to explain what you’re wearing, since it is not the point.
I would also very visibly hang men clothes/underwear to dry. The old tale is true. It tends to be a pretty effective repellent.
If you see him again take a picture of him and show police
Get a laser pointer
In Japan people especially women dress modestly
When I first came to Japan I lived with my then Japanese girlfriend in a first floor apartment. She had a pair of her panties stolen from the washing line so it is definitely something you’ve got to be careful about. There are plenty of perverts in Japan so I’d keep your curtains shut when lounging in your underwear or buy non see-through curtain nets.
Yea I’ll never understand why some people choose to live on the ground floor. You get less sunlight, lose much more heat in winter, pests have easier access inside, and always have to keep the windows covered. Ground floors were usually had few thousand yen cheaper rent, but it’s never worth it. I’d consider it if it was half off in a relatively new building.
Do you have curtains? Get those white lace-y curtains that don’t allow people to see inside. I think they’re called “mirror curtains”. They let light in, but you can’t really see inside from outside. I also live on the first floor in a very similar sounding situation to you and I couldn’t imagine not having my mirror curtains always closed. I know it sucks not being able to look outside of you have a nice view though
Omg girl! No.1 rule of rent in Japan as a girl is never get the first floor. Also when I was looking for apartments the real state agent said she will automatically remove all the 1st floors because there was a protection policy in the agency to help girls be more safe. It’s a real problem here.
Also if you dry clothes do it inside or else maybe they will take your underwear or something.
Why does this get left up when the guy why was actually physically assaulted on the train got his thread shut down?
theres a house near us that alot of people passes by and they pur up a signage dont look here (with angry eyes drawn)
also they eventualybought a dog (maybe for safety)
coz theres also a warning signage for a dog
then i also notice they also put up a motion sensor light
you may want to consider doing the same?
Go to a local combini, get some men’s underwear a tshirt.
Hang it outside your window
Stopping to stare at someone interesting and stopping to look isn’t necessarily bad or nefarious. People sometimes get surprised at foreigners and just stare forgetting their manners.
The fact that he made back and forth passes in front of your window is a gigantic red flag, though. You should be cautious and call the police if you see the same person doing the same thing again. This sounds like behaivor from a maladjusted person, and they should be kept at home to keep society safe.
Sorry to hear about this creep and yourr experience but here in Singapore, we can be charged for being seen naked in our own homes.
The guy who cleans our building does that too, now i just close the window during cleaning time. The other day during an online meeting i turn around and see an obaachan just staring at me, inside my place (2nd floor, building has autolock…). Maybe the oh look a gaijin! ? Or in your case a pervert….
Call the cops, show them the video. If it escalates you’ll have a report history to work with
My first few years in Japan I was taken aback by how many of my female friends (expats and locals) had had guys standing by their windows or trying their apartment doors at night. I remember renting a place for a weekend away and having my then girlfriend refuse to stay as it was on the first floor.
After hearing some horror stories and taking an abundance of mental notes, the best advice I’ve come across is always lock your door at night and put the latch/chain on. Make it a subconscious habit, automatic enough to survive a drunken crawl home.
Get sheers to give you some privacy during the day, just remember that when the light is on inside at night they can see you, but you can’t see them.
Setup a GoPro by the video that you can activate when some comes snooping. Something wireless that you can fire up without having to get out of bed if you hear something. You can view the feed on your phone.
One woman shared that she kept some bear spray handy at home. Don’t carry it with you when you leave the house as the police are unlikely to be sympathetic if you get caught with it on your person. But that stuff when fired in the eyes of an attacker, through a window, or even out a letter box is gonna leave a mighty impression.
Never hang your underwear out to dry.
Also, some genius mentioned it already, but a powerful laser pointer is an oldie but a goodie defense against peeping toms.
I’d also keep my mobile phone handy and capture absolutely anything and everything out of the ordinary. Especially if you laser or bear spray someone. Even the most pixilated potato footage is likely enough evidence that you were afraid for your safety and took the action you did under the belief you were protecting yourself.
Hope that didn’t all sound overly condescending or patronizing. I’d appreciate it if you’d think of it more as someone regurgitating stuff they heard rather than someone trying to tell you what to do!!!
Stay safe 🙂
Purchase squirt gun
Fill with liquid ass
Next time you catch him peeping let the whole world know what an asshole he is before they can even see him…
Ask a male Japanese friend to yell ‘fuck off you bastard’ in Japanese in the best yakuza style they can do, record it on your phone and play that loudly in front of your open window if he returns.
Hey OP was this a one time thing or is the same person consistently coming back?
There’s definitely more of a peeping culture here, but I don’t think there’s anything you can do except close your curtains and be careful what you show when the curtains are open.
My neighbor and her daughter told me they came and looked in my window once when I was laying down watching YouTube on the sofa. They TOLD ME that’s what I was doing. They weren’t ashamed at all of looking in my windows. 🤷♂️