Watched Japanese talk show ≪ダウンタウンなう≫ featuring the food fighter ギャル曽根. When the host complimented how her husband is so handsome and capable, she said, “oh no, there’s no such thing”. Normally you hear this from the husband, didn’t know it was the same for wives. It’s understandable being humble about yourself in Asian culture, but your partner?
Does this have anything to do with Japanese culture objectifying women, thinking they’re owned property and extension of themselves?
Also remembered a line from the tv show <great white tower>, when the wife and mistress had a heated chat, the mistress said, “No men would brag about their wives but they would be proud of their mistresses.” Why?
3 comments
You probably heard about [内外](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uchi–soto) distinction, right? So what happens here is the husband being humble about his whole ‘uchi’ circle when talking to outsiders as he’s supposed to be. Mistresses are different because they are considered ‘soto’ so men are free to brag about them all they want.
It’s simply a formality. Whatever that’s part of your life, or your accomplishment (which marriage is) you’re generally humble about. If someone compliments my wife I’d be humble without being downright insulting because if I respond with “Yeah, she’s great. I couldn’t ask for more” then I might make somebody who is not necessarily happy in the marriage feel bad about themself. All of this just happens automatically and I don’t really think about it
You are thinking too deeply. There is no such deep meaning in those words of hers and the Japanese, she is just being humble.