Hey y’all. I felt inspired to share this message with you guys.
I started learning 7 years ago and spent about 2 to 3 years actually studying hard to improve. But I eventually quit 2 years ago because learning felt like a chore and I didn’t enjoy doing it anymore.
Over time I’ve realized that my biggest mistake was to compare myself with other people on this sub. I started learning because I love Japanese but eventually stopped as I got discouraged by the words and accomplishments of others around here.
See, unless you are concretely looking to move to Japan and get a job there, learning the language is just a hobby. A hobby by definition is something that you do during your leisure time, something that nourrishes your soul and helps you cultivate positve emotions. Even if you don’t pursue your hobbies professionally they are still critical for our mental and emotional well being.
I forgot that learning was supposed to be fun and enjoyable. Because there were always people on this sub telling you that “they learned core 10k in about a year” or “managed to ace the N1 exam after only two years of studying”. There are also people who look down on others because they’re not learning “optimally”. That they should learn this way, use anki this way and not that way. It’s as if their level of profiency became an argument of authority which dismisses other ways of doing things.
I’m not here to complain, because that’s really not the point. I’m telling you that at some point because I was learning such a difficult language I would hate to waste my time. Nobody likes to waste right ? So I spent so much time down the rabbit holes learning about the best way to learn. I would discipline myself using anki everyday even if it was painful to use 90% of the time. I spent so much time reading light novels and playing games trying to learn as much as possible. What did I achieve ? About an N3 level. But it wasn’t enjoyable.
I thought that in order to learn, you need to discipline yourself and endure hardships. That is true. If you don’t have any discipline, you can’t achieve anything. The problem is that people seem to forget just like me that at the end of the day, learning a language is just a hobby.
When you have a clear and concise goal of where you want to go, meaning if you are truly looking to use japanese as a ressource to pay bills, truly understand your partner and improve your relationships with his/her familly or even live in Japan for an extended period of time, then yes, it’s important to treat learning differently in my opinion. You’ll spend more time learning and you’ll have to go through a lot of periods where you’d like to quit because it feels like you’re not making any progress. But learning Japanese is crucial as it will be something that you’ll need to be proficient at to achieve your other goals.
But for so many of us, I feel like we treat Japanese as something we need to become extremely proficient at simply because we feel like we need to. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not because it’s a hobby that it means we shouldn’t strive to become better and speak/write/read fluently. There’s true joy in achieving greatness and getting good at something you love.
However I missed the point throughout my learning process : Learning Japanese is a hobby. I do it because I love it. I have no deadlines, no future goal I absolutely need to reach, because the purpose of a hobby is the journey and not the destination. The purpose of engaging in a hobby is to unwind, have fun and do something that makes life worth living. It is the clear opposite of another hobby of mine which I turned into a work and that pays my bill. I need to engage in it daily in order to have food on the table. I very much enjoy it, but the mentality around it completely changed throughout my life.
Once again that doesn’t mean that you can’t aim to achieve let’s say the N1 exam. You can work towards it, but are you having fun ? Are you enjoying the process ? You probably can’t enjoy every step of the way, but is learning something that makes your life better or more stressful ? In my case I was stressed out, because I felt like I needed to become better. Because it seems that I fell into the trap of self image. I thought I would become more likeable and would be a better person to be around if I was speaking japanese.
So if you simply love Japanese, I would like to give you an advice I needed 5 years ago : There’s no rush. Enjoy it. You don’t have to be as productive as someone else. It’s not a race. You and you only determine what’s good for you and what makes your life enjoyable. Don’t compare yourself to people who improve quickly. Because we’re all different and there’s no secret to success : hard work. Most of us have day time jobs, relationships and we all live very different lives. We should strive for progress, not result and nurture a hobby that makes us happy. If you truly enjoy spending 2 hours a day on anki and it brings you so much joy then by all means keep doing so. Everyone is different and at the end of the day everyone is free and responsible to do whatever they want.
Thank you for reading. I wish you a great day. 🙂
edit : wording lol
9 comments
Meanwhile, there’s my N2 ass after 10 years in Japan.
I swear, the quirky perfectionism that draws many of us to Japanese also often sours it for us too. We need to enjoy it more like you say.
Thank you for your words !
I just started learning at my own pace as a hobby, but if I were to make a post about how I only use Wanikani and Genki (+ the occasionnal youtube video) for now, I would get quite a few people telling me I’m doing everything wrong and whatnot.
There’s nothing wrong with comparing your results to those of the people in this subreddit, you just gotta be selective.
For every poster who aces the JLPT N1 after a year of grinding Anki 24/7 there are hundreds who quit 3 chapters into Genki 1. Go with those guys instead.
I wanted to comment because I went through the same thing. For me, it was forcing myself through RTK at the very beginning because a lot of now-fluent Japanese speakers did so. I ended up quitting (unsurprisingly). So yes, you are right we should prioritize our own enjoyment first and foremost. For me, it was deciding to not learn kanjis despite the 152026 posts on how important it is to learn 2,000 kanjis because otherwise *YOU ARE NOT FLUENT*. I am working towards making the journey enjoyable for myself too (mostly by not forcing mysel through immersion content I do not enjoy). Your post made it more clear that I am on the right path, thank you so much.
I spend longer than 2 hours a day in anki and even longer than that in native material it certainly isn’t fun its a fucking grind, if i compared myself to others and came up short in that context i would be bummed but that’s the thing it isn’t a hobby for me its a prospective tool, im autistic with a lot of free time and want to learn it to a comfortable enough level as fast as possible because the things i am interested in are in Japanese.
Which is to say yeah completely right people are different, ultimately what counts is time spent that’s what separates N1 in 16 months vs N3 in 5 years and many don’t have the circumstances or the patience to put that in so why compare yourself to those that can and will.
Fine words here. I’ve been at it for 13 years. Lived in Japan for 4 of those years …and I’m 65, btw. I continue because of my dear 80 year old Japanese Friend and Teacher who I Skype with every 2 weeks to visit and to continue studies through the Minna no Nihongo series. I’m at the upper end of those books. It takes us a few months to get through a chapter. The proper Japanese is even driving her crazy, LOL, but we plug along. Studying has sustained our friendship through the miles. Her English matches my Japanese level, give or take a little, so we have gone to using the book to teach both of us. She translates the Japanese into English and visa versa. There are many days I’ve asked myself “why am I continuing to do this”. My American life is usually interrupted to study, especially since the time span since I lived there increases. But learning Japanese has become like a dear friend to me. The thought of not interrupting my American life to study and to meet with my Japanese Friend bi-monthly seems lonely. I count my blessings!!!
I don’t want to sound rude or smth but some of the language learning communities (not just on reddit) are fairly toxic and Japanese is one of them. And it’s one of the point that makes you without realising it comparing yourself to others because a lot of people are gatekeeping and so on so you wanna keep up with them.
Agreed 100%. I’ve been studying Japanese in some form for 20 years. It’s embarrassing to admit it’s been that long, honestly, because my skill level is not what you’d expect from someone studying for that long. But I only spend 30 min – 1 hour a day practicing, and only engage in Japanese media in Japanese when there’s no translation. I don’t read all my manga or visual novels in Japanese, like I “should”, because I engage in that media for fun, not studying. I’ve learned enough Japanese to have good enough comprehension and, while I am still always trying to improve, this pace works for me. Any time I’ve tried to push myself harder I get burnt out.