In my neighborhood I consistently hear kids that sound much less than 10yr-olds yelling in the street at 10 pm on weekdays. It’s always the same kids.
I admittedly – how do I say this – don’t live in a good “socio-economic” area. Before I assume unschooled-parenting, I want to check that it’s not a cultural/generational thing of kids going to bed later than when I was that age.
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Our kid is 6 and wakes up at 6:30 so we aim for 8pm, not always successfully but she’s usually asleep before 9. I’ve heard from friends that they ‘can’t’, whatever that means, get their kids in bed before 10-10:30. I personally feel that’s a little late for 6 year olds.
About 20 years ago, I came across 2 (Japanese) kids playing on my street at midnight. They were around 5-7 years old but both had flowing host hair, permed with brown and blonde highlights.
I thought it was strange and wrong that these kids were out so late so i asked where there parents were. The older kid pointed up at their apartment, laughed and carried on.
It was at this point that I realized it was none of my business.
But 20 years later, I remember it clear as day
I have 2 kids being 5 or younger…. Both sleeps between 930pm to 1030pm. Tends to wake up around 730-8am.
We put our daughter to bed around 8:30 and she’s usually asleep around 9, sometimes if she takes longer nap during the day usually after lunch then she wouldn’t fall asleep until 10
Around 9pm on school nights for both kids. One Is elementary the other is kindergarten
In elementary school, the kids might have been up until 10 pm on most nights due to the fact that both my spouse and I work quite late and sometimes dinner is later than we’d like it to be, but they certainly weren’t out playing on the street at that time.
Since the oldest began going to Junior High, with its significantly more strenuous schedule and requirements, she’s been going to bed before 9 pm on her own without any prompting from us. The younger ones have started to follow suit to “be like big sister.” So no complaints here.
8:45 or so for the younger ones, and 9:45 for our oldest (upper elementary age).
The 3 y/o next door to us, on the other hand, is stomping and screaming until almost midnight most every night.
There will always be kids that stay up late, and there will always be kids that stay out late. I am often a bit surprised by the kids that I see in the supermarket at, like, 11:00pm.
Don’t forget though that you don’t notice the kids that are in bed by 9:30 because…they are in bed, so it’s partly confirmation bias at play. If there are 500 kids in your area and you see 4 or five at 11pm, that’s a hell of a lot of kids you aren’t seeing.
Out of the parents I know bed times vary between 9:00pm until midnight or later.
Some parents have odd work schedules, and some kids don’t sleep easily.
My daughter goes to bed at 7pm, and is usually asleep by 7:20~7:30, but she’s only 3 y/o. For me it sounds like a normal bedtime for such a small child, but when i talk with other moms at the jidokan they’re always very surprised, they say their toddlers are up until 10 or 11…
It doesn’t look like japanese moms are very keen on sleep training…
I live in a weird area where there are some very traditional Japanese households on the upper side of the middle class and some on the lower side. The upper-side kids, who have great parents I might add, are usually the last the fall asleep on the street. Depends on the kids, parents schedule and such.
For my nearly three year old, we usually aim for slowing down at 7:30 and in bed by 8 with a story. Sometimes that gets pushed later depending on schedules or earlier if their tired AF from the day.
My daughter is 5. We aim at putting her in bed by 8:30-9 pm. However my friend has a 4 yo boy who doesn’t sleep until midnight. So it really depends on kids.
You should check up on the local snacks and complain to their mothers.
That’s a rough joke but, you got no idea what those kids got going on at home. If you’re truly concerned, call the police and don’t post on Reddit.
Try to go to bed at 8:30 but actually sleeps between 9:00-10:00. Wakes up between 7:00-8:00
Our 9 year old goes to bed around 9pm give or take.
Some days he has sports after school that don’t finish until 8:30pm, those days it can easily stretch out until 10pm.
He is definitely not out in the street though and nor are any other kids after about 8 to 8:30.
8:30pm Devices off – kids end up sleeping between 9pm and 10:30pm
Before 9 pm he has a melatonin. If not …then we put him into bed at 9 pm but he doesn’t sleep until 10:30-11pm.
I went to bed at 8pm always when little so just following that rule.
3yo.
Bed time “starts” at 9.30pm but is always awake until 11 at least, no matter what.
Interesting topic. I was trialling a new textbook at uni at the end of last school year and the topic we trialled was rest/sleep in Japan vs other countries.
One of the interviewees in the book was an Australian (as am I) and they said that on several of the free to air TV channels, at 7:30, an animal character would come on and to a little announcement that it was time to go to bed. I showed the students several of the commercials and they were stunned. The topic got on to “have you ever seen anything like this?” (never!) and “did you have any kind of set bed-time when you were in elementary school”?
It was pretty much 100% that NONE of them had any kind of set bed time or routine to go to bed when they were in elementary school. They just did whatever until they went to bed. I was particularly struck by the fact that none of them had any bed time stories or reading with parents.
It’s not like a lot of kids don’t have that in Australia (hell, my youngest niece would be up at midnight when she was a toddler. My sister gave up as the kid could outlast her every time), but I was struck by how much it wasn’t even a “thing” for my students to have a bed time schedule/routine with their parents.
Nearly five month old baby, by 8 pm is bedtime. By the baby’s choice, thankfully, though he is up on his own at nearly 6 am on the dot every day too. Baby likes his schedule.
Our 4 year old sleeps from 7:30/8ish to 6:30am. No more afternoon naps and she’s always been a great sleeper at night.
In Kindergarten years up through G1 the bedtime was 8pm, now in G3 it is around 8:30-9pm.
Bedtime for mine is usually somewhere between 9:30 and 10PM.
That said, there is a huge difference between “bed time” and “time they are allowed to be outside.” My kids are never out of the house after about 7PM.
My father was relentless—even merciless—in waking up the entire household at 6:00 AM. Basically, I had 18 years of training in waking up early, and the habit has worked out well for me. School and jobs are just easier if you are on time and wide awake.
My father also demanded that we were in our rooms and in bed by 9 PM. We were permitted to read until 10 PM, after which all lights had to be out.
After I started dating, I started staying up later, but I’m still in bed earlier than most people.
Ours is generally in bed by 21:15, but takes about half an hour to actually go to sleep.
The kids sleep in kindergarden from 1 to 3, so by the time they get home they’re still full of energy.
Oldest is 8 and goes to bed by 8pm. Most friend’s kids go to bed between 9-10pm.
The routine for my 1.5-year-old is bath at 7:30pm and bed immediately after. He’s usually asleep between 8 and 9pm, then wakes up between 5 and 7am.
My SIL, however, would have her kids out at 10 or 11pm (or later!) when they were younger. Every time I would see that, I would always tell my wife, “Hell no! Our son’s bedtime is 8:30pm until he starts dating!”
2 year old here, walks to bed by himself at 6pm, wakes up at 6am.
My daughter (11) goes to bed around 9pm. But I usually act goofy and we start laughing so she is probably asleep around 10……
My kids both under the age of 6 go to bed at around 8:00-8:30p.m, and get up around 6:30a.m. Their cousins though of similar age go to bed at 11p.m, both parents drink light alcohol in the evening watching TV while their kids are free to roam and do whatever. Each family is different i guess. I have never heard them say そろそろ寝かした方がいい while we say it quite frequently .
10 year olds should be getting about 10 hours sleep so if they need to be up at 7 to go to school, they should be in bed at 9pm.
Pre-school need about 12 hours and toddlers even more.
We aim to get our 3-year-old reading a book in bed together at about 9 or 9:10, lights off by 9:30 at the latest.
Some other parents have told me their kid, around the same age, sleeps about 10 or even 11. No way.
My 6 year old just started elementary school and the school recommended bedtime is 8pm which is the time we do anyway. Most of his friends have bedtimes between 8-9pm But it’s important to recognise that a lot of things can change this.
Sometimes we go out and do stuff where we don’t get home until late. For example over the spring break we went to Kidzania and it was about 10om by the time we finally got home. If you’d seen us that day you might assume he goes to bed late. Also we switch it up sometimes. For example in the summer holiday last year we got into the habit of having a siesta after lunch for 2-3 hours during the hottest part of the day and then going out to play in the local park after it got dark and having a late bedtime. One time we were there after dark and I found a lost kids keitai that was ringing. I answered and it was the mom so I explained where I’d found the it and mom came to pick it up. Kid turned up whilst we were there and let’s just say mom was pissed. Most kids playing out by themselves around here are expected to go home when they hear the 5pm music.
Also remember that kids who go to houikuen have long afternoon naps plus they might not be getting picked up until 6pm or later- making early bedtimes almost impossible.
We used to live in a 1 room house with a shared bed, so bedtime was usually 10pm for the whole family, with a wakeup time of 8:30-9am. We’re all kinda B-types so it worked ok.
Now our son is a 1st year so we’ve had to start getting up around 7am, so bedtime prep starts around 8pm and ideally we’re down around 9.
2 yo here, 8pm is sleep time.
For us, it’s around 8 p.m.
But I’ve seen some parents with 3 year olds or whatever in Izakaiya at like 10 or 11 p.m. Crazy stuff!
9pm
We bathe the toddler at around 7:30 give him a glass of warm milk and straight after chuck him in his bed and say good ight, all before 8 and he never cries or has a problem with it, all about routine.
6months or so ago we took a trip overseas for a couple of weeks and he had a tough time adapting, when we came back he cried at bedtime for about 5-10minutes a night, but a week later he was perfect again.
My (now) 3.5yo goes to bed at 8PM sharp, has a few kisses from the daddy and gets covered in a nice blanket, with his favourite plushy. Close the door and he’s sleeping like a log 5 minutes later.
Didn’t have to do any sleep training really because he’s had his own crib since he was 1 week old and always slept in his own room (I don’t understand co-sleepers unless the housing situation demands that). He used to go to bed at 9PM but since he became 3 and kindergarten started, he’s so active during the day that I shifted the 9PM -> 8PM gradually over a week.
He was literally difficult to get up on the morning if he went to bed at 9. Going at 8 and he’ll get 11 solid hours of sleep seems to be just enough; he’s a little sleepy head in the morning but also very much ready to get up.
My daughter is 1, she goes to bed at 7:45~8PM, she wakes up around 7:30AM.
Sadly bedtime is 9:30pm. Earlier would be nice but it doesn’t happen.