How to ask out on dating apps Japan

7 comments

1. Short term stuff? Probably using the wrong app.

2. From my understanding Pairs is usually more for long term stuff.
   You’d have more luck on Bumble I think. Tinder is really bad in my experience.

3. Seems like you’re overthinking this.

   After you message back and forth for a while and it seems to be going well, ask them if they want to go get lunch/dinner/ a coffee/ a drink.

   Don’t use it as your icebreaker or first message, but there is no set time period of number of messages. If you’ve gone through all the basics and seem to be hitting it off in general, people aren’t going to get scared off or offended for being asked on a date on a dating app.

   If you need an “in”, you can bring up food and drinks in conversation, and then pick up on something they like and suggest going to have whatever that is together.

4. Pairs is for more serious relationships but you should be able to ask a girl out to cafe asap. If it’s over a week then it prob won’t go anywhere.

   Girls get bombarded with guys messaging them on these apps since they don’t pay (usually)

   Asking them out for a drink will likely scare them away. Better to ask during 1st date setting up the next meetup

5. 2 days of playfully messaging sounds too long. Start with general questions and, once you see the conversation is going on naturally, ask her out for a coffee or a drink (I’d say ask her our for a walk but, considering the heat, it’s not a very smart idea).

6. Quantity over quality, message everyone, that will increase your odds and when u do take them out, you can slowly vet which ones you like or dont like and focus on the ones you really like

7. After you apply for a dating permit at the immigration office you can send the girl a やる招待書 and if it comes back hankoed then that means she accepts. If not then that means you need to get a lawyer and begin zenkon negotionations.