We want to marry, now what?

10 comments

1. I’ve given it some thought and as it happens I have no idea what you’re talking about.

2. Don’t worry about it. If she wants to take your name, cool. She’ll still actually be Japanese, you realise?

   It’ll work out. Maybe she’ll feel a bit more exotic.

   My wife and kids use my name and it’s always been fine. I was fine with my wife keeping her name but she wanted to change.
   We live in a city and the particular area is more cosmopolitan than most, so our experience is not necessarily typical, but it has been fine for us. Having one name simplifies some paperwork things, too. Stuff like our kids passports. They just have the same names in English and Japanese. Probably not an issue for your case.

3. > I’ve felt the weight of being a foreigner in Japan

   What weight? I have been living in Tokyo for almost 10 years and I haven’t felt any weight.

4. Congratulations on the marriage!

5. I’m not sure but I don’t think she can take your last name if she’s a Japanese national because of the family registry system. Have you checked on that?

6. Diet and exercise will help with the weight pal. Lay off the Strongs too.

7. I think things will be more complicated as an international couple if you don’t have the same last name. For example, if you move to another country and need to prove that you are actually married.

8. Just get her to figure it out. There’s no point marrying a native here if you can’t get them to do the admin /s

   In all seriousness, she’ll be able to find out in a few Google searches. Not trying to be an arse but it’s probably easier than asking here.

9. Yes.

10. I’m married to a Japanese. We didn’t change our names. I was worried about all those documents I would have to change. She is okay with it. So she said our names can changed afterwards. If you want to get married and don’t change your names for now, it can be done later. I’d recommend this option because it seems a big deal to you so you both should talk about it. Congratulations.