I can read and listen just fine, but if someone randomly asked me say this thing. I’d have difficulty and probably have to consult my book. After looking I’d be like oh right now I remember, that makes sense. But in the moment, like if my teacher calls on me to say something I usually fuck it up in some way. It’s really embarrassing and makes me feel like I have memory problems. Or is it just anxiety?
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Completely normal… output is a different process then reading or listening. Try writing something down on paper (Romaji or pure kana is OK) you will find it super difficult. I can’t write Kanji at even a slow speaking pace, but I can manage this – even if you mess up the “Spelling” the fact you say it as you write it really blocks part of your English-brain. Very simple sentences and no more than one new grammar point every 5 minutes of practice. Even if you are just swapping nouns and verbs, it will build your output “base”.