So long story short, I haven't been studying Japanese for long. I had to help at university to welcome some visiting students and I really hit it off with one of them. My Japanese is still quite lacking but we've been texting in Japanese. I'm not sure if it was clear that I like him. (Please don't judge my abysmal sentence, my Japanese is not good, at all. He did insist on us using short form with eachother, that's why there's no ます in case you're wondering)
My confession: 実は、君はかっこよくて、優しいと思う。好きだ
I feel like maybe I shouldn't have included the と思う. I also wonder, does it sound like just me saying I like him as a friend? I'm not sure because of culture difference
His response: こちらこそ、とても優しくてかわいい(my name)が好きだよ😊
The こちらこそ confuses me, I learned that this is used when someone apologises or thanks you and you want to say "no I'm the one who should apologise" or "I'm the one who should say thank you". (In case this adds context, after that he sent a message saying また会おう)
Edit: I've been made aware that 君 is wrong, I'm embarrassed but I won't make the same mistake again 😂 I only saw in my class that it means "you"
by VadaElfe
8 comments
Deleted my last one, because I’m not sure what to think with his new message. Guess you’ll need to go see him to see. Let us know how it goes:)
I think that person likes you as well. The only thing that seems confusing and I am not an expert at all is the “君“ I think is mostly used from men to women ? And when the relationship is already deep or I imagine some scholars using it. I would have used “their name さん”. Do not worry, tell that person to go somewhere to have a date <3
He is basically saying “same here, you’re very kind and cute and I like you :)”
It definitely sounds like the feeling is mutual! You should meet up and see what the vibes feel like in person, often that can be easier to tell even without verbal communication.
like another commenter said, (his name)さん instead of 君 sounds more natural, but the こちらこそ means he feels the same! hope you guys get to go on a date soon 🙂
Don’t worry, it is very clear from both of your messages that you like each other. Congrats!
いいね、日本人の友達ができましたね、僕は一人でChatGPTと日本語で話しています（πーπ）
I’m not a native, so take what a native Japanese speaker says above this comment, but こちらこそ is fine, as when someone compliments you and you compliment that person back, that is used. It’s like, “Oh, no. I’m the one who should be singing your praises.”
I do have two worries, though…neither of which other commenters so far appear to have, so take them with a grain of salt. But こちらこそ can also be a bit formulaic in that you feel you need to respond with that. That is, rather than saying, “I just see you as a friend”, you might instead use that and pay back the compliment. It’s not bad in itself, but it’s not conclusive proof of anything. In the end, his reply just appears to have said the same thing as yours (You are nice + You are cute/handsome + I like you), without adding much extra, so it could simply be a mirroring response to your compliment of him. But it could also be a lot more…
You also said he’s a visiting student, and また会おう has a ring to me like he may be saying, “Let’s meet again someday (even though I’m going back to my life in Japan).” So it’s very unclear as to whether he actually wants to meet you soon, or if he’s talking about visiting one time as friends at some point in the future. (Of course, if he’s staying for another year, I would take it differently than if he is set to leave in a month.)
Thus, I think that more clarity is needed. Since long distance relationships can be very difficult, you may also want to think hard about the situation and any prospects for the future. If you think he’s worth pursuing, then it’s likely you’ll have to make your feelings more clear and actually suggest going out and actually starting to date.
reminded me of the ” The moon is beautiful, isn’t it?” anime incidents