Language+culture Tips needed – expressing food sensitivities

Hi!!

I will be traveling to Japan very soon and I already know some language basics, but I would really appreciate some guidance on how to express some particular phrases, and would like some guidance on how food culture is.

Context: I am a picky eater. Like…really picky. Im neurodivergent and have a lot of sensory issues, and if you know what ARFID is, I basically have "arfid-lite". I also have a condition called geographic tongue which makes spicy things (which I'm sensitive to to begin with) cause my tongue to break out and become inflamed and painful 🙁 all of this said, I am very embarrassed to be this way and trust me, I am always willing to try new foods. They just always disgust me. My priority is being respectful/not embarrassing myself but also not starving to death as I travel.

So my first questions are cultural. Is it rude to ask for ingredients to be removed? Is it rude to ask for the type of meat on a dish be substituted (aka chicken instead of beef?). What level of spice is considered "not spicy?", if I ask about spice level? Will I be absolutely laughed at if I order off the kids menu (when applicable), or is it relatively acceptable to do?

My second question is the best and most polite way to ask these requests (if they can be asked at all). If I just preface by saying "I'm autistic", will that give me understanding and not have staff frustrated with me or confused, or would that make it worse? Should I just lie and say I am allergic to whichever ingredient I wish to be removed from my dish so it's more socially acceptable? Or are excuses not needed?

Based off of the Japanese I know, I would think I can say 私はすしを食べません and 好がすしはじゃないです but I'm not sure if the connotations of one phrasing vs another are substantial, or of these sentences are actually correct 😅

Thank you so much for your guidance!

Edit: not to be overly defensive, but I do feel the need to clarify a couple things here.
I clearly do not expect anything from anyone and would be nothing but polite if a request of mine is denied, and I'm not sure where in my post would imply otherwise. I'm so embarrassed by being even politely denied that I'm wanting to avoid that to begin with by learning what kind of requests are typically given or not.

I would never order off-menu, or ask for ridiculous changes. I don't plan on setting myself up for these situations, but I will be traveling with my girlfriend. I just want to be aware of if she wants to go to an omurice restaurant, if I should bother seeing if they could make mine without sauce on top, or if I should just not eat while there.

If I'm someone who's concerned about being laughed at for ordering off the kids menu, I assure you I am not someone who would make demands, ask for ridiculous accommodations, or anything similar.

Id just like to enjoy my trip and be able to try new foods that are perhaps just one topping away from being something I would enjoy. If that's not culturally acceptable, then I'll stick with boring choices. It's why I'm asking instead of flying over and assuming it's something I can ask.

by straycharmshoppe

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