Advice for young people infatuated with Japan?

15 comments

1. This is a copy of your post for archive/search purposes.

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   **Advice for young people infatuated with Japan?**

   This is going to be a long one.

   I’m a 19 y/o who is infatuated with Japan and speak somewhere around an N5, nearing N4 level. I’ve been to Japan once for 4 months for college at TUJ last year and enjoyed my time, and want to go back. Though, after looking through this subreddit, my thoughts have been jumbled.

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   I’ve wanted to get out of America since I was ~15 and picked Japan since I was ~17. I only recently checked reddit, and before that I had always been told that English teaching was a solid career choice. Now that I’ve come here, it sounds moreso like a prison job at a black eikaiwa and that I should reconsider and need to speak at a business level N2 near-fluent level before even considering moving back to Japan, and even then would find a better education in the states and THEN travelling to Japan.

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   The first half of this post is going to be me talking about my experiences so that those less knowledgeable, younger, and stupider can understand how this has all gone from the eyes of someone who was in that spot once, since I have a LOT to say about TUJ and my whole experience. The second half will be my personal questions to the subreddit. I’m new to reddit, so I apologize in advance for formatting errors.

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   It’s not uncommon for this thread to have “THAT” post that reads something along the lines of “i’m a 17-18 year old who really wants to go to japan and i dont know japanese (but ive been learning hiragana for the past month!) and i dont have any marketable skills but i want to study as soon as i graduate high school with my 2.7 GPA so is there anywhere in japan that offers english courses and teaches japanese and can set me up for a rich and prosperous future comparable to that of a middle eastern sheikh? thanks!” and naturally that post is bombarded with people who tell them that they have no chance and that it’s not even worth it.

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   For these people however, they usually DO look at one place in particular, or end up finding it – TUJ. To these people, this place sounds like heaven on earth. It’s an American Uni out in Japan that teaches in English, can help them learn Japanese, and gives them a totally legit degree in a pretty vast number of fields. With all that, it’s also decently cheap with all things considered regarding American college. Sounds perfect, right?

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   Well, after all the paperwork and processing, you finally end up in Tokyo as a student of TUJ ready to start “a new life” in Japan. If only. I’m sure most of you have seen [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/movingtojapan/comments/tvx343/friends_dont_let_friends_or_even_enemies_go_to/) post about how TUJ students lack the basic knowledge in their career path to even land an entry-level position. Believe what you want about it, but from firsthand experience I can personally say that I can totally see how 13 applicants can know NOTHING about a career field they apparently have a degree in if they got that degree from TUJ.

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   TUJ is mostly American with ~35-40% Japanese. For the Americans, it’s a way into Japan, and for the Japanese it’s a way out. A lot of the Japanese students are going into career fields in Law and Business so they can land a good job in America (or a Commonwealth Country) and screw off from Japan. They usually come from wealthy families and are just there for connections and a gateway to America in an English learning environment and a place that can give them an American degree. I can see this being a good venture, since most of the professors are either English-speaking natives or Japanese who speak English, so there is rarely ever room for miscommunication, and they usually already speak VERY GOOD English (usually at least around a 9th grade level), so they’ve basically got it all set, and apparently many of them do end up moving country and working for prestigious companies and/or embassies.

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   The Americans however are most exactly how I was – an overoptimistic 18 year old kid who doesn’t know what they just got into. Very few people didn’t fit this bill. Only difference for me was that I was entirely funding myself with no scholarships and the past 3 years saving up from part-time at McDs while most everyone else was on their parents dime and/or the government’s handouts for their old man losing his leg to an IED in Afghan ’09. I had enough money for one semester, but these people get the full ride, side effects included.

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   As I said, the professors are either English-speaking natives or Japanese who speak English. When I say “English-speaking natives”, I mean that these people don’t speak Japanese. My best guess is that they were teaching at the main campus in PA, but asked to be moved to Japan or simply got relocated, and they live a comfy life on an American professor’s salary in a gaijin bubble with no intention to ever learn or adapt to Japanese culture/language, even if they’ve been there for 5, 10, or sometimes even 20 years. These people do not care about your education. They’re simply people who treat their job as a semi-early retirement in a beautiful country under the stipulation that they spent 35 – 40 hours “teaching” college courses to uninterested American young adults who aren’t there for the actual education, but rather the setting. Naturally the courses suck when neither the professor OR the students care and both of them just want the class to end so they can go back out for a night on Shibuya or Shinjuku to get schwasted on Super Dry’s and have one night stands with gaijin hunters.

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   The Japanese staff are better, but not by much. They are ESLs, and what TUJ must consider “fluent English” is very lax. Imagine taking a college class where you can only understand anywhere between 50% – 80% of the words the professor is actually saying, and also any question you ask is met with confusion from the professor themselves. Not because they don’t know the answer, but because they don’t know the English that you just said to them, or spoke too fast, or they’ve never heard your accent (I come from a family of Danes and am the first-generation red-blood ‘murican patriot, no shit I’m gonna have an accent).

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   I – much like most Americans – was majoring in Japanese (this is a mistake, do NOT do this, just take the classes as a minor or something) and despite this I didn’t even spend my ONE SINGLE SEMESTER in TUJ in a JAPANESE 101 COURSE. They were apparently too booked with people signing up for the course. How can this be? Well, there are 2 types of American students at TUJ. Japan Admits and Study Abroads. Study Abroads are people who are from the main campus (or occasionally the Rome campus, because Temple has a fucking campus in Rome) who faff about in Japan for a semester. Japan Admits are the people in for the long haul. Apparently, the Study Abroad students get to decide their classes FIRST since they can do it well in advance as they’re already in the system THEN the JA students get to come along and take the scraps. In a vacuum, that sounds fine, but this school is English-based and set in Japan, so obviously the Japanese courses will be popular. Not only that, but the JA students are the ones most likely to take a Japanese major, and even if not they are the most in need of Japanese knowledge, but when I tried to get into a Japanese course, THEY WERE ALL FULL (including the evening ones and the ones with wonky times) so I – a Japanese major meant to live in Japan for 2.5 to 4 years – wasn’t prioritized for learning Japanese over John Dudebro and Jake TrustFund who are here for a 3 month vacay. Amazing system, and I ended up having to go into fucking Chinese for the semester instead. I heard the Japanese classes are the only actually good ones, too.

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   So it all kinda sucks, but you – as an 18 year old who doesn’t know any better and have never even been in a college setting – see no problem and think this is fine. It’s Japan, baby! After classes you get to see cool temples and chat it up with locals and avoid the kinda alarming amount of men who would have fit in better as sexpats than they would have as student residents. No joke, most of my friends during my time in TUJ seemed to spend every other weekend going to Kyoto, or Osaka, or Hiroshima, or Sapporo, etc. I was too poor and stayed in the same couple districts in Tokyo.

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   I got a job about 2 months in as a part-timer in housekeeping. It was an OK job, definitely not the worst job I’ve ever done. I needed money since I was poor and financially irresponsible. 28 hours a week is not enough for any kid wondering if they can book it with their savings from being a part-timer at Walmart for a year alongside a job in Japan. That’s why most people are on the GI bill or insane amounts of student loans, and as such don’t give two shits about getting a job. Reminder: a good bit of the Americans are here to have fun in Japan for an extended period and maybe kinda set up a future somewhere along the way when they get to it.

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   Speaking of that future, what happens after graduation? Personally, I don’t even know. I was there for one semester, ran low on funds since I was self-sustaining with basically no debt (as per my parent’s wishes, since “debt is evil”) and came back home as soon as the semester ended and dropped out entirely. As a “Japanese” major I learned no Japanese. I don’t remember anything from the Maths or English class I went to, and god knows I completely forgot what little Chinese they taught me.

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   But if you are one of the souls who graduates, congratulations! Chances are you’ll go back to America and tell all those people interviewing you how educated you are because you studied overseas in Japan. That or you’re Japanese and your plan was to leave Japan anyways, which you will likely do to actual,

2. This needs to be linked in the wiki. Well done.

3. Not related to your questions but thought maybe worth mentioning. If you still want to go to school and want go for a major that is worth it (required for the field and make decent enough money). Then consider what the in state tuition is for your state and possibly just get into some debt. Some states like Florida are able to pretty heavily subsidize school costs so it might not be too bad if you can get in and out. That and schools can offer some standardized scholarships that don’t really need to be applied to when they offer acceptance if you did well in school.

4. Thanks for this post. I was looking for universities in Japan and wanted to apply at TUJ but I told myself not to rush with uni and look for good education. Thanks man

5. Not an answer to your question but this was very informative and helpful for me to read. thanks for sharing your experience. I’m planning to continue learning Japanese here in the US before anything.

   What kind of job are you looking to find in Japan?

6. 1. No, but I love Japan regardless.

   2. I think I would be paid more if I didn’t move, but money isn’t everything.

   3. Learn Japanese, and get a degree. If you want to have basically any job outside of being an ALT or eikaiwa instructor, get experience too.

7. Thanks for your advice! Some of my thoughts

   1. I planned on wanting to live in Japan, but was unsure if at the time that was a “forever and ever” urge, or a “do it for a few years” urge. Having now visited 4 times, and lived here for coming on a year, I now know it’s the latter, and plan to go back to the United States when it’s time to put down serious family/career roots.
   2. Living here was instrumental in answering that question for me, you can’t really know until you’ve done it, even compared to studying abroad. It’s a whole different animal
   3. I don’t regret it at all, being here has been a ton of fun, learned a lot, very rewarding. I probably won’t stay here forever, but that’s also fine

   On to My advice for you/general young people:

   1. If you have the choice of a US-based degree, or a Japan-based one, pick the US one. If it’s even a semi-decent school, it’ll be recognized in both countries, but the Japan one is only good in Japan. Part of school isn’t “just” the education, but the networking/alumni
   2. I strongly suggest using a few low-stakes opportunities to test out living in Japan before you jump in whole hog. Study abroad, take a scholarship to do a summer program, or if you’ve graduated already, try something like JET.
   3. Get your Japanese to at least N3/N2 level as quickly as is feasible, if you can get to N2/N1 especially, a LOT of doors open up that are slammed shut if you’re not fluent re: employment, and future opportunity. Plus, your life will be made 1000x easier if you can read documents, etc.

8. *Note number 1:* without a university degree, your chances are extremely slim. I came here to work on the JET program. My husband couldn’t apply because he dropped out of uni. So we had him come in on a spousal visa as my dependent. It took forever for him to find a part-time job (which he hated) and even then, they pointed out his lack of a degree. The experience here broke him. He went back to our home country and we’re doing long-distance until I finish my 5 years here. Just something to think about…

   *Note number 2:* my best expat friend is having an extremely hard time with relationships here. Given; she’s a bit of an introvert, but fact remains that every date she has been on has been a disaster. Either gaijin hunters or men who are so entrenched into toxic gender roles that she might as well marry into the Victorian middle-class and be just as well off. The pressure from the Japanese government to get married and have children (because everybody is panicking about the declining birthrate) does not help either. Kids and marriage are on the table by the third date if they’re not just gaijin hunters.
   All this to say that my friend is very depressed and extremely lonely. She has tried to date other expats, but even that is difficult. Those who aren’t waifu hunters are usually still pretty close-minded. Anyway, if you’re not aro-ace, it may be something to think about.

   *Note number 3:* Mental health. You said you had an issue in the military because of it, if I read correctly? This country is about the worst thing you could do for your mental health. They have no support systems of any kind (especially not in English), but they are (very, very slowly) improving. But the stigma against mental illness is still absolutely ridiculous. (I live in Osaka, by the way—while it’s not Tokyo, my understanding is that the view of mental illness is similar.)
   And when I say ridiculous: misbehaving child in class? Must be ADHD. But they will neither evaluate, nor medicate the kid, or even consider giving them therapy. No, they’ll get over their ADHD if you learn to be stricter with them
   Plus society should iron out any undesirable traits, since they will conform or be shamed. The amount of my students who tell me in essays that they “just want to be normal” so their dream career is “office worker” is absolutely heart-breaking (I teach elementary and JHS). I can see how they go from cute and bubbly, to broken and conforming by the time they get out of JHS. The fact that my options to help them are limited absolutely breaks my heart.

   Your personal mental health is also something that will be difficult. As I’ve mentioned, English services to help you are few and far between. If you’re like me and have a diagnosis from back home, you might run into the issue of lack of medication. In my case, the anti-depressant that works for me hasn’t been approved for Japanese use yet, so it’s not available here. The “equivalent” they’ve prescribed is horrible and has some really crappy side effects. The dosage is also way off and it took almost two years to fix. I’m diagnosed with ADHD, major anxiety, PTSD, and major depressive disorder (I’m a lot of fun to be around/s). Some people treat me like I might have a psychotic break when they find out. Others don’t believe me. When I mention my triggers, they treat it as a joke. On the JET program, I have more support than most expats. (My Japanese level is N2 btw, but therapy is still preferable in English to avoid any miscommunication.)

   Sorry, I’m losing my train of thought a bit, but my point is that mental well-being has a long way to go here. (The mandatory yearly medical exam gives you the most ludicrous “stress at work” questionnaire, which is about the extent of mental care you will get unless you seek it out.)

   *Note number 4:* why Japan? I understand you’re infatuated. So was I. And I didn’t come here all busy tailed and bright-eyed because of anime. I majored in anthropology and minored in Japanese. I was interested in Japan from a cultural and historical standpoint. I’ve been a little disappointed by how few Japanese people share these interests, or even know much about it. (The revisionist history in some of their textbooks is absolutely appalling, too! They gloss over WW2 like it was a side-note, except to say that the Americans were very wrong to drop the nuclear bombs—which, I agree, they were.)
   Oh, side-note about the history. I know Japan is an East-Asian country, so the interest in gaijin history is mostly non-existent. However, I never expected so many people to have no clue *at all* about the Holocaust. I’m Jewish and my grandfather was a Birkenau concentration camp survivor… I was shocked by the lack of knowledge or care about the holocaust here. It’s why people can dress in pseudo-Nazi uniforms here and see absolutely nothing wrong with it.

   Alright, that said, my infatuation with Japan remained for almost two whole years before I caved to culture shock. I’m over that now (thank goodness!) but it was an absolutely horrible eight months. I also picked up self-harming during my culture shock phase (which I really should stop doing now). Now that I’m over the culture shock, I’m more at peace with the country. I do love it here, but a part of me is always excited to go back to Canada for the holidays. Holidays can never come around fast enough. There is so much more to say on this topic alone, but I’m trying (and failing) to keep this short.

   Oh, I almost forgot. This is not really an issue for me with my level of Japanese, but it’s a huge problem for a friend of mine: some companies have no English speakers at all. And I’m not talking stores or restaurants. My bank, my utility company and my internet all have no English-speaking representatives at all. I’ve made myriad phone calls for my friends because of this. Just something to think about.

9. 1. I sort of planned it. I married a Japanese woman back in my home country and we talked about living in Japan for a short time, but I definitely didn’t plan on it ending up being the 15+ years it has been now.

   2. I’m pretty sure I’d have had a better paying job by now if I hadn’t. Or at least one I’d enjoy more. But looking at the life I’ve built here with friends and family I love, I can’t really say I regret it. But I think it’s more despite of Japan, than thanks to Japan.

   3. The only prepping you should be doing for Japan is learning Japanese. Don’t plan your education around Japan. You should be seeking out a career you’d enjoy, and building the skills for that career which can make you marketable wherever you end up. As long as you get a BA (or something equivalent) you can get your foot in the door. After that it will be about your skills and your ability to communicate in Japanese (my personal weakpoint).

10. Advice know even with good mental health Japanese culture breaks some people

11. I remember when my (former) friend was talking about their plans to drop everything and go to TUJ. They were already at a nice university in America, but were so infatuated with Japan they wanted to move and start a life there. When this friend was talking about their plans, my grandpa happened to be nearby.

    My grandpa, who worked his ass off to immigrate to America, offered this advice to them, “You would have more opportunity if you stayed in America, studied Japanese for preparation, did some more research, and study abroad. Then if you still believe it’s the right place for you, move when you can secure a job there. Your educational experience may be more valuable in America compared to a country you don’t know anything about.” My grandpa knew nothing about TUJ, but something about my former friend’s plan about moving while knowing nothing set off some red flags for him. This friend didn’t know any Japanese, nor did they really research what they were getting themselves into. Part of me believes my grandpa was offering up some of his own wisdom as someone who has moved countries before (albeit he studied English to a fluent proficiency before moving to the US), but this friend didn’t take any of his advice and instead followed their infatuation.

    Last time I heard about them from a mutual, they had took on another major at TUJ to extend their student visa a few more years. They have since graduated already, but they are working at an eikaiwa while still working their part time restaurant job they had while attending TUJ, so this situation doesn’t sound too off from what OP has also described 😔

    To answer OP’s questions:
    1. No, it wasn’t planned. I actually had a really horrible experience when I first came to Japan, and didn’t see myself ever coming back to live there. But I ended up meeting my SO while I studied abroad (though we didn’t start dating until many years after we met).

    2. I don’t necessarily regret it, but I see the current exchange rate and sort of get worried about the future since my SO and I do eventually plan to move back to America. My experience living here now is so much different than when I was a student, so the experience has improved by a lot. I currently work in the tech industry, so I see my experience here as more of a stepping stone since I happened to land a unique position that will boost my career opportunities in America.

    3. The end goal isn’t just “move to Japan”. There needs to be a goal for what you actually want to do with your life too. Japan just might be the place where it happens. Learn the language and try to do a study abroad program for minimum a year or something before committing to moving. Experiencing a little bit of the country is better than experiencing nothing at all. I personally think anything less than 6 months is more of an extended vacation, whereas a full year will paint a more accurate picture of what to expect. Moving across the world is a big deal and it *needs* to be done while well informed. I was fortunate that I had been studying Japanese academically for about 4-5 years before studying abroad in HS, so when I did my year abroad I had a very realistic depiction of Japan from the getgo and knew it wasn’t some magical place. Other exchange students were often given a pass because they couldn’t communicate and were able to experience Japan in a fantasy bubble, but I was held to a very different standard.

12. My take on TUJ is that I don’t trust any school with a Tiktok (is it official tho?)

13. Just out of curiosity, you seem to have no natural links to Japan. What are your top motivations for wanting to live here? Just trying to understand your mindset.

    Excellent and much needed post for others here.

14. This sub seems very kind and supportive, but y’all (OP + commenters) could stand to chop your paragraphs up a bit finer. Really, just a ton of typing happening here.

15. I just really want to visit some day, be an ethical tourist. Not live there though.