Weird experience with leave of absence for medical reason

Hello everyone,

To make it short on the context, my mother died in April from cancer diagnosed in January 2023 and I work for a big company in Japan. I went back to France in early february and I was allowed to work remotely in Japan while taking care of her until she died.

Before she died, I had some pressure from my manager as I was doing the “bare minimum” and should “take my job seriously”. But nothing too bad tbh. I asked what kind of leave I should take as I was really stressed out and depressed. (I was working from 4am to 1pm for my company, and was taking care of her/doing housework from 1pm to 11pm everyday). They told me that I should take PTO until the end of my PTO, then get back to work. I didn’t. That was probably a bad idea.

After she died, I got 5 days leave for mourning. As I was both depressed, stressed, unable to focus, and euphoric (weird, right), I went to see a doctor and he gave me one months off. The company accepted while being a little reticent, and I had an HR appointment explaining to me that the sickness allowance was difficult to get and that it’ll take 6 months to a year before I’ll see the money… Etc. As I had some money in bank, Ok, no problem.

After this 2 months out of work and no improvement in my condition, I’ve seen a psychiatrist that diagnosed me with Bipolar Disorder. Nice.

Since then, I’ve been prescribed 2 more months off with medication for me to stabilize my moods by my physician in Japan.

I then realized by searching by myself that the sickness allowance was done via a form, that I needed to submit for each leave period (nobody told me that, even when I asked explicitly).
I’ve contacted HR to told them about this, and they told me “yeah, right, of course, you should do that”. This is not good news, as my doctor in France is… In France, and I am in Japan now.

So, my questions are the following :
– Is it common for HR to do that? Like, keeping information secret… Etc
– My company is asking me money every month to pay taxes. Is it normal? (I don’t get why I have to pay this, as I do not make any money)
– Do you think they will make me eat shit when I come back after 3 month off ? I’m a bit stressed about that.

12 comments
  1. I don’t think they keep as a secret. Something i learned in japan after 10 years is that if u don’t ask explicitly for that paper they won’t tell you about it.

    sorry for ur loss

  2. * “My company is asking me money every month to pay taxes. Is it normal? (I don’t get why I have to pay this, as I do not make any money)” >> Is the company paying taxes or insurance? If insurance, yes you have to pay even if you’re not making money/getting hours from the company if they have you enrolled in an insurance scheme. If you normally work for them for 20+ hours a week, they are legally obligated to pay a portion (usually half) of your health and social insurance fee, and most companies deduct half from your paycheck. If you’re not making money, they still have to pay their half but will ask you to pay the other half since there is no paycheck to deduct it from. This is continue as long as you are employed with the company.

    I’m very sorry to hear about your mother, and yes it is depressing and stressful. It took me about 2 years to get over the depression I felt after my own mother died. My condolences.

  3. I’m so very sorry to hear about your mum. I’m not surprised you’re so depressed. I know it’s easy to say but try to focus on what matters. If your job are awful to you when you get back then try and find another job. Or else visit a doctor in Japan and try and get stress leave that way. Whatever happens, you don’t deserve to be treated like shit.

  4. If it’s a type of leave that’s paid by the government (as oppressed to the company), then you need to apply to the government – hence the company wouldn’t be directly involved. This is the case with, for example maternity leave.

    There are various things you need to pay if you are still employed, and some that you need to pay even if you aren’t still employed. Since you mentioned taxes, residence taxes are always paid based on last year’s earnings, and you might want to check if those are being deducted. Health insurance, etc., Aren’t tax, but are usually still deducted at a reduced rate. Pension fund payments are optional, f e. If you are overseas, but many people opt to keep paying to make it easier to hit their obligation in terms of years paid in, and increase their payout amount.

  5. > Is it common for HR to do that? Like, keeping information secret… Etc

    In my experience it is just incompetence. Soooo many people are utterly incompetent at their jobs. Moreso than in my home country, it feels like… maybe because they often transition people through various departments here? Maybe because what people do often has no connection to what they majored in? IDK, but I would guess incompetence rather than deliberately trying to hurt you.

    My condolences for your loss.

  6. > Is it common for HR to do that? Like, keeping information secret..

    Indifference and ineptitude rather than malice.

    Good luck on your journey to recovery!

    Ask your company for an explanation on the taxes. On my payslip each is broken out in gruesome detail.

  7. Ok so you were working in 2022 correct? Your residence tax is paid on your previous years income. That sounds like what HR is asking for, those residence tax payments they would normally deduct from your paycheck but, no paycheck.

  8. Sounds counterintuitive but contact the tax department directly. They are surprisingly helpful. I would also suggest contacting WeWork but, depending on the appropriate office, it can be a crap shoot. Finally, yet perhaps the best first step, contact a labour lawyer for advice.
    BTW, if there is any inheritance, run.

  9. I actually had to take one month and a half off from work at the end of 2022 also for mental health reasons and here is what I can tell you:

    1- regarding the tax, unfortunately as long as you are considered as an employee the company will have to pay the taxes so they will be deducted from your paycheck anyway…

    2- for the allowance, I think they are talking about the 傷病手当金 right ? It can take some time to receive it but just ask for it. You needed to take this time for yourself, you’ve been sorting until then so you shouldn’t stop yourself from asking for it. You have to fill one form for each month of your leave and one form needs to be filled in by you, your doctor and your company. I also work in a big company so I just had to fill my part, my doctor hers and after I just gave it to my HR who send it to the 健康組合 for them to fill their part. I applied for it mid-February and received it end of march.

    It’s japan so every procedure can take some time and you need to write many papers but as I wrote earlier, if you work in Japan you’ve probably busted your ass at work and gave yourself 100% to your company. Even if you do not need this money, you deserve it!

    Take care of yourself, you only have one body and now your health should be your first priority ♡
    If you do not feel good in your company when you come back, you can still ask for the allowance so don’t worry about that ~

    I hope this can make you feel better!
    Bon courage et mes sincères condoléances

  10. I’m sorry for your loss. It sounds like a really tough experience all round.

    I lost my father earlier this year. I took about a month of unplanned absence, although I worked remotely for all but one week, the week when he passed.

    Part of me wishes that work had been more supportive in an up-front way (don’t worry about this, we’ll deal with that, and so on). I think that in my company’s case, it was more just a lack of collegiate responsibility (who else can deal with my stuff? There’s certainly no obvious contender) and the left hand not knowing what the right hand was doing (it would have been nice to send one email informing everyone of my absence, rather than 400).

    I don’t know if this is relevant in your case, but many lower level staff in my company “rotate” in April, meaning that they’re basically new to their jobs. They might not have much of a clue what they’re doing.

    On the other hand, everyone at my work has been individually pretty kind and supportive, aside from one off-note comment that my absence had been pretty hard on someone else. Which I ignored, because if I’m honest I find it really hard to care too much about work at the moment. I’m working as hard as I always do, but what more do you expect me to do, y’know?

    You’ve just been through something really hard that throws everyone off balance in totally different and unpredictable ways. I think I’m still kind of in shock, personally. Be kind to yourself, and remember that there are other jobs if you feel this one isn’t supporting you.

  11. Thank you all for your great answers !

    I’m glad to have made this post, as I understand now that the Labour dept of my company is trying to help me out. There is no malice in their intent, probably just some lost in translation stuff, and maybe some sparkles of incompetence (that is fueled by my own lack of knowledge/misconception of the system, being used to the “easy” French way).

    As for the pressures and stuff, we’ll see when I get back to work if it was some kind of omen, or just my view on things that is not relevant in a Japanese context. It’s been a year since I am here, and it has been a challenging multicultural environment to say the least. I can be really narrow-minded from time to time, and with a lot being lost in translation, it’s even more complicated to adapt.

    Anyway, thanks! 🙂

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