Did I mess up?

I’m a new ALT in a small town. I was at an elementary school today and there was a kid standing in the middle of the hallway. I playfully (and lightly) tapped between his shoulders and they looked around for a sec, but didn’t really react. I did it again, and they said something (not sure what) but it sounded like a complaint. I’m now quite worried that I actually offended the student. I legit was just trying to be funny, and wanting them to move aside slightly.

I’ve noticed many of the other teachers are quite hands on with the students, but they have a more developed relationship than I do, so I’m worried that I misread things. I’m pretty socially awkward, and this makes me really anxious.

11 comments
  1. I didn’t stop to apologise, as it was near my destination, I wanted to afterwards, but I couldn’t remember their face, and they were busy with organising the school lunches.

  2. For asking an ES student I didn’t know to move in a corridor, I would probably say ‘excuse me’ (or ‘sumimasen’) and then maybe touch their upper arm lightly.

    Tapping them on the back might be a bit confusing.

  3. You may well have messed up.

    It won’t matter unless you mess up much, much worse.

    Learn from it, tune your behavior, and move on. People expect new ALTs to not fit in perfectly at the start.

  4. You’re probably fine, but yeah be careful with physical contact. I’d only do something like that if I knew the kid and we had a good relationship to joke around and such.

  5. As an ALT you shouldn’t touch any of the kids.

    Also if I was tapped on the shoulder I’d assume you wanted something. He likely said “Nande?” (why?) in a slightly exasperated voice.

    Also… they’re Elementary school kids. Don’t take their reactions/what they say seriously.

  6. Don’t overthink too much. You’re probably fine and the kid was just surprised. I do that too sometimes and their reactions vary. Some kids think it’s funny and tap me back while some kids are just awkward and confused lol

  7. Yeah bruv, you messed up big time. Say goodbye to your job.

    Edit:
    Why am I getting downvoted, this is obviously sarcasm.

  8. I 100% guarantee the kid had probably forgotten about by that afternoon and you’re still dwelling on it. That being said, wait till you’ve been in the school longer and developed a trust between the other teachers and students. Once you gain a bond, and the kids are used to you, then they’ll know you are joking around.

  9. >I playfully (and lightly) tapped between his shoulders

    Whether you messed up or not depends a lot on what this move was.

    But in general it’s a good idea to keep your hands to yourself.

  10. Don’t touch a child, not even a tap.

    That could be misconstrued awfully whether by intention or not.

    I’m sure it’ll be okay. You’re a foreigner, they’ll likely give you a pass if there is any issue.

  11. They were probably confused and didn’t understand that you were joking around, or they understood you were joking, but don’t know you well enough for it to be okay. When you’re a new teacher it’s pretty much a good idea to not touch any students (even innocent shoulder taps), unless you absolutely have to (to move them out of danger or something.) Especially because you’re a foreigner, you just don’t want any potential misunderstandings to come up. Once you’ve built up trust at the school and especially with the students then you’ll know what’s appropriate and when.

    But don’t sweat this particular situation because I’m willing to bet that at worst the student thinks you’re a little odd, which doesn’t have to be a bad thing.

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