Weird one.
I’m contemplating moving to Japan (company willing to sponsor me) and the money is good but I am becoming conscious of my other life goals. I am looking to get married and have kids in the next couple of years (I’m 30).
Although I’m not opposed to it, I don’t see myself marrying a Japanese girl. To be honest, I want to marry someone who comes from a similar cultural background as I (Australia/UK) to a lesser extent (USA/Europe) **BUT** I also want to continue maximising my life experiences (e.g., living in Tokyo for a few years) before moving back to the West.
To those of whom who are currently living in Japan, are there many opportunities to dating women from the West?
It’s a weird question, I get it. I really do.
Edit: People are (unsurpisingly) accusing me of racism. I just want someone with the same/similar upbringing as I. The race is not important. I also don’t want to be inhibited by a language barrier and so on. Living in Japan would be for two years, not for a lifetime.
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This is a copy of your post for archive/search purposes.
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**Dating other Westerners?**
Weird one.
I’m contemplating moving to Japan (company willing to sponsor me) and the money is good but I am becoming conscious of my other life goals. I am looking to get married and have kids in the next couple of years (I’m 30).
Although I’m not opposed to it, I don’t see myself marrying a Japanese girl. To be honest, I want to marry someone who comes from a similar cultural background as I (Australia/UK) to a lesser extent (USA/Europe) **BUT** I also want to continue maximising my life experiences (e.g., living in Tokyo for a few years) before moving back to the West.
To those of whom who are currently living in Japan, are there many opportunities to dating women from the West?
It’s a weird question, I get it. I really do.
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If you are in a big city I would say this is possible. I know many other foreigners with the same goals.
You should probably just stay in Dingoland with your prestigious culture of English convicts and criminals.
God forbid you accidentally marry someone who can pronounce “H” correctly.
Firstly why live in another country if you are not interested in mingling and dating the people? If you don’t want to marry a Japanese girl and want to live in Japan you will fail friend. You to good for Japanese women or something? That’s a bit racist that you want to live here but feel white girls are better lol. I suggest you stay or move to another western country. In the first place most of the white girls want Japanese men in the first place. They only get desperate when they can’t find love because they refuse to adapt to a Japanese lifestyle. You can try to come here but without Japanese support network you will fail. Another Gaijin can’t help you in the way Japanese can. I for the sake of your future will give you advice that you should listen to well. Stay away from Japan with that kind of attitude. I wish I could give you an award for posting the dumbest shit post on Reddit.
Tokyo is just unbelievably massive. You can definitely find a pool of westerners looking to date. My experience with dating non-Japanese was there were way more girls from China, Philippines, Vietnam, etc. than Europeans or Americans but they were very western minded. I didn’t think I’d marry a Japanese girl either (only because of cultural differences) but within 3 months of moving here I met the love of my life and she was born and raised in Japan but lived abroad in western countries before so she has the best of both worlds in her personality. Therefore I wouldn’t limit yourself to just non-Japanese because there are loads of Japanese who are very western minded here. The biggest concern really is where the person wants to settle down in the future, but you’re going to run into that if you date an American and you want to move back to Australia or wherever anyways.
Anyways, I guess I didn’t make much of a point, but I wouldn’t disqualify moving here just because you don’t think the dating pool is large enough.. like I said, Tokyo is massive.
Oh, hey. There was [a foreign woman who struggled to find love in Japan the other day](https://www.reddit.com/r/japanlife/comments/175u3u7/struggling_to_find_love_in_japan_as_a_foreign/), maybe you two should hook up. She’s Australian, too! Fits right into your requirement.
Make sure you are handsome, educated, artsy, liberal hipster with a good job, though.
From your post it sounds like other “westerners” are about the only people you’ll be interacting with anyway.
Very strange indeed
Download Bumble and you’ll be perfectly fine in Tokyo (in my experience).
Wait, you want to get married in a few years but you’ll only be living in Japan for a couple years AND don’t want to date a Japanese woman? How will that work? Are you hoping youll get lucky enough to find an Australian/UK woman who’s also only staying in Japan for a couple years and willing to move back afterwards? The chances of that happening seem quite low.
Won’t it make more sense to just visit Japan for a while and then try the whole dating to marry thing after you return?
I think Tokyo is probably your best bet but Osaka is another great choice, just to confirm are you not in Japan now? why not start looking in your home country as I’m sure there are plenty of people who love to travel on dating apps (from Australia also).
OP, don’t listen to people projecting their personal views and insecurities on you. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to live abroad for a couple of years while also trying to meet someone from a similar cultural background. I met my bf here, we’re both foreigners and we’re doing better than most couples we know here. Start by establishing upfront that you’re planning to move back in 2 years. A lot of western women here are tired of living in this country, especially ones that have been here for a few years. This country is very unfriendly to women in general, especially foreign women, so while it might be a bit more challenging, you will have no problem finding someone.
Bumble is good for finding other foreigners. You can also connect with people via Bumble BFF and then meet someone naturally through acquaintances. If you prefer irl interactions, try going to events that are held by foreigners, preferably something hobby/activity based. There’s nothing wrong with having a preference, especially one that aligns with your future goals.
As an Asian Japanese citizen, I don’t think it’s racism. You were sent to Japan for your job and may be going back home sooner or later, so your desire to date non-locals is valid.
However, it’s really hard to find someone here. Many young Western people only stay here for a while and then return to their home countries, as you might have to do in the future.
And people like you often already have their own partners back home. Others are students or teachers. The former ones may be too young for you, and they don’t often date older expats. The latter group is usually into Japanese people or East Asians in general.