Remember using it a few years ago and it felt like any other dating app. Nowadays it’s very weird. 80% of people have only pictures of food or landscapes, then obviously fake profiles that try to bait guys or キャバ girls trying to fish for new customers. A lot of people write crap like “あまLikeしません”, “Super Like以外は返事しません”, “使い方わかりません”, thank people for reaching some likes milestone, or state that they’re not even the person in their pictures, but they look similar to it.
I’m using multiple apps here and with Tinder, I get virtually no matches at all. If I’m lucky maybe something like 1 in 2 weeks. On the other hand on Bumble or other apps, I’m at around 1\~2 a day. Even tried *PlAtiNuM* which gives you the priority likes thing that you show up ahead of non-platinum users, and still nothing. Platinum/Gold also means I can see when someone likes me, and that happens… never. In entire Tokyo, not a single person swipes right on me? (I am also not shadow-banned, have professionally taken pictures, and speak fluent Japanese.)
So maybe I’m just considered ugly here, but looking at other apps, it’s really just Tinder, and only here in Japan. So I hope that’s not the reason lol
What’s your experience?
28 comments
1. People value their privacy more here.
2. People who are cheating on their partner don’t want to put their real pic on a hookup site.
3. Why do you think people here would consider you ‘ugly’?
To be honeset it might not be the case.
What I have seen from experience is that you can just be losing on apps, but in person you can be killing it.
It could be a list of reasons as to why it is not working for you. Anywhere from pictures, profile, etc etc.
So I wold say, just keep messing around with things until you find something that works and look for profile examples online.
Walk around Ginza or something until you see a really fancy parked car like some modded porsche and then ask someone to take a photo of you next to it. Then use that photo as your display pic. My likes went through the roof after doing that.
Yesterday, one of my JHS students suggested me to use Tinder, so there must be some merit to using it lol
I think it’s trash, bumble is good!
You’re insisting you’re not shadow banned but… you might be grouped into a certain bucket.
I’ve seen this with other apps, friends who sign up roughly the same time and who are shown vastly different kinds of people than me. It might be something as simple as age segmentation, but I imagine it’s hard to figure that out from the outside.
Personally I found Tinder to be a crapshoot for serious stuff though. CMB or the like was much more effective (YMMV of course)
I get all my ass on bumble….
I got banned super quick on tinder haha
IDK, the 2 of my kids who are “dating” and “mating” seem to be doing rather well with Tinder…
Although one did comment that he didn’t want to put a picture of his face on his profile so YMMV?
Have you tried being young and attractive? Although I’m still trying to figure out how he gets so many likes when they can’t see he’s you know, attractive… Maybe they like the mystery? Maybe it’s just that he’s 190cm tall? Maybe it’s the shirtless pic of his swimmers physique with washboard abs? Seriously someone fill me in on this I’m at a complete loss.
Tinder has a rep as a sketchy hook up app I think. Most people don’t wanna be associated with it anymore.
I think a lot of it depends on location. I’m in an area where both Tinder and Bumble are 90% tourists or people in nearby prefectures since I needed to set the maximum range just to even get people to show up. It’s probably easier for me to just go to a bar.
LOL Tinder is trash in Japan, its more of a trashy hookup app here compared to overseas (so a lot of married people, cheaters etc. etc). As a result people don’t want to show their faces and real info on it, but if you aren’t getting a single match then there must be something up with your profile. In Tokyo it should be blowing up.
I (M45) used Tinder a few years ago, didn’t pay (or maybe did for a month). I got a few hits, shared a few messages. I think I only went on one date, but I chatted to quite a few people.
My collegue (M 20s) just showed me the technique at the time was to basically set up a search the spam swipe everyone. If someone had a similar search, i.e. in the some locale hit then you’d just check out the profile.
I think that is broadly the technique a lot of people are using, they are not searching, just taking hits and following through on those.
It’s trash, get bumble. Night and day difference
It’s trash.
Bumble gives higher quality matches for sure.
Idk how they are used here, but tinder gave nothing interesting, but bumble I met several really nice girls. It’s interesting because there’s a clear differentiation in Japan between them but in Korea they are basically the same but bumble has more foreigners.
Nah just trash. Bumble seems better.
Tinder went to shit after the pandemic ended. I had my fill of fun on it 2020-2021 with at least one date every week. Recently tried it again the last two weeks with zero matches and zero likes. Went from 100mp to 0mph real quick.
Bumble has been trash for me before, during, and after the pandemic.
Tinder is just a trash app. I used it years ago when dating apps was still kinda new.
It was a simple app that matched you with people and it worked.
Now it’s a pay-to-win, bot infested, algorithmic wasteland and that was about 3 years ago when I last used it. I can’t even imagine how it would be now.
I feel like you just have to be trying everything at once. If you are not matching online then you have to meet people in person in group environments.
I have been on Bumble for 3 months with 0 match’s but if I go out and talk to people I will always get a few line and IG connections. Nothing has lead to anything but at least I have some really nice talks.
I’m no catch either 29 White American from tristate area, 168cm on my tippy toes and 135lbs soaking wet also loosing my hair fast. But I’m really good at talking with people and getting them to share their interest. I’m very new to the dating game but if I have learned anything charisma goes a long way and it’s extremely difficult to convey that through texting in my experience.
I was a Tinder fiend from 2015 roughly until the pandemic. It was great for me back then but unfortunately my account with 2000+ matches got banned and on new accounts it’s never been the same again. Nowadays I get basically zero likes despite still getting as many as I ever did on Bumble and Hinge. I’ve moved on to those exclusively now.
Trash. A lot of (bot/fake?) accounts are the same pattern: 2 photos (cute/pretty for sure, usually hiding the face behind the phone), no info.
I have 23 likes, but I’m pretty sure most of them are bots/fakes (tried paying once only for one week, and that’s what it was at the time with those likes).
It was great for a spam of about a year a decade ago lol
I’ve shared this here before, but I met my husband on Tinder! I noticed a couple of people on their profile, at least from my side as a female, said they were specifically just looking for friends to meet up and drink with. I was like, well, that sounds fun too so why not? I swiped right on my now husband and found out we were a match. I didn’t have too-serious intentions outside of meeting for some drinks when he messaged me first soon after the match, but now I’m married and we have a child on the way lol! We’ve been together for 4.5 years and married for 2 (married fairly quickly after 2 years to close the international distance).
I think a lot of success is just purely chance. We all meet each other by chance. I know a guy friend who found his long-term girlfriend here (now living together) from these kind of apps too, but that was also luck. I noticed a comment here mentioned age, and I will say that I was 21 and my husband was 24 when we met on tinder. There’s a lot of factors but I believe there is always someone out there for someone, the timing just has to be right.
Unless you’re paying for bumble/tinder boost it’s hard to get matches when there’s maybe millions on the app. I’ve had much better success with dates and meeting people going out on weekends to bars or meet-ups (not the massive all you can drink ones).
Tinder is legit terrible and not worth using, but some of what you’re describing is kinda universal on apps in Japan.
There’s still somewhat of a stigma (real or imagined) for Japanese girls about using apps, lots of girls are afraid of their friends/co-workers finding them and hence the random pictures of food and animals on their profiles.
Also pretty much every app these days is so monetized that you basically can’t use them without paying at least some of the time. It’s pretty depressing compared to a few years ago.
I met my wife through tinder about 6 years ago. That’s when it was free and not shit though. Agree with other people, it’s really less hookuppy as Tinder in most other countries, but I think that’s more a reflection to how Japanese people navigate social media apps and a reflection of their increasingly sexless society. There’s some stat about how Japanese youths are basically having the least sex of any culture in the world, a lot of them even not bothering to pursue relationships so yeah… If it’s hook ups your after, or even easy to find relationships, maybe the wrong country.. (I was actually surprised to have had trouble initially in Japan to find partners, although I’ve never had problems finding relationships in any country I’ve lived in or even visited prior – so it was a huge shock to me how hard Japan is by comparison to find hook ups let alone partners) also I should add, although I may have found my now wife on Tinder, but we actually already had a couple of mutual friends already, so the app just let our paths cross, so I consider that very lucky.
I wouldn’t bother with Tinder now, from what I see it looks like a huge scam… Used to be good though for sure, it’s really a shame it is the way it is now. I wouldn’t bother with Bumble because its whole idea of “women make the first move” is basically the antithesis of how dating culture in Japan works. Men are expected to lead in a relationship and being indecisive or too accomodating is a major ick for many J women.
My advice is to meet people though work, hobby groups etc and the way Japanese people do it, they’ll tell a mutual friend that they’re into a certain person they both know and then ask them to organise a party and get their mutual friend to invite the specific person they’re into to it… same as these match making parties where a group of guys will go out together with a group of girls… It’s weirdly highschool like…
Dating in Japan can be super convoluted but these are two ways it’s normally done.. also then, not to mention you got to get their number and go on multiple dates, go for the hand hold and confess your interest on the third date, there’s a lot of crazy conventions, like a social dance basically that makes the intentions clear without being direct. Its all a bit wierd… anyways maybe better to get tutored on it to stand a chance if it’s a really traditionally minded girl lol it’s kinda crazy IMO and not knowing the basics can just make you look clumsy/cringe.
This all changes if your date has any level of English/ has spent any time abroad.
So not to be a dick but what race are you? On the contrary to what people believe Japanese people are kind of xenophobic and when they date gaijin, it’s usually white foreigners, Koreans, maybe Chinese, etc.
Don’t use tinder. Bumble works for me.