After living here for sometime and thought I saw it all and grew a thick skin for not giving shit around me, today, I found myself in a situation that left me both shocked and saddened. I was cycling behind a father and his son, who was innocently playing with a chips bag. To my surprise, the father suddenly slapped the child quite harshly, and the sound of the kid crying broke my heart.
I couldn’t stay silent and ended up shouting at the father. The child hadn’t done anything wrong – he was just having fun, unaware of my presence.
How would you react if you witnessed something like this?
Edit1: the father and son were walking and I was in my bicycle.
The kid was barely 5 y.o or younger in a tiny body
29 comments
Well done OP for standing up to the guy, personally I never could have done it. Child abuse is never OK.
They were cycling too when this happened?
I’m confused.
That child will always remember having someone stand up for him. You have set the foundation of how he should not view his father’s abuse as normal while growing up. Thank you.
I would’ve done the same thing. 👍🏼
I’m confused. The child and father were cycling and the child started playing with a chip bag whilst cycling? So then the father struck him for that?
How did the father react to you speaking up?
I think your intention was good but I wouldn’t have done anything because you’ll just have pissed off the unhinged father who will mostly likely take his anger out on his kids at home later.
ITT: so many child abuse victims who want nothing more than to keep the cycle going.
You did the right thing.
I was at an Aeon malls 3rd floor and I saw two young kids maybe four and six, probably brothers, unattended, climbing on a glass barrier. It was very dangerous. They could have fallen three floors down the open atrium to the ground floor. Certain death. What to do? Yell at them in English possibly causing them to panic and fall. Physically grab them? Could be misinterpreted. Escalate to parents or mall staff? There was no one around. I couldn’t bare to watch and just walked away. Still feel conflicted…
How much responsibility do we have to interfere with other peoples bad parenting?
same shit happened to me growing up i think it’s fairly normal and ordinary in asian culture
Well played to you, man. Doesn’t matter what else comes of it, you did well.
Is there more detail? How old was the son? Was the slap to the back of the head or the face? Was is because the child was playing with the bag, or because he was blocking your way? How did the father react to your shouting?
Did you lecture him in Japanese
Good fucking job. Wish that happened with me
People saying OP shouldn’t have said anything:
In my opinion it’s worse to say absolutely nothing and not react- it 100% normalises the situation (honestly, the NOT speaking up even if you see someone being abused or mistreated is one of my least favourite things about Japanese culture.)
I feel that this will not only plant a seed in the child’s head that his father’s behaviour was wrong, but also might make the father realise that it’s not okay. It might jolt something in HIS head or give him the shame he needs. Maybe that’s wishful thinking on my end, but 🤷🏽♂️
Children need to realise what they’re experiencing isn’t normal behaviour. There is so much abuse in Japan that is ignored and normalised because no one wants to be “that person” who stands out and causes inconvenience.
OP’s user name kinda adds to the authenticity of the story.
I’ve seen some gnarly, out-in-the-open domestic violence shit around Hanazono-cho.
not enough details to comment. But smacking kids is not good, but it’s not a crime in Japan.
they were cycling and the father smacked to kid that was riding another bike? riding in a seat behind the father?
I don’t agree with casual violence towards kids but let’s not trivialize the word child abuse here. That just trivializes what people who are actually going through abuse are experiencing.
I would absolutely say something. Good job.
Wonder what a omawari-san would have done if in the OP’s shoes.
If the kid isn’t bruised or bleeding, probably nothing. Then again, I grew up when kids were still paddled in school. In the early 2000’s.
This is still common in the US, whether you agree with it or not. The acknowledgement of this type of abuse is from less than a generation ago in the US, and socially we are one of the most progressive populations in the world. Japan is not a country I would call progressive. This surprises me not one bit.
Something similar happened to me. I was cycling and waiting patiently behind a mother with a baby and a child. I didnt want to pass, I was cycling slowly behind them when the mother realized and fucking KICKED HER CHILD TO THE STREET so I could pass. I was in shock
Good job .. I was preforming a wedding once and before the grandfather slapped the granddaughter in the. face cause she didn’t was scared to be the ring girl … I was so shocked I didn’t say anything..
great you responded quickly
I saw a mom slapping her kid at a museum the other day. Luckily I also noticed an employee trailing the mom and kid, taking notes and talking to her co-workers. So I’m hoping they did something
Thank you for doing this! Many parents feel that beating up their kid, no matter how well/not well the kid behaved, is okay, which in reality, is not. The father now knows what he did was wrong, he won’t admit it, but he now knows. The sad part is that he might become more upset with the kid, but the good part is, the kid too knows now that beating up isn’t normal. The kid will stand up for himself when he’s ready.
Lol at the one guy in this thread commenting all over the place trying to make you feel bad and saying “logic and reason” with the guy slapping a fuckin 5 year old….braindead people in this subreddit
Nice job dude, he deserved to get yelled at
My husband and I witnessed a mom slapping her about 8-9 year old daughter at a park once. The girl was clearly misbehaving, but that doesn’t excuse the mom’s behavior obviously.
We didn’t confront the woman directly but we did keep staring at her on and off during the rest of our time at the park, to watch their interactions and see if it happened again. Many foreigners may not agree with that approach, but i think it works well enough in the Japanese context. Japanese people are typically hyper aware of others’ gaze, and the “what will they think of me” is typically a deterrent to bad behavior (in public at least).
Unfortunately there really isn’t much we can do to stop whatever is happening in private, unless we have evidence that something is bad enough that could get welfare services involved…
While we did feel terrible for that little girl and imagined her home life probably isn’t great, what we saw also was not exactly enough to call the police on them either, so a bit of public censure is about all we could do unfortunately.
Wtf is wrong with those posts insinuating that OP did more harm than good by calling out the father? Yikes?