A couple days back I went to a girl’s bar where a girl sat for sometime with me and tried to flirt. I bought her 1 drink out of courtesy and she was happy. Before heading out, we exchanged LINE contact. She messaged me after reaching home that day but I didn’t reply. And today (after about one week) she messaged me again with a sticker. I replied out of courtesy and asked what she was doing, after some basic chat she asks when are we meeting again, I said I don’t know so she asks if I would be interested in meeting up for a lunch at any place of my choice in tokyo. I am not sure what her true motives are. Does this happen often? What could be the worst thing that can happen?
25 comments
The worst that can happen is she tries to get you to buy some super expensive special pottery or some beautiful art pieces
It’s 99% a sales pitch to get you to pay for her stuff either directly or as a bar customer. I bet she keeps an entire list of customers on what would be her work LINE account.
Source: My friend worked at a Girl’s Bar
The worst things that can happen may be
* she wants to take you to a daytime cabaret she works at
* she wants to take you to a gallery that sells expensive silk screen pictures or something
* she tries to recruit you to her cult or multi level marketing scheme
* she wants to make friends and you reject her
If she wants you to pick the place for lunch, the first and second would be inconvenient and less likely. The third is a common story but that can happen anywhere from school to workplace to hobby circles.
Why not go out and see?
It’s called dohan. Meet before she goes to work and then she convinces you to go to the club with her and spend money. She gets a nice kickback for bringing in customers. Or…She’s really interested in you?
Ask if she likes McDonald’s nuggets, split a box of 15. Then leave if she tries to take you to a club.
I’d say, humor the invite but be wary of where and on what she wants you to spend money. You’re under no obligation to do more than common courtesy for a lunch date, and don’t have to meet her again if it is just to try and lighten your wallet.
Don’t do it. She is most likely going to ask you to go back to the girls bar with her
Say sure, let’s go grab ramen or Matsuya. It’s usually an automated machine for payment so she can pay for herself. If she’s trying to get money from you, she will probably decline.
“I went to a girls bar and she tried to flirt”. Isn’t this what girls bars are all about
Everyone in the thread worried she’s tricking you to buy expensive lunch or something, but it isn’t that. If she has work immediately after and tries convincing you to go with her it’s called dohan. The goal is to get you to go back with her and spend more money, and she looks good to her boss. Very common amongst the guys and girls in those places.
You’re now a client.
Probably is just sales covered of fake flirt… If you want to test that, tell her to do an activity that doesn’t relate to money and instead effort of some kind.
Let’s go for a run?
How about hiking?
Let’s go to a park?
Ideally all far enough from that girl’s bar you met her and ideally in the morning ( since normally is when they sleep)
Go Starbucks get a coffee, If she directly ask u to go to a specific bar/place to expend money say no sayonara
I’ve had both … some so it as a business to bring you to their club … others just wanted to go out ….
Maybe she really likes you or wants a fling?
The only way to find out is to go!
If it’s a pitch to go back to the girls bar, buy an expensive urn, join Amway/other cult, you can always bail.
This is part of her job, dude.
The exact same thing happened to me.
She wanted a date. We started with dinner at a restaurant. We split the bill. Then Karaoke.
It was nice but getting very late so I was about to go back home. She invited me to the love hotel. We went. Was OK but not great.
She wanted to see me again after that but I told her I wanted to stop there.
I’m not saying the same thing will happen to you, just that it is possible she has no other motives than spending time with you.
Invite her for lunch at your place 😉
Watch “Sanctuary”. She’s *that* girl.
Girl’s bar. No need to say more.
Dunno guys. He bought her ONE drink. And then ignored her. Lol.
I wouldn’t see that as very prospective business wise. I imagine I’d be far more inclined to follow up with actual interest. Either that or she’s a shit tier staff with no good sources.
¯_( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)_/¯
I mean just be direct with her, I know Japan isn’t about that least according to YouTube but don’t hurt to just be like yo what’s up 🐱
If you reply out of courtesy then it means you are not interested. That’s all you need to know
If you enjoyed her company and are capable of saying No directly, go grab some lunch.
If you can’t say No even when you really want to and cry about it later online, don’t go
Ahhh the naivety of the thirsty male