JJapanese

New haiku: stars in daylight

I remember being in the midday sun and seeing all the seashells on the beach look like stars in the daylight. I tried writing two haiku to show this. How is the grammar, and which do you like best?

1.

貝殻や

真昼の時に

浜の星

2.

散り散りな

貝殻や浜

の星かな

1 comment

  1. I don’t get how や is working here. It’s working like a は or a が but I don’t know if there are special exemptions (poetic license) for haiku.

    Can anyone explain it?

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